“I know.” Neon lights glinted in Adrian’s eyes and made the moisture on his lips look glossy. “Iwantto do this. It’s importanttome.”
“Then who am I to tellyouno?”
Sterling dealt in pleasure. If allowing Adrian to take control for the night would create it? It was worth submission. The give and take between them wasn’t typical of Sterling’s relationships, but with Adrian, it wasright.
There were very few men Sterling would submit to, but the small, pregnant partner grinding slowly against his thigh was a definiteexception.
Adrian’s hands threaded down Sterling’s arms until they were palm to palm. With gentle insistence, Adrian lifted them and laid them over his head so his wrists crossed. Sterling didn’t fight him—he allowed Adrian to take of himfreely.
“Stay,” Adriancommanded.
And Sterling would,indefinitely.
28
Adrian
There wasno hesitation from Sterling, no bitter glances or irritated looks. Adrian kept his wrists pinned with one hand, heart racing. This time was different than it had been before. The familiar ache in Adrian’s chest was there, its tightness snug and its presence radiating. Like a dandelion ready to spread its seed, that awareness gusted through Adrian, leaving traces of itself wherever it so happenedtosnag.
In his chest. In his stomach. In the small hairs onhisnape…
The love he felt would not be contained, not anymore, and the sensation was no longer strange so much as it was welcome. After years of self-loathing and hatred, Adrian had come to embrace what he truly needed: forgiveness, and a man who was willing to show him the waytoit.
Tonight, Adrian would show Sterling how much that meant to him—and how much that meant to hisfamily.
Sterling’s tie—the same one Adrian had taken from him earlier that night—had been neatly folded and placed with care into the pocket of Adrian’s pajama pants. He took it out now, unfurling it until the fat, pointed tip pooled on Sterling’s chest. Sterling looked up at him, eyes partially lidded, as he waited obediently for what Adrian was goingtodo.
Adrian didn’t keep himwaiting.
He moved the tie to Sterling’s wrists and looped it around and around until he’d effectively bound Sterling’s hands together. Then, careful not to tear the expensive silk, he fitted the knot into one of the restraints on theheadboard.
“Safe word is fern,” Adrian murmured. He ran a hand down Sterling’s chest affectionately until his fingertips met the top of the sheets. Lifting one leg, then the other, Adrian guided it down to eliminate the first layer between himself andSterling.
To his delight, he found Sterling naked beneath thesheets.
“What’s the safe word, Sterling?” Adrian traced a finger along the valley of Sterling’s abs, allowing himself to be drawn into the moment. Here he was, almost half Sterling’s age and at a physical disadvantage, binding Sterling to the bed while in completecontrol.
This was what heneeded.
He hoped it was what Sterlingneeded,too.
“Fern.”
“Good. That’s all you need to say, and then I’ll stop.” Adrian kissed him, then sat back on his haunches and stripped his shirt over his head. He tossed it aside, then took off his pajama pants so he, too, was nude. Adrian’s erection bobbed without support to hold it in place, its head glossy with precum. Adrian gave it a cursory stroke, then made eye contact with Sterling and held it for a tense moment before he moved downSterling’sbody.
Sterling’s cock could cut diamond, but for something so sturdy, it was surprisingly sensitive. Cut, the pretty band of his frenulum was on display. Adrian caressed it, allowing his fingertips to explore as his mind worked in ways it never had to bring Sterling not only utmost pain, but unexplored pleasureaswell.
Adrian’s relationship with pain had changed. The urge to inflict it and see it shape the faces of the men he played with still spoke to him, but his intent was different now. The liberation Sterling had worked him toward through sensual domination woke Adrian to the reality of his situation—since he’d come to The Shepherd, his sexuality had become an outlet for his anguish and guilt rather than a device of pleasure andsatisfaction.
Now that he realized that, he did his best tocorrectit.
His fingers found their way down Sterling’s shaft until they met the pouch of Sterling’s balls. Adrian traced patterns there, tantalizing Sterling with the sensation, but also with the thrill of the unknown. Sterling knew to expectsomething, but what that something was, Adrian wouldn’t say. He wasn’t sure he knew. What he did needed to feel right, and he hadn’t quite pieced all the parts together in his mind. Sterling was his blank canvas. Adrian wasn’t going to lose the chance to do with him as hewanted.
Beneath the neon lights, Adrian allowed his fingers to follow the veins of Sterling’s cock back up to his slit. Once he arrived, he smoothed his palm down Sterling’s shaft, then gave it an exploratory pump. Sterling puffed out a breath of contentment, and his headrolledback.
Adrian’s heart skipped a beat, and he pumped himagain.
There was power in taking control from someone physically stronger than he was—power greater than Adrian had ever noticed. And in a way, it was frightening. Before, when all he’d cared for was his own selfish gains, it hadn’t bothered him that the responsibility of play was on his shoulders when he assumed a dominant role in the bedroom. Now, it was harrowing in a way Adrian had a hard time coming totermswith.
