But he wouldn’t abandon Electra either, thought Lizzie. ‘So I’m safe for now? Honestly, I left him anote with Vanessa saying I didn’t want to see him. He shouldn’t have come here.’
‘Yes he should,’ said David firmly. ‘He’s honourable, like I said.’
‘It’s Lizzie who wants to cut herself off from him. She wants to disappear into the night and never see him again,’ said Meg.
‘And I won’t. Hugo thinks I’m in Scotland so he won’t come here again.’ Lizzie’s churning stomach began to settle, and she swung her legs round so she was sitting, not lying. ‘Everything is all right.’
‘No, it’s not all right!’ said Meg, indignantly. ‘You can’t stay in the house until you have the baby. He will see you somewhere, you can guarantee it.’
‘Meggie’s right,’ said David. ‘London is a big city but if there’s someone you want to avoid you will meet them, sure as eggs is eggs.’
Lizzie felt sick all over again. She pushed her fingers through her hair so it stuck up in spikes. ‘What should I do?’
She hadn’t really expected an answer but Meg said, ‘Well, my mother works in a school as a matron. They always need assistants.’
‘It would be live-in?’
‘Yes. But once you really start to show, you’d have to leave,’ said Meg. ‘Unless you quickly have an affair with one of the schoolmasters and then he can marry you and make everything all right.’
Everyone looked at Meg in horror. ‘That wasn’t a serious suggestion, but it’s what people do, isn’t it? I’m not saying you should do it, Lizzie.’ Meg paused. ‘Unless you fell in love, of course. And then you’d have to tell him.’
‘I rather think that ship has sailed, Meggie,’ said David. ‘And I doubt Lizzie is the type to be able to fall in love again so quickly. You’ll have to tell Hugo, my love. None of the other options are going to be at all pleasant.’
Lizzie found herself wanting to cry and realised that being pregnant felt just the same as being due for a period when she could start to cry for no reason and at very little notice. Although this time she had a reason.
‘More toast?’ said Meg.
Lizzie shook her head. Meg liked to feed people; it made her feel better. ‘No, thank you, sweetie, although that was delicious.’ Lizzie steeled herself to ask a question. ‘Meg, what did your mother do when she had you as a baby, and was a widow?’
‘Well,’ said Meg. ‘It was very hard, I know. A bit easier for her as a widow. Even then, because my father was killed after the war people assumed she’d never had a husband. She suffered a lot of unkindness. But she managed to get live-in jobs. Of course we’d do everything we could to support you—’ Meg looked at David and Alexandra, who noddedfervently. ‘Although you might end up finding it would be best to have the baby adopted.’
Lizzie wanted to cry again. I don’t think I could bear to do that, she thought. ‘This being pregnant lark is no picnic, is it?’ she said out loud, trying to sound as if she didn’t care.
Possibly hearing the tears in her voice, David said, ‘I know you think they will be desperately upset, but shouldn’t you tell your parents? They may look after you, and love having a little grandchild without the bother of a wedding and a son-in-law?’
‘David,’ said Lizzie, ‘I don’t know if I’ve told you this already – probably only about a hundred times – but my mother has been planning my wedding ever since she was told she had a baby girl. They care terribly what the neighbours think and their daughter having an illegitimate baby—’
‘—would kill them,’ David finished for her. ‘I know. You said. But women love babies! I’ve never seen a woman who doesn’t go all soppy when they see one.’
‘You haven’t seen a woman who hasn’tpretendedto go all soppy when they see one,’ Alexandra corrected him. ‘Babies aren’t for everyone. They make a lot of noise and are always damp. And, personally, I never know what to do with them on the few occasions I’ve been given one to hold.’ She sent Lizzie an apologetic smile. ‘But I will make ahuge effort with your baby, Lizzie. That will be different: it will be our baby, like Clover is our dog.’
‘Thank you,’ said Lizzie weakly, not sure a baby and a dog were quite the same thing.
For the next two weeks Lizzie tried to keep herself busy as she waited for the day when she could ring up the doctor and find out the results of her pregnancy test.
She mended some ancient linen sheets for David, turning them ‘sides to middle’ so he could sell them on his stall. She helped Meg make dainty canapés, cutting grapes in half, piping cream cheese on to biscuits (something she became quite good at), and whatever fiddly, time-consuming thing Meg needed doing for her boss’s catering business. Apparently they could charge a huge amount for these salty little morsels. But nothing worked. No matter what her hands were doing, her mind kept turning over her problems.
The day before her results were due, she was alone in the house when the doorbell rang and kept on ringing, even though she tried to ignored it. Eventually she had to give in and respond. She went up from the kitchen to open the front door, terrified in case it was Hugo.
It was her parents. ‘Get your things, Elizabeth,’ said her father. ‘You’re coming with us.’
Lizzie was allowed to write her housemates a note, to stop them thinking she’d been kidnapped, but she hadn’t been given long to put her things into a bag before she was hustled out of the house and into the car. Lizzie sat in back seat, biting her lips, clenching her hands and twisting her fingers, desperate not to cry. Her parents hardly said a word to each other and nothing to her. Although they hadn’t said as much there was no doubt that they had found out the results of her test, which also meant she was definitely pregnant.
When they got into the house they restrained themselves no longer.
‘Elizabeth!’ said her father, almost shouting. ‘How could you do this to us?’
‘After all we’ve done for you?’ said her mother. ‘You’ve been our beloved only child and this is how you reward us?’
