32
LEO
“Well?” Jillie asks me when we get to her house. We split off from everyone else, and we didn’t have to say a word. They knew there were things that needed to be said between us.
I sit on the edge of her bed. “She showed me the video, and it showedeverything. Then she said if I dropped you and kept pretending to be with her, she’d keep it quiet. If I didn’t do what she said, she was going to send it to everyone she knew—including my parents.”
She huffs. “God! She infuriates me! I wish I’d slapped her anyway.”
“You did once. She won’t forget it anytime soon.”
“It’ll never be enough. How fucking dare she?!” Jillie shouts.
I know she’s pissed because she’s losing her cool. It’s not something Jillie does often. She’s the most controlled person I know—unless we’re… Hell. I don’t need to think about that now. I’ll get hard and now isnotthe time.
“So, you… what? Thought it would be a good idea to keep this from me and just go along with whatever scheme Ella came up with next?”
I’m not happy being back on this side of Jillie’s wrath. “What would you have me do?”
“Tell me!” she shouts, louder this time.
I nod. “Maybe I should have, but it was safer if I didn’t.”
“Safer.” She stands there, arms crossed, toe tapping. “Really. Do you think it would’ve been safer for you if she’d released that video and after doing so, I found outyouknew about it?”
“Well, no.” She makes me sound like an idiot and it pisses me off. “I was trying to protect you!”
“I don’t need protecting. Jesus, Leo, think about where I come from. Iknowhow to handle myself,” she informs me.
“Yeah? Maybe just this once I didn’t want you to have to take care of yourself. Maybe just this once I wanted to take care of you. Did you ever think of that?” Now I’m the one shouting. “And what were you thinking going to Damon? He’s a gangbanger! You could have gotten hurt.”
“Oh my God. Are you serious right now? I’m in more danger when I get behind the wheel of my car—and not just because I suck at driving, but because there are lots of people who suck at driving and sometimes, they run into one another.” She’s pacing now and I’m still sitting here, hands clenched into fists.
“I wanted to take care of this—to handle this. You’ve got enough going on losing your dad and now worrying about how hurt he is. What do I have to worry about? You! Just you! So, damn it, let me fucking worry and handle shit once in a while so you don’t always have to!” I growl.
She stops and looks at me, stunned. I’m not sure if it’s from what I said or from my tone, but my chest is heaving now.
“Christ Jesus, Jillie, I didn’t want her to ruin what we shared,” I tell her, standing up and pulling her into my arms. “Losing you isn’t an option. I can’t—won’t survive that. Pretending… it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”
She holds me tight, her fists holding on to the back of my shirt. “I knew you didn’t break your promise. I knew it. I think Audrey and Isla thought I was crazy, but I knew, after that night, there was no way you went back to Ella. I just couldn’t figure outwhyyou were doing what you were doing or what she had on you.”
“Yeah, well, if you hadn’t brought Damon to school—I thought I was going to have a heart attack when I saw that, by the way. I knew you needed to be told, but I couldn’t do it. I’d told Carlos and Brent. They forced it tout of me. They made sure the football team knocked me around for not telling them sooner.” I sigh. “I was going to do pretty much the same thing you’d planned to do—what you did. I was going to talk to her about what happened, record it, and tell her I’d delete mine if she deleted hers.”
Jillie snorts and steps back. “Do you really believe she’d have done that? There’s no way. She’d always have a copy to use against you. Maybe one day when you were a famous NFL player and she felt bored, she’d release the video as her version of fun.”
“Jillie,” I say, wanting her back in my arms.
“Don’t ever do that to me again. Ever. Whatever it is, you need to talk to me about it. Not knowing is worse than knowing,” she tells me.
I sit down on the bed and nod. “You’re right. You had a right to know.”
“Since my naked bits were on there along with yours, yeah, I’d say so.”
I reach for her hand and pull her to me. She sits on my knee and I cradle her close.
“I’ve missed you,” I admit.
“Good,” she teases, and I give her a soft squeeze. “I might have missed you, too. I gotta say, Leo, seeing you and Ella in the hallway was like the first day of school all over again.”
