“You weren’t answering my calls, and you weren’t at home.I came here.I’m sorry.I should have told you about the room mix-up.”
“I felt so stupid, having her tell me something you should have told me.She was enjoying every embarrassing moment of my ignorance.I was blindsided, you made me look like a fucking fool.I don’t like that shit.”
“I know, and it’s my fault; she was trying to get to you by lying about what happened.”
“She came sashaying into your office like a centerfold stepping out of aPlayboymagazine.I felt like Humpy Dumpty.Ilooklike Humpy Dumpty.”He takes my hand and runs a finger under my chin.
“No, you don’t.You’re beautiful.”
“She’s beautiful, how am I to compete with that?”I bite down on my lower lip and move his hand from under my chin.He holds on to my other hand when I try to move it, pulling me closer to him.
“There’s no competition, you have me.More importantly, I have you.”
“Paige is successful and accomplished, and I’m still not sure what I want to do with the rest of my life.I felt inferior, like I was lacking in every way.She does things that I don’t, things I can’t even attempt to try.”
“Don’t talk like this.You’re doing something she could never do.”
“What?”I ask softly.He holds my face up and looks in my eyes.
“Having our child.She could never do that.You are everything to me.She could never take your place.She needs her career to define who she is.You don’t, you define who you are; you’re strong, independent, and at the same time loving and caring and every bit as smart as she is.I love you more than you know, more than I could have imagined.If need be, I will remind you every day and every night and every time I’m making love to you and only you for the rest of my life.”
Call me a fool, I believe him.I believe he didn’t sleep with her, but there was still a kiss.I’m hurt by his lies.He didn’t trust in me to trust in him and what we have, to do the right thing by telling me the truth.Instead he chose to lie to me, leaving me open…exposed to his ex to hurt me, to hurt us.
“Baby, let’s go home.”
“I’m not coming home.Not tonight.”
“Cat, don’t do this.I know you’re angry, I know you’re hurt.Come home with me.”
“I need to think.I need…not tonight.”I can’t think with him touching me, holding me.“I don’t want to bury what I feel.I want to feel it now.I don’t want to forget it in your arms tonight and deal with it tomorrow.That’s not going to help me, and it’s not going to help us.”
“Tonight.If you’re not home by tomorrow night, I’ll be back to get you.”His lips press against my forehead, then he heaves a heavy sigh and walks out the door.
I spend the night trying to sleep but failing.I keep thinking about all the things Nick and I have been through.More than any other couple I know.We’ve made it too far to make something like this—a jealous, lying ex-girlfriend—break us up.What we sacrificed—all that I’ve sacrificed—is too much to let this break us apart.
I’ve been through too damn much.Gave up my family, having people whispering behind my back.My sister hates my guts, my brother doesn’t want anything to do with me and called me a whore.My father doesn’t have the same look in his eyes when he looks at me.The image he has of me is tarnished, like a cheap piece of silverware.And my mother doesn’t even want to be a grandmother to my child.That says it all.
I fall asleep sometime in the early morning, before the sun comes up.I spend the day with Ava, not talking about Nick.She fired her contractor for trying to rip her off.I spend most of the day helping her find a new one and listening to her talk excitedly about the still over the top baby shower I asked her not to throw.I leave Ava’s that night, early enough for Nick not to come looking for me.I’ve had time to think.I’m still upset but I love him, and I believe him.But all is not going to be forgiven so easily.I’m not going to pretend it is.
I get home and he’s waiting for me, leaning against the kitchen counter.I go into the bathroom and walk right back out.“Where’s the bed?”I stare at the huge empty space where it’s supposed to be.I walk back into the kitchen and notice something else is missing.What the hell is going on?Where’s the kitchen table?I stand in the empty spot where the table used to be, moving my hands around me in a semi-circle.Nick watches me with his arms folded across his chest.
“Nick, where’s the bed?”
“It was time for a new one.I didn’t want you thinking about my ex every time you looked at it or when we have sex.I donated it.I also got a new kitchen table.”
“You threw it out?”
He puts his hands on the counter, pushing himself off.“I burned it.”
I smile without thinking, watching him with those eyes intently on me.He takes my hand and leads me to the living room, where he sits on the arm of the couch.His arms lock around my back.His forehead presses to mine and our lips touch, he slowly rubs his lips against my slightly parted ones.I feel the familiar pull in the pit of my stomach making me ache.I close my eyes, feeling the pulse between my legs at the touch of his skin against mine and his warm breath on me.
“Don’t lie to me like that again.Don’t make me feel like that girl that’s not enough.If you do, I’m going to leave.I won’t come back.You understand me?”I swallow hard, leaning into him, my breathing uneven as he kisses my lips the tip of his tongue moving against me.I wait for him to answer, my hands resting on his arms.
“I hear you loud and crystal clear.It won’t happen again.”I open my mouth and he kisses me, sliding his soft, warm, wet tongue into my mouth, making me moan.His husky voice reaches my ear between his gentle kisses.“I love you, baby.I’m sorry I hurt you.I was wrong for not telling you, I can see that now.”
He picks me up like a feather in his arms and carries me into the guest bedroom.He undresses and makes love to me, telling me how beautiful I am.The muscles of his chest press against my back while he watches me writhing in his arms helplessly, moving against him.His hands never leave my body; holding me, he constantly tells me how much he loves me and needs me in more ways than one.Rubbing his fingers between my legs, he massages my sensitive folds.He’s deep inside me, pressed against my ass, bringing me to a satisfying end.
The air conditioner on, the sheets tangled on the bottom of the bed at our feet, and him lying back against the pillows, I sit between his legs sleepily, with my head on his chest.His hands lightly stroke my swollen belly.He moves his head so his lips are against my ear.
