“Bye.”What was that about?
The next day I go shopping with Ava and we end up at an upscale lingerie boutique.
“I don’t know, Ava, something’s off.”
“Maybe he really just misses you a lot.You haven’t been apart for a day in months.”
“I don’t know.He called me three times in one night, and the last time it was three in the morning.He didn’t sound like himself.”
“What did he sound like, if not himself?Did he sound like he was going through withdrawal?”
“What kind of withdrawal?He’s not an addict.”
“Pussy withdrawal; he’s addicted to that.”
“Shut up.”I smile and give her a playful shove.“I’m serious, Ava.”
“I’m serious too.The guy’s crazy about you.He’s never been in a relationship like this, and he has another baby on the way, after, you know—no need for me to say.”
“I think that’s part of the problem.He doesn’t say anything to me about that.”
“You think it has something to do with him and Kate losing their baby?”
I nod my head yes and look at a hot pink pleather cat suit.I promptly put it back on the rack when Ava shakes her head, laughs, and says no.“I wake up during the night with him wrapped so tight around me I can hardly breathe.It happened the first time about four weeks ago.”
“You need to talk to him, Cat.”
“He doesn’t want to talk with me about losing the baby.I brought it up once and he brushed it off.I’m hoping he will open up to me about it on his own.I don’t want to push him.”
“Then you don’t want to find out what’s going on with him.You need to push, girl.I would.”
“I feel like I’m crossing a line if I ask too much.”
“Don’t be silly, that’s your job as his girlfriend, to pry and meddle and get all up in his business until you get the answers you need.But subtly, with a smile and the right lingerie.”
“I don’t want to be that girlfriend.I don’t want to nag him to death.Ava, you know he doesn’t like that.I want him to trust me and be comfortable with me enough to be able to tell me if he’s having issues dealing with the loss of his baby or whatever it is that’s wrong.”
“Like with most men, that might not happen.I suggest you be honest and straightforward with him.Say, ‘what’s wrong with you, I don’t have time to play guessing games.I have a shit load of family drama, I’m five months pregnant, and I have to work with a bunch of noisy rug rats all day, what the hell is wrong with you?’”
“You know I would never say that to him.Nick would look at me like I’ve lost my mind.”
“Then you’re going to be the strong, silent, worrying type and wait for him to talk to you.Good luck with that.If he’s as worried about you as you think he is, he’s not going to tell you a thing.”
“Maybe I’m overthinking.You might be right, he really did miss me.I know I sure miss him.It’s hard sleeping in his bed all by myself; I’ve been sleeping with him next to me every night for three months.”
“I’m sure sleeping’s not the only thing you’ve been doing.I’m positive when he comes back you won’t be getting much sleep for days.”
I smile and look down at the lingerie on the table.She’s so right.
“Yeah, you know what I’m talking about.Your man’s coming home and you got to show him how much you missed him.”She moves around the other side of the table and holds up a black leather dominatrix outfit with what looks like a chain and whip attached at the hip.
“Are you serious, how am I going to pull that off, Ava?That’s for you.Think more Cat, less Ava.”
She holds the whip up over her head like a true cowgirl, rotating her shoulders back, and pushing her chest out.“Yeah, you’re right, I can see myself rocking this.Bow down bitch, whoosh, whoosh.”
I laugh at her dominatrix cowgirl act.I feel sorry for the man who lets her try that whip out on them.I move over to a rack and pick up a crotchless red feather slingshot-looking thing and hold it up to my body to show Ava.
“Feathers, no, put that back.That’s not you.When buying lingerie, you have to stay true to yourself.You can’t pull that off, I might be able to.In your condition, you’re going to look like a stuffed turkey trussed up with all the fixins.”
