“What do you say, can we try?”I can see her uncertainty and fear and longing; it’s written all over her face.I don’t want her to make a hasty decision, and definitely not the wrong decision.I’m going to relieve some of her tension and give her time.I made some valid points with what I had to say.
“Sleep on it and let me know when you’re ready.”
She pushes her hair behind her ears and puts her forehead against my chest.“Okay.”
We’re silent for a while before she says, “Not that it should matter, and I know you didn’t ask, but I’m telling you anyway.About Matt.”I hold my breath, not moving a muscle, waiting for her to say whatever it is she’s about to say.“I didn’t sleep with him.We didn’t have sex.”
Sheer relief washes over me.I wasn’t sure what she was going to say, but with that bastard, you never know.
I put my arms around her back and pull her closer.I close my eyes and think about the truly amazing future we could have together.
Lying next to me on her back, sleeping soundly, I watch the steady rise and fall of her chest.She moves her hand and the sheet slides down under her breasts.I gently place my hand over her stomach.I like doing this.I wasn’t able to do this when Kate was pregnant, and in the beginning, I didn’t want to.The further along she was in her pregnancy, the more I wanted to, though I knew I couldn’t because it would give her mixed signals.I’m getting a second chance after screwing things up the first time.
I feel Cat stir, then moan, and watch her slap her arm over her face to block out the light in the room.I smile at the tempting picture she makes next to me.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m nauseated.Same old, same old.”
“You need me to get you anything?”
“I would feel better if you stopped poking me in the side with your hard-on.”
“Sorry about that.Nothing I can do with you lying naked on your back beside me.”
“Control yourself, please.”
“You’re in control of it now.All you have to do is put your clothes on or take them off.”I fist the sheet in my hand and pull it down lower, to her navel.“I wish you would stop throwing yourself at me, Cat.”
“You wish.”She tugs the sheet back up over her breasts, moaning.“This is a cruel joke.I’m nauseated and horny at the same time.If this bed moves, I’m going to toss up everything in my stomach.”
“I’ll go make you some tea and toast and bring it in for you.”
“Thanks, but you don’t need to bring it in.I’m going to the bathroom, if I can peel myself off the bed.”
I kiss the underside of her arm and then her stomach, saying, “Try not to make Mommy so sick.”I turn my head to her, seeing a faint smile.Getting up, I put my pants on and head to the kitchen, a happy man.
Cat
The last time my headsaw the inside of a toilet bowl for this long I was drunk.I had to run out of the shower with soap still on me.I flush the toilet and drag myself off the floor.Putting my hands on the sink, I lean against it with my head down.I wash my mouth to get rid of the taste that’s making me sick again.I threw up everything I ate.This is the second time I’ve thrown up this morning, and I hope it’s the last.I’m wet from the shower and I’m sweating.It felt like someone was trying to yank the pit of my stomach out with a Dyson vacuum.Putting the toothbrush down, I turn around, trying to cover myself with my hands when the door opens.
“Are you sure you’re all right?”
I nod my head to let him know I am and he takes the towel, holding it out in front of me.His gaze moves to my hands, which are covering myself from him.One side of his lip turns up and he wraps the towel around me.“It’s a little late for that; I’ve seen all there is to see and I like it all.”
“Habit.”
“That’s a habit we’re going to break, immediately.”He holds the towel together around my back.“Rough morning?”
“Yes.”
“This happens every morning?”
“Sometimes.I’m hoping it’s the last morning it happens.”
“I came in to make sure you were all right.”
“I’m fine.For now.I’m going to finish taking a shower.Sorry about the floor, I’ll clean it.”
