‘Why?’
‘If you’d read my emails and texts you’d know.’ He turned away from her.
‘I didn’t want to read a lot of lies and excuses. We both know what we did in London was wrong. It should never have happened, and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself.’ She moved round so she could look at him. ‘But I at least had the benefit of doubt.Youknew you were in a relationship.’
‘What?’ He seemed confused.
‘You know what a relationship is? It’s when you commit to each other and don’t sleep with other people!’
‘Cass, what are you talking about?’
‘Am I suddenly speaking a different language? Is gobbledygook coming out of my mouth? It all sounds perfectly comprehensible to me!’
‘But what you’re saying makes no sense. Who am I supposed to be in a relationship with?’
‘With Becca! You’re in a relationship with Becca. And if you’ve broken up it must be very recent!’
‘What?’ Ranulph said again. He took hold of her shoulders and then let them go again. ‘Cass, Becca and I had a thing when we were both students; since then we’ve just been friends. Where are you getting your information from?’
For the first time since the beginning of their conversation, Cass suddenly felt less sure of her ground although she still thought he was lying. ‘Facebook. There are pictures of you with your arm round Becca. Her status is “in a relationship”.’
‘I don’t do Facebook.’
‘If you did, you’d know how revealing it is!’
‘It can’t reveal what doesn’t exist. I’m not in a relationship with Becca! She’s happily coupled up with someone else. Doesn’t Facebook tell you that?’
Cass shrugged. Her heart was beating hard and she felt she didn’t know what to believe any more. She’d been so certain and now she wasn’t.
Ranulph sighed. He suddenly looked tired andstrained. ‘I’ve been in love with you for a long time, Cass. Ever since I first saw you on that ferry in Scotland. You were lost in your own world and I thought how beautiful you were. I know it sounds ridiculous, but there it is.’ He cleared his throat. ‘That’s why making love to you in London felt completely right, because itwasright. There’s only ever been you.’
Cass looked at him in confusion. ‘Then why didn’t you say so at the time?’
He looked away from her and then out to sea. ‘I was frightened that you weren’t ready for me to tell you I loved you. I just wanted to go with the moment. I would certainly have told you in the morning, but you weren’t there.’
He took another breath. ‘I see now that I should have declared myself sooner. I suppose I thought my feelings were pretty clear.’
Hearing all this from him didn’t feel as convincing as it should have, somehow. ‘Rescuing me from Austin was amazing and I’ll always be grateful, but hitting a man doesn’t exactly say “I love you”.’
Ranulph swallowed and looked around him again as if seeking help to make her understand. Then he took a deep breath. ‘Cass, I really want you to know how much I love you but I see that I made a major mistake and I didn’t know that mistake would make you cut me out of your life.’ He paused. ‘Can I have a second chance? Please? Can I prove my love for you while we’re here together, in Dominica?’
Cass felt her feelings had been through an emotional blender. She had been so positive Ranulph and Beccawere together, she couldn’t just accept that this wasn’t true, and that she was the one he loved. Maybe time was what she needed? She didn’t speak.
‘Or maybe,’ Ranulph went on, ‘we could just be friends? Give you a bit more time to get used to the idea that it’s you I love? If you don’t – can’t – accept that before we leave, then it will be me who has to accept it. But I want a chance to prove my feelings. I came to Dominica to sort this out, to tell you how I feel. I’m not going to give up without a fight!’ He smiled ruefully. ‘Although I hope it doesn’t have to be with Austin!’
Cass took a few breaths to think about this. She’d spent almost every moment since she first met him believing she was in love with Ranulph. Now it seemed he was in love with her. It should be the best news she’d ever got and yet, somehow, she just felt numb.
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
‘Can we change things up a little tomorrow?’ asked Sylvie. ‘I’d really love to travel with Bastian, and Ranulph can drive Cass anywhere she’d like to go.’
Ranulph laughed. ‘I think you’ll find that Cass is more than capable of driving herself. After the hurricane she was driving Bastian’s pick-up all over the place, on very damaged roads.’ He smiled, a little diffident. ‘So where would you like to go, Cass? Now that you have the choice?’
Cass didn’t have to think. ‘I’d love to visit the family who rescued me during the second hurricane.’
Delphine, who had cleared the dishes after dinner, put down a bowl of bananas and some locally made chocolate for dessert. ‘If you’re going up there you might need a shovel and perhaps a rope. The road hasn’t been repaired.’ She paused. ‘You might need a man, too.’
Cass laughed. ‘In which case, I’d better take one. Ranulph? Are you up for it?’
