“Well…” Faiza began, her turquoise brows rising. “Azcanbe a flirt. He certainly enjoys entertaining women, but I can’t say I’ve ever seen him actually show interest in one beyond that. We’ve often teased him about how fast his interest fades.”
“So the fact that he’s beenentertainingour girl here since day one should say something, no?” Amatista wiggled her amethyst brows, making me giggle at her ridiculousness.
I found myself thankful for the two as they debated back and forth. I’d never had friends before, or I hadn’t since childhood at least. There was only Ula, who was more of a mentor than a friend. We certainly never sat together talking about boys or our feelings. Any other girls I met on the street were tobe viewed as competition. For the best spot to sleep, for any food we could find, it was all too much of a battle for friendships to form.
Everyone knew you had to look out for yourself above all.
I had thought it would be the same here, especially as it wasliterallya competition, but Faiza and Amatista had both surprised me. Neither had any interest in being queen or Azurill’s wife, and both seemed to want to be actual friends. They were even rooting for me to win!
It made me feel blessed and cursed all at once.
Warm friendship versus the idea of their reactions later. The betrayal might gut me just as much as them.
I no longer knew what the best path forward was, and the uncertainty was eating me alive.
I had to get vengeance for my family, but I wasn’t quite as sure anymore that my parents would evenwantthis. Or if I could even do it. Could I look at Azurill and watch him drink his end?
Would Carnelian kill me and Ula both if I didn’t?
“What about you, Tista?” I asked her, countering her teasing and trying to distract myself from the heavy thoughts assailing me.
“What about me?” She blinked innocently, taking a sip of her wine.
I narrowed my eyes at her playfully, “Oh, don’t play coy. Who’s the lucky man at home that you’d give up being queen for?”
Her smile fell as her eyes shot to Faiza and then to her lap. She played with her fingers for a moment, a nervous tick I’d seen before.
“I won’t say anything,” Faiza promised, grabbing one of her hands. “I have my own prospect I’d do near anything to be with if I could.”
I grabbed her other hand, creating a link between us all, “And I have no reason to judge.”
‘You can trust me’sat at the tip of my tongue, but the words felt like ashes in my mouth, gritty and course, and like they didn’t belong. I could wish it was true, but I knew my lies and my mission meant it wasn’t to be.
“It’s not a man,” she finally whispered, looking up with teary amethyst eyes.
“So? Who cares?” I asked, squeezing her hand for comfort.
“Everyone does,” She laughed incredulously, “My father. My mother. The court.” Her lips trembled, “I love her so much, and she loves me, but keeping to the shadows while my father sells me off will be the end of us before long, I know it. She deserves better than to be someone’s dirty little secret.”
Tears fell down her face, and I quickly pulled her into a hug, Faiza taking her other side cautiously. The two hadn’t been friends until I brought them together, so I was happy to see her freely offer her support as well.
“There must be a way,” I murmured to myself as I petted her purple hair and tried to soothe her. “Commoners are allowed to marry the same sex, and while I understand the nobility has heirs to consider, you’re not even in line to inherit as a woman. There’s no reason to deny you. Not beyond greed.”
“Maybe when you’re queen, you can make my father and the court allow it,” she whispered back, though her hopeless tone said otherwise.
My heart clenched in my chest, and tears came to my own eyes. I wasn’t sure if this was the reason she befriended me, perhaps thinking it the best shot for her future, or if that had only just occurred to her. After all, she hadn’t wanted to admit what was going on at first.
But either way, she deserved better. A chance to be with the woman she loved. And I had no way to tell her that I would be the last person able to help after this was over.
We were calledto the throne room several days later to find out who would be eliminated. My palms were clammy, and I couldn’t seem to quiet my nerves. There was every chance my fuck up could spell doom for my chances.
Amatista grabbed my hand, squeezing it in support as we stood before the throne, waiting for Azurill to appear. Faiza caught my eye from the crowd, sending me a smile that I tried to reciprocate, but it quickly faded as I watched Carnelian force his way to the front. I immediately looked away, hoping he didn’t notice.
I didn’t have to ask to know how unhappy he’d be about me making connections among the court. His plans were firm and unwavering, while mine were crumbling. I had to be careful to maintain the veneer I always held with him and avoid facing his wrath.
When Azurill was finally announced and he made his way to the throne, his eyes locked with mine for a moment that felt like an eternity. I got lost in the swirling pools of teal that held layers I found myself desperate to unravel,needingto know the truth of him.
“Thank you, everyone,” he began with a charming smile. “For joining us for this elimination round of the Diamond Queen Competition!” The crowd cheered for a moment before he continued.
