‘I shouldn’t think I’m needed,’ she said.
‘No arguments! Once a member of this family, always a member. Isn’t that what we’ve always told you?’
‘But I can’t abandon Jakob.’
‘Oh, I think your delightful companion can fend for himself for a while. Am I right, Jakob?’
He smiled. ‘Go ahead, Nina, I’ll see you later.’
Knowing it was futile to resist, Nina downed her champagne in one long swallow and after handing the empty glass to a passing waitress, she set off with Lindsay and all the other guests now leaving the marquee and heading across the lawn.
‘Is it serious between you and Jakob?’ Lindsay asked as they approached a magnificent yew tree where the photographer was directing guests to line up in two rows, ‘because if it is, if there is the chance of it being something lasting, you shouldn’t take anything to heart that Hilary says. It’s just that she can’t accept that anyone could replace her darling boy.’
‘I know that, but does she have to be so vile and so possessive of me?’ Nina said. ‘It’s like she wants me to remain as miserable as she is. Can’t you speak to her?’
Lindsay gave a short laugh. ‘Sorry to disappoint you, but that’s way above my pay grade. Hilary doesn’t listen to anyone, she’s always been like that, even as a child, she always knew best and would dig her heels in for the stupidest of reasons. It was a defence mechanism then and still is.’
‘Against what?’
‘Against being overlooked. In an ideal world she should have been an only child and not one of three, then she would have been a much happier person. Did you know that she never wanted Hugh to have a brother or a sister?’
‘No,’ replied Nina, surprised at the apparent swerve in their conversation. ‘Why was that?’
‘It would have meant she had to share him,’ said Lindsay. ‘And that’s something Hilary was incapable of doing.’
‘I was led to believe that she was given medical advice that another pregnancy was too risky.’
‘Risky for whom?’ said Lindsay archly. ‘Of course that was the party line she told everyone, but I never believed that was the whole story.’
‘Did Keith want more children?’
‘Of course he did. But you know Keith, anything for a quiet life.’
‘Yes,’ Nina said absently, thinking of the man she thought she knew and the one she’d seen getting out of the punt in Cambridge and the intimate exchange between him and the woman he was with. The memory of their undeniable closeness suddenly made her long to be treated with the same tenderness.
‘Like I said,’ Lindsay continued, ‘don’t put too much store on what Hilary says. We all know Hugh’s death hit her hard. He was her life. That’s why she takes it out on everybody around her, to lessen the pain of losing him.’
‘But he was my life too!’ Nina said crossly. ‘He was my husband, the man I loved! Why does Hilary’s grief eclipse everybody else’s, including mine?’
Lindsay came to a standstill and while other guests surged past them, their happy chatter at odds with the flood of emotions threatening to burst through Nina’s self-control, Lindsay put a hand on her arm. ‘I’m sorry, that was clumsy of me. What I meant is that you can have another husband. You can love again. Hilary can never have another son. You can move on and enjoy a whole new life. She can’t. She simply can’t.’
‘She could if she wanted to,’ Nina said, stubbornly, not wanting to relinquish the angry hurt she felt.
‘That’s the whole point,’ Lindsay said gently. ‘She doesn’t want to.’
To her relief, Nina was positioned at the opposite end of the line-up from Hilary and as soon as they were dismissed by the photographer, she hurried back to the marquee. A quartet of musicians had set up and were now providing background music. More waiting staff had materialised and were buzzing around the beautifully decorated tables making sure all was in order. For a wedding arranged at the last minute, thought Nina, there didn’t seem to be any corners cut. Goodness knows how Tigs andFabian had done it. Maybe there had been a cancellation which they’d been able to take advantage of.
It took Nina a while to locate Jakob amongst the guests. Like bees to a honeypot, the pack of young girls she’d earlier encountered had him surrounded, and when he spotted Nina over their heads there was no mistaking the relief in his face.
‘There you are, babes,’ he said, reaching out a hand to her, ‘I thought you were never coming back!’
As one, the girls turned to see who he was talking to and then reluctantly parted to let Nina through. She heard one of them mutter, ‘I wouldn’t mind being in her shoes.’ Followed by another saying, ‘Some have all the luck.’
‘Seriously, that was the longest moment of my life,’ he said when the girls had wandered off to hunt down some new prey.
‘I’m sure it wasn’t anything you couldn’t handle,’ Nina said with a smile.‘Babes.’
He cringed. ‘You didn’t mind me saying that, did you? Was that very wrong?’
