“If all of those hoses are capable of producing enough gasoline to fill a vehicle, does that imply that the entire location is full of gasoline?” Al asked with a frown, turning back around and settling into his seat properly.
“Um, I never thought of it like that, but yeah, I guess it does.”
“How dumb!” Al exclaimed with a laugh. “Do humans not know that gasoline can make very large and dangerous fires?”
“No, we know. It’s just that we’re really good at doing things that are dumb and dangerous.” Jude looked at Al briefly, smirking, and winked. A strange fluttering feeling filled Al’s belly, and he gulped quietly, uncertain of the cause.
“Home sweet home,” Jude announced with little fanfare a short increment of time later. He pulled his vehicle in between two others already parked along the edge of the road. As he twisted his key to stop the engine, he added, “It’s a bummer you’ve never been in a car before, because that was the best parallel parking job I’ve ever done and there’s no one here to appreciate it properly.”
Wanting Jude to feel accomplished, Al quickly said, “You parked your vehicle very well, despite it being a stupid shape and needlessly difficult to maneuver. You are extremely competent, and I am proud of you.”
Jude searched Al’s face with an unreadable expression, his keys jingling softly as he fiddled with them in his hands. Finally, he cracked a small smile and said, “Thanks. Your English is getting better. Guess you’re pretty competent, too.”
That fluttering feeling returned, this time accompanied by a bizarre warmth on his cheeks. He had no chance to discern the meaning of it all, however, because with a click of his tongue, Jude was springing into action, undoing his seat belt, opening his car door, and beckoning Al to follow. Pushing the feelings away, Al did as he was told.
The outside of Jude’s home was about as nice as his vehicle, in that it was not. White paint was peeling off the siding, the wooden front steps were uneven and unsettlingly concave, as though they might collapse at any moment, and there was a porch swing that was attached by only one chain, the other side having come in contact with the floor.
“It’s a little rough,” Jude admitted apologetically when he caught Al taking it all in. “I don’t have a lot of money. The place is cheap, but even with a roommate I still struggle to make ends meet sometimes.” He placed a hand on the doorknob and started to turn it, but then stopped abruptly. “Oh, speaking of my roommate, he’s a bit of an insomniac, so he might still be awake even though it’s late. I’m not too worried. He’s super chill and also usually stoned, so he probably won’t pay much attention to you, but just like, remember not to say anything about being an alien. Or about your spaceship. Or about the fact that you can shape-shift. If he asks about your accent, just say you’re from…” Jude twisted his mouth, the way Al noticed he tended to do when he was scrambling to think of something. “Greece. You’ve got a sort of Greek god thing going on, so we may as well lean into it. I also doubt he has any idea what a Greek accent sounds like, so he probably won’t mention it.”
“So if your roommate asks, I am to say that I am a Greek god?” Al felt that was a bit presumptuous.
“No, no, just like, regular Greek. Not a god.”
“Then why did you say I have a ‘Greek god thing going on’?”
“Because you look…” Jude huffed an exasperated sigh and buried his face in his hands, and Al immediately felt guilty for causing his new friend distress, even though he hadn’t meant to. After his moment of frustration, Jude let his arms drop like weights and schooled his face into something expressionless. “You’re Greek. Let’s leave it at that.”
“All right,” Al said, although he was still confused. Jude reached for the doorknob again, and Al added, “Where is Greek? Is it near Bumfuck Nowhere, New Mexico, Earth?”
Jude took a full step away from the door and crossed his arms.
“Okay,” he said with an air of defeat, “let’s figure out a story that won’t immediately blow your cover.” He gestured at the concave stairs. “C’mon and take a seat.”
* * *
By the time they were finally ready to enter Jude’s home, Al had been equipped with an admittedly vague but workable backstory that Jude promised they could flesh out in more detail later on. All that needed to be done for now was getting past Jude’s roommate, and they had enough established to accomplish that.
“Say it all back to me one more time so I know for sure we’re on the same page,” Jude instructed.
“You have had me say it several times already, Jude,” Al whined. He was eager to see the inside of a human home, as well as see another human up close. “I have proven my knowledge and I have excellent memory, I am promising you this.”
“Just humor me, please.”
“Are you requesting a joke?”
“Am I—no, man, it means I’m asking you to say it again anyway, just to soothe my anxiety.”
Al, who did not want Jude to be anxious or otherwise displeased, huffed at the pointlessness of the endeavor, but proceeded to recite their agreed-upon backstory.Again.
“My full human name that I am called is Alexander Leon, but I prefer to be called Al. It is my ‘nickname.’ I am from Athens, Greece, Europe, Earth—”
“Just say Greece, and if he asks you where in Greece, then say Athens. You don’t have to say the Europe and Earth parts.”
“On my home planet it is proper to state the full address of a location.”
“I get that, but on mine it will make you sound extremely weird. Trust me on this, okay?”
“If you say to trust you then I will trust you,” Al said uncertainly, “but I think perhaps English is not a smart language.”
