"Never. Not for a minute."
I crouch down, resting my forehead on my knees. "You don't ever think of being with other girls?"
"No."
"Not sexually? Like, a quick fuck?"
"Tera. No. I told you…"
"Yeah, yeah, you told me. But now you're there and you’re living that life. I don't know about the rest of the guys, but I know that for sure Jesse's doing hookups. You don't get tempted?" I ask. This is something I've wondered. Does he get tempted?
"Listen, T. I don't even look. If Jesse or any of the guys hook up, they don't bring it around me."
"But they hang on you backstage. I've seen it for myself."
"They don't smell like jasmine."
That's the sweetest thing.
"Now, please, for me, go to formal."
"You're not going to let up, are you?"
"No. I want this for you, T. I know you're not going because I'm not there. Otherwise, you'd already be shopping for a gown."
"Maybe. But I have no idea who I'd even consider going with."
"Do you want me to pick someone for you?" he asks and I screw up my face.
"I don't know."
"I won't pick anyone you wouldn't want to go with."
"I…"
"It's settled. I'll find someone for you to go with to winter formal. Find a gown, Cinderella. If your Prince Charming can't be there, you'll just have to settle for some guy wrapped in tin foil instead."
I snicker at that. "We'll see who you come up with. Then I'll let you know."
"Fair enough. I have to get going. We have practice in ten minutes."
"Okay." I can't hide my disappointment.
"I'll call you tonight. It'll be late."
"Okay."
"I fucking love you, Tera."
I laugh through tears. "I fucking love you too, Xander."
He hangs up and I let a few tears fall. No pity party for me right now. That's later, in private. I wipe my tears and tilt my head back against the locker, taking a deep breath. I barely stop the squeak of surprise in time when I notice Carter standing across the hall, leaning against the lockers, watching me.
"Carter," my hand flies to my chest, "you scared me."
"Sorry. I just wanted to make sure you were okay," he replies, walking over and sitting down next to me.
I nod. "I'm okay. I just miss them."
