Relief and gratitude filled her as she went past everyone at the table and said, “Hello, hey, hi,” until she managed to sink into the couch next to Joey. She’d only taken one bite of pizza when Codi came down the hall with the baby.
Joey sucked in her breath, shoved her plate at herboyfriend, and jumped to her feet. “Oh, baby raccoons, there he is,” she said. “Can I have him first?”
Codi grinned and passed the little boy to her. Joey glowed with a soft white light as she gazed down at a tiny bundle in her arms. She moved back over to the couch and sat down, sinking into Adam’s side carefully. He put his arm around her and balanced both of their plates on his lap.
“Look at him,” Joey said, her voice soft. “He is so beautiful.”
She looked up at Adam, and Bailey had no idea how long they’d been dating, but they sure seemed close. Her heart ached for that kind of closeness, for someone who knew her so well and wanted to take care of her, who knew what was important to her and made it important to him too.
Joey ran the back of her finger down the side of Matthew’s face, and the baby simply gazed up at her with eyes made mostly of pupil. Bailey had had very little experience with newborns, at least of the human variety, but she blinked and her reality glitched again.
This wasn’t her baby that she had just delivered and gazed down on before she gave him away, but she remembered OJ’s newborn eyes all the same.
She expected the pain to crash over her like a tidal wave, pinch through her heart, and make her breath come in gasps, but it didn’t. She finished her piece of pizza and dusted her hands together while conversations and laughter surrounded her. Then, seeing as how she was the only other woman in the room besides Georgia and Codi, she looked at Joey and said, “Can I hold him just for a minute, and then I’ll go.”
“Of course,” Joey said, as if this were the most natural thing in the world.
Bailey knew it wasn’t, and she knew that God had given every member of the Young family a heart made of gold and marshmallow. Joey transferred the tiny baby into Bailey’s arms, and she gazed down at him as well. He squirmed and grunted, and she smiled and shushed him as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
She wasn’t sure if all the conversations around her had stopped, or if everything in her mind had simply silenced to be in the pureness of this moment. “You are a beautiful baby,” she said, and she could see the same sloped nose in Bryce’s son that she saw in OJ.
Matthew had wispy white hair across the top of his head while remaining bald on the sides, and Bailey smiled at it as she whisked her fingers through it gently.
“You got a lot of hair here, bud. What are you going to do with all that hair?”
The baby blinked in a slow way, as if he were the robot. Bailey leaned down and pressed her lips to his delicate forehead. She’d been stitching together pieces of her life for a while now, and she felt like she’d done a good enough job to live her daily life without the massive and crushing regret, guilt, and shame she’d once carried.
She looked up and found both Codi and Bryce sitting on the love seat kitty-corner to her. Their eyes locked on her and Matthew. “He is wonderful,” she said, her voice tightening and pitching up at the same time. Tearsflooded her eyes, and she suddenly remembered the card that she’d brought.
She stood and passed the baby to Bryce. “I have something for you, and then I need to go.”
“You don’t need to go, Bay,” he said.
Codi, who’d surely put up with the irritation of having Bailey in Bryce’s life, looked at her as well. “You really don’t,” she said. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you want.”
Bailey nodded and fished the card out of her purse. “I’ll just leave it here for you,” she said. “For when you’re not so busy.” She set it on the entertainment center across the room from them and turned back to face the love seat.
“I do have to go. I’m picking up some meat for my mother from the smoke shop up here, and they close soon.”
“All right,” Bryce said, and he transferred Matthew back to Codi’s arms.
“I’ll take him,” Georgia said, and she she squeezed herself into the end of the love seat where Bryce and Codi sat.
Bailey went to get her paper plate, so as to not leave any mess behind for Codi, but Bryce took it from her and tossed it on the table. “Let’s go out the back.”
“I don’t need you to walk me out,” she said.
“It’s fine.” He opened the door and went in front of her.
“Your whole family is here,” she said as she joined him on the back deck, and she pulled the door closed behind her. “He really is beautiful, Bryce. I’m really happy for you and Codi.”
“Thank you.” Bryce smiled at her as she joined him at his side. “I know it’s hard for you to come, Bailey. You don’t have to feel like you need to.”
“OJ invited me,” Bailey said with a sigh. “And you know I can’t tell him no.” She gave a light laugh. “Heck, I diagnosed aduckfor him yesterday, and every injured and abandoned animal that comes into my clinic, I think first of telling him about them. I know he would take them all, and nurture them back to health, and love them.”
Bryce chuckled. “He sure would. That kid loves animals.”
Bailey’s throat tightened, and she watched the branches sway in the wind. “It was good for me to see Matthew,” she said to the sky. “I’m getting better, Bryce, I really am.”
