“Here to finally tell me what’s going on, Mini-Dite?” he asked, shrugging off his stiff court jacket and leaving him in a teal button-up shirt with silver embroidery running along the edges.
I tried to smile, but it just wouldn’t come.
“Yes, Veri,” I said morosely. “I am.”
He frowned in concern and took the few steps needed to reach me, grabbing my hand. I looked down at where he held it, tears rising to my eyes as I wondered if this would be the last time he’d touch me in such a way.
He led me to the sofa, each of us taking a seat. With the round shape, we were facing directly across from each other, and the closeness was setting my nerves further on edge.
“I’m going to ask you to let me tell the full story before you say anything,” I requested, my eyes closing as I gathered myself. He hadn’t let go of my hand, and the soft press of his fingers and palm against my own sent all the blood there racing straight to my heart.
“Jacinth,” he called softly, his tone achingly sweet, and I wanted to bottle the sound to remember it forever. The knowledge that someone cared for me in such a way was so strange and yet so beautiful. And all it could take is a few words to have it all torn away.
I opened my eyes, meeting the beautiful teal ones staring back at me. His elbows went to his knees, enabling him to lean further toward me. The hand not holding mine went to my cheek, stroking the skin there as I tried to imprint everything about this moment into my memory.
“I want you to know that this story does turn around, so I beg of you, Azurill, let me get this out,” I begged Azurill, who looked more disconcerted by the second, but he nodded his confirmation.
“My name is—” My voice caught. I hadn’t spoken it aloud since I was a child, and the truth trembled on the tip of my tongue. “My name is Linnea Jacinth Marit.”
Azurill pulled back immediately, his eyes blown wide as he opened his mouth to speak, but I held up a hand, a plea for him to remain silent. He closed his mouth, his lips twisting, and I fisted my hands in my skirts, trying to keep myself together even as I wanted to rattle apart.
“My father was Lord Elros of Pearl Court, and I was the noble daughter of Pearl, until that night.” I shivered, trying to repress the memory so recently awakened. “I was a little girl at the time, but my guard woke me from my sleep, and he immediately shushed me, telling me that I was in danger and needed to remain quiet. I nearly screamed as he dragged the already dead body of my cousin, Peony, to my bed, tucking her in as if she were me.”
Azurill appeared as if he’d seen a ghost, but I forced myself to continue.
“He tried to run with me, to get me to safety, but the attackers were closing in. We entered the living room, and I saw the bodies of my entirefamily laid out before me. If I thought seeing Peony’s body was bad, seeing the bloody remains of my parents’ bodies, their hands reaching out for each other from across the room…”
My words caught, and I bit my lip to prevent tears from leaking out. Azurill’s eyes were wide as he digested this part of my story, and recognition shone in them as I spoke about the placement of their bodies.
“I tried to scream, to cry, to fight my way to them,” I smiled sadly, “but my guard was too loyal for his own good, and he was determined to save me. When he heard the men coming back, he hid me in a closet and told me to run the second I had the chance. To not stop running until I was safe.” I couldn’t stop the tears from trailing down my cheeks, and I didn’t even bother to wipe them away.
“I watched through a crack in the door as they killed him, his body falling to the floor to join everyone else I loved. Once the attackers finally left, I followed his directions. I ran—and I haven’t stopped running since that night.” I admitted that truth to both of us at the same time. I hadn’t ever stopped, had never thought it safe enough to. I thought I’d found a life I could live with on the streets, but I’d been fooling myself for years. Grasping onto whatever lies I had to so I could convince myself everything was fine.
It was never fine; it was a forest fire.
“I had nowhere to go, no money to buy food. I was slowly starving, scared, and alone. My resentment grew andgrew. I finally found someone to help me, a woman named Ula who’d lived on the streets all her life, who taught me how to survive. How to steal, how to lie, how to keep myself alive and one step ahead of everyone else. I believed that if anyone ever found out who I was…”
I trailed off, meeting his eyes for a moment before continuing. “That you would have me killed.”
He reared back in shock, his mouth gaping open, and I looked away, unable to take the sight right now.
“You see, the men who attacked my family, they hailed the High King,” I turned my eyes back to him, letting him see the sad truth within them. “They said he didn’t want a drop of Marit blood left alive.”
Azurill’s eyebrows furrowed as he cocked his head, trying to work it out.
“I spent years wanting to get vengeance for my family, a chance to finally sleep peacefully and not see their broken bodies in my dreams,” I cried, my head falling forward and my hair curtaining my face. “And I finally got thechance. Ula fell sick, and we didn’t have the gems to help her. I went to Ruby Court since we were close by, and I figured the banking capital of Gemaria would be the best place to find some dumb man I could steal coins or gems from.”
“One man in a tavern mentioned to his friend that they’d found a fault in Lord Carnelian’s vault security. They were fixing it soon, but it was now possible to break into. I traded with him for a map and stole into the castle. But I was caught and brought before Lord Carnelian. He offered me a way to get out alive, and a way to save Ula—but more importantly, he offered me a chance at vengeance.”
I thought back, recognizing now the clues I’d missed before about Carnelian. He’d played me the entire time, and I’d missed it. Azurill’s face had gone hard, and I could tell he was working to keep any discernible emotions locked down. He didn’t want to give a thing away. I sighed miserably, but continued my explanation.
“He said he was working on a way to take you out and become High King himself,” I told him, gravely serious, worry lacing my words. “I agreed to join the competition and win, where I’d poison you the night of and then disappear. Carnelian would take over, he’d heal Ula for me, and I’d have vengeance for my family.” My lips pursed as I thought about how stupid I had been, letting that horrid lord lead me down this path.
“But I realized quickly that who you were didn’t match the image I’d always had of you.” I admitted softly, “That you were hardly the boogie man who’d invaded my dreams for so long.” His lips twitched down into a frown at that, but I kept going.
“I began to doubt more and more, especially when you spoke of what happened to my family, and then Carnelian slipped up. He mentioned me getting vengeance for my family, but I’d never told him about my family at all.” I frowned, furious anger racing through my body. I took a deep breath, looking up at Azurill through watery eyes.
“I was so torn, Azurill.” Tears choked my words, and I cleared my throat to continue. “I thought you were responsible for ripping my entire life away from me, but I found myself so drawn to you despite it all. You were charming and caring, fiercely protective and generous. And I felt myself tearing apart by inches as I fell for a man I thought had committed such an absoluteatrocityagainst my family.”
