She took a sip of her coffee and flipped her phone over, tapping to get to Adam’s string. He had not texted that morning, and she wondered if he was still in Jackson Hole, still cleaning up the mess in the warehouse.
When he’d shown up at the apartment yesterday, he’d been wearing slacks, of course, and a pale yellow polo. She had no idea if he’d packed a bag, but the man had a credit card. Jackson was a massive tourist destination.
Joey finished her breakfast of peanut butter crackers and coffee and got up to get her shoes. She was going to go to church today all by herself because she was strong and capable and wonderful and amazing.
She didn’t have to have someone at her side to do the things she wanted to do—and shewantedto have a relationship with God and Jesus Christ. ShewantedHim to know that she could do hard things so she could feel His spirit.
She stepped into a pair of white heels and put on herabsolute favorite coat—the one that made her feel the brightest and shiniest: her pink, glittery, puffy coat.
She looked at the scarves hanging on the hooks that Daddy had put beside the door, and she chose the one that Adam had given her for Christmas. With that, it almost felt like he was with her.
Properly bundled against the weather, she left the basement apartment and got in her car. “You’ve been good to me,” she said as the vehicle started. “And I don’t want you to think I’m not appreciative, but my next major purchase is going to be a new vehicle.”
She smiled at the thought, now knowing that if she needed some extra money, she could earn it.
Her pies had done very well, and while she wasn’t sure if she would be able to continue to sell them throughout the year, she could certainly try. She’d ended up doing eighty-four for Christmas, and her forearms ached just thinking about rolling out all that pie dough. But she’d done it with Adam acting as her chocolate croissant errand boy—a fact that made her heart flop and tears press into her eyes.
She’d text him back when she parked at the church. Yes, that was what she would do.
She didn’t want to break up with him, and he’d apologized twice already. She had been angry, and when the last jar of the spaghetti sauce that she had worked on that fall had been dropped and she’d lost it, Joey had cried.
She’d vowed not to cry on moving day, but it had still happened. She told herself the same thing that she told Adam yesterday—not everything could be fixed, and she didn’t need to be fixed anyway. It was okay that she got mad sometimes. It was okay that she cried sometimes, just like it was okay that she went to church alone sometimes.
“But overall,” she whispered to herself so as not to have her voice be so definitive. “You don’t want to do everything by yourself.”
She turned into the church parking lot and went up and down a couple of rows until she found a spot. She parked facing the church, the tall steeple rising above the cars blocking the lower level.
“You want a life with Adam because…you love him.”
Joey didn’t like that it had taken his absence yesterday for her to finally realize that she was in love with him, but it had. She knew better than most that God worked in mysterious ways, and perhaps He had caused that roof in Jackson Hole to collapse, so that Adam would have to choose something over her.
A sense of peace filled her, though she didn’t expect it to. She felt like everything and everyone had been chosen over her for most of her life, butAdamhad always put her first.
“That was why it hurt so much yesterday,” she said, just now realizing it. “But you can’t always come first.”
The fact that Adam had stopped by her apartment and hung his head and apologized before rushing off to take care of his problem told Joey that he wanted to put her first in all things, but in thatone thingyesterday, he hadn’t been able to.
A smile lifted the corners of her mouth. “But hewantedto.”
She needed to go inside before she would be late, and Joey finally turned off her car, because the cold would force her in the building sooner rather than later. She took a steeling breath before she got out of the car, because if she did it outside, her lungs would freeze together.
Then she stepped out and started walking toward the church with strong, sure steps, feeling more like the bold, brave, beautiful woman she’d been trying to find since she’d returned to Coral Canyon.
CHAPTER
FORTY-TWO
Adam’s joints ached from how hard he gripped the steering wheel. He’d really pushed his car a lot the last couple of days, taking the winding roads from Coral Canyon to Jackson and back. He’d also worked in dirty water, snow, and ice for ten hours yesterday, and that certainly hadn’t helped. His lack of exercise in the past several months meant his whole body hurt, despite the painkillers he’d downed with an early morning cup of coffee from a convenience store.
He finally pulled into his garage, noting he literally had twenty minutes before he had to leave again. He glanced at his phone, noting that Joey still had not returned his texts from last night, and he left his phone to charge as he ran inside to get ready for church.
She had been at his side on his first day back to church,and he would absolutely not miss walking in with her this morning—her first day going to church alone.
“Doesn’t matter if she texts you back or not,” he muttered to himself as he hurried into the shower. He soaped and scrubbed the fastest he ever had, praying the whole time that he would be able to get to the church before Joey walked in.
“Bless my car to run well,” he said into the shower stream. “Bless me to be aware of other drivers. Bless me to park close to her. Bless her to have a forgiving heart.”
Adam needed that last one more than anything, and he hurried to redress, grab the first tie he saw, and stuff his feet into his shiny church shoes. Then he was on the road again, back to Coral Canyon this time, praying he wouldn’t get behind any trucks or slow drivers, begging God to open a parking space exactly where he needed it to be, and pleading with the Lord that he would know exactly what to say and do to get Joey to take him back, because he did not like the fact that she had not texted him in return.
