Matthew looked up from his phone and smiled, doing away with Damien’s residual anxiety. He nodded at Damien’s phone. “Who are you talking to?”
“Oh.” Damien shrugged. He slid his phone into his pocket and gave Matthew his best smile. “No one as important as you.”
* * *
Seven hundred square feet didn’t seem all that big until set upon by a four-year-old. As soon as Emily was through the front door, she tore through the condo like a squirrel at a bird feeder convention. One second she was on her hands and knees in front of the new couch, inspecting the space beneath with rapt attention for reasons unknown to man or god, and the next she was plastered against the floor-to-ceiling windows in Damien’s bedroom, gawking at the skyline. She crawled under the bed, stood on her toes to examine the bathroom sink, and struggled to pull the refrigerator door open. Damien watched her sprint to and fro like someone might watch a game of tennis, only in this case, the ball was a head of brown hair, and the game was making sure his condo remained in one piece.
“I like it here,” Matthew murmured as Emily tried with all her might to open the kitchen cabinets. Nadja had installed magnetic child locks in anticipation of her arrival, and Damien was pleased to see that they worked. “It’s cozy.”
“It’s not our forever home, but it’ll do for now.”
“Our forever home?” Matthew slipped under Damien’s arm and nestled against his side.
“Mmhm.” Damien kissed the top of his head and wrapped his arm around Matthew’s shoulders, holding him loosely in place. Across the room, Emily gave up on the cabinets and disappeared into the bathroom, undoubtedly to cause more trouble. “It may not seem like it now, sweet boy, but the baby you’re carrying for us is going to start to take up room. We can’t ask Emily to share her tiny space in the living room with her brother or sister. In the next few months, we’re going to need to find a bigger place to live.”
“Oh.” Matthew ran a hand over his flat stomach. Seeing him acknowledge the pregnancy in such a sweet and simple way did wicked things to Damien, and he had to distract himself before his thoughts carried him into inappropriate territory.
“I have a plan, though.”
The toilet flushed. Emily cackled. Damien made a note to ask Nadja for a list of local plumbers.
“What is it?”
“I was hoping you might want to talk about it tonight in bed. It’d be a bit too involved to get into with Emily running around. Once she’s asleep, we’ll have plenty of time to discuss it. I don’t want to make the decision without you.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really.” Damien kissed the top of Matthew’s head. “It affects both of us, and so it should be okayed by both of us. But let’s shelve that thought for now. We should see what that hellion daughter of yours is up to.”
Matthew puffed his cheeks, which made Damien laugh. Like father, like daughter. Would their child take after Matthew, too? As he followed Matthew into the bathroom to collect Emily, Damien imagined a second little girl with brown hair and dark eyes puffing her cheeks and clenching her fists at perceived injustice—his own tiny family of blowfish. He hadn’t known that it was possible to wish for something so hard, it hurt.
* * *
Later that night, after a long discussion about the future and the quietest sex Damien had ever had, he lay on his back while Matthew curled against his chest. They’d left the curtains open. The city bathed them in its glow.
“I need to ask you something,” Matthew admitted.
Damien played absentmindedly with his hair. “Mm?”
“When we were in Fiji, I asked you if you were really a single dad, and you dodged the question. Are you?”
“Oh.” Damien chuckled. “Yeah, no. I joined the group because of a misunderstanding.”
“How do you misunderstand something called the Single Dad Support Group? It’s exactly what it says on the tin.”
“Well.” Damien grinned. “First you get cheated on by a boy who only wanted to use you for your money. Once you’ve got step one on lockdown, you get drunk. Really fucking drunk. By then you should be feeling sorry for your pathetic-ass self, but if you don’t have time to make your own misery from scratch, listening to breakup songs and trolling the internet for quotes about true love is fine.”
Matthew snickered.
“As soon as you’re a blubbering mess, you decide that you’re lonely, and that your friendless ass needs someone to talk to. At this point, it’s optional to take a few more shots—I sure did.” Damien rolled his eyes at the memory. What a hangover that’d been. It was a surprise Whitcroft hadn’t fired him then and there. “Out of desperation, you search the internet for like-minded people—in my case, a Single Daddy Support Group.”
“Oh no.”
“Oh yes.”
“You didn’t.”
“I did.” Damien’s grin grew. “Let me tell you, for the first few months I thoughtIwas the most vanilla one in the group. Everyone was talking about balms for diaper rash and what brands of baby wipes wouldn’t tear midway through mud valley. You should have heard the crickets the first time I suggested spanking as a punishment. I’m pretty sure xV almost kicked me out of the group for that one. Thank god I figured out what the hell was going on before I put my foot in my mouth any more than I already had.”
