I sighed loudly, covering my eyes with my hands as I breathed in and out, trying to calm my racing heart. Just one look at Calix had the damn thing beating out of control.
I fought my blankets and wormed my way out of my bed. I stretched out my muscles, only to find, to my great surprise, that they didn’t hurt the way they usually did. I bent over, stretching to touch my toes, and found my back didn’t scream in protest.
I blinked in surprise. The pain had been with me my whole life. The life that had been spent hidden in a mortal shell. Another thing whoever did this to me had to answer for.
* * *
I mademy way out to the training ring, determined to get an early start. My rage had taken a back seat to my grief and confusion, but it was an ever-steady hum in the background. I wanted to tear Cyrus to pieces for what he did to me. For what he was doing to everyone.
But for now, I let myself admire the sunrise cresting over the palace as I entered the yard, rarely awake enough to appreciate it first thing. I’d slept from mid-afternoon to morning, so after fourteen hours of sleep, I was awake and ready to go.
I went to the swords, only to pause as I found Lilith sharpening a blade. Her long brown hair was tied in a braid down her back, and she wore the same armor I’d donned this morning. She looked up as my shadow reached her, and a smile took over her face as she jumped up and pulled me into a hug.
I breathed out and hugged her back. There had been moments I wasn’t certain I’d ever see any of them again. I’d hoped, but hope was such a new thing for me, that I often still didn’t trust it.
“I couldn’t believe it when they told me.” Lilith pulled back and took me in, from the tips of my pointed ears to my feet.
“I still can’t really believe it.” I smiled wryly, and, ever empathetic, Lilith could see my desperate need for distraction.
“Come on, let’s spar. You look like you could use it.” She smiled softly, head tilting toward the training ring.
“Please.” I nodded in relief, needing to get out of my head for a bit, only to be completely taken aback when we got going.
“There you go! Look at you!” Lilith beamed as I surged under her arm and came up behind her, my sword at her throat. I blinked quickly in surprise.
“Fae speed, I guess. I’d forgotten.” I chuckled at myself. This huge change that rocked my life had occurred, and I hadn’t even considered the abilities I would now have beyond my magic.
Lilith smiled softly, “You need to focus on the positives. Your speed, your strength, those are only a couple of the things you now have.”
I nodded in agreement, but couldn’t force myself to verbalize it. I merely lifted my sword arm in invitation, and our blades crashed against each other once more. Parrying and blocking until Lilith managed to knock the blade out of my hand with a combination of movements so fast, I could only see them thanks to my newly improved eyesight.
Her blade was leveled at my neck, and my own sword fell from my hand as I froze in horror, unable to breathe as my blood gushed from my neck, my life draining away. I collapsed to the ground and grappled for my throat, my hands clumsy with fear and shaking from the terror of my neck splitting open once more.
“Breathe, Asteria.” Lilith’s worried voice sounded far away, as if I was hearing her from underwater. “You’re okay. You’re okay.” She repeated over and over as she rubbed my back.
It took several minutes for me to gain a solid breath in and realize I wasn’t bleeding out. My throat wasn’t gushing my lifeblood onto the floor; it was just a memory coming back to haunt me. I’d never reacted so strongly to something so simple before. I couldn’t help wondering if what had happened had completely warped my mind.
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what…” I trailed off, clearing my throat in embarrassment. What a pathetic Fae I made.
“There’s nothing to apologize for,” Lilith swore softly. “I can’t imagine how frightening that was for you. And knowing you,” she gave me a knowing look, “You’ve been trying to bury it and move on.”
I flinched. It felt like her words tore off the invisible armor I kept around my emotions to protect myself. When your emotions are erratic, sometimes burying them is the only thing that helps you make it from day to day.
“You’ll have to deal with what happened, Asteria.” At the frantic shake of my head, she soothed me, running her hand down my back. “It doesn’t need to be now. It can be on your own time. But we all understand and know how it is, I promise you that. It may not seem it, but we all have our issues.” She smiled softly, despite her next words.
“Trauma is like a ghost that haunts you, and you can’t decide when it will pop up to frighten you again. But if you face down your ghost, oftentimes, you can also take control of it.”
* * *
The next twodays were taken up with the girls trying to keep me from wallowing or freaking out and, alternatively, chasing Calix away so I had time to come to terms with the changes in my life.
But staring at myself in the mirror, taking in the now pointed tips of my ears and the way my eyes now truly looked like a bright blue sky, I knew I had to get myself together. I couldn’t continue trying to run from what had happened to me.
It was time to get on with my life. Too much was left to do, and I knew I needed to get back to dealing with what we all knew was coming.
War.
With what happened in Sunset and Dusk Kingdoms, we all knew that the time had come. Soon, we would need to take the fight to Cyrus. The humans of Celesterra were depending on us and the balance of the entire world was at stake. If we failed to fix it, the magic would soon fade entirely from Celesterra.
