Despite his promises, he isn’t “good,” and in almost no time at all, he’s rocking back to meet every thrust as I hold onto his hips like my life depends on it. He feels incredible squeezed around my cock. It doesn’t matter how many times we’ve done this, somehow each time, it seems to blow my mind even more with just how amazing it is to be inside of him, how perfectly we manage to fit together.
The sounds he makes are intoxicating. “Right there,” “so good,” and “oh my god.” Each moan or cry sends me closer and closer to the edge. His knuckles are white where he’s gripping the edge of the table, using his hold to push himself back onto me with even more force. It’s too much, feels too good.
I don’t want it to be over. I want to live in this moment, live inside him, forever. But I’m only human, and his ass is squeezing me like it’s begging for my release. Hopefully those noises mean he’s as close as I am.
When I can’t possibly hold back any longer, I reach around to grasp his leaking cock. “Come for me,” I command, and on the first stroke, his release is covering my hand and the towel still on the table.
His ass clenches impossibly tighter around my dick as he comes, dragging out my orgasm at last as I continue to thrust into him.
I never want it to end, but far too quickly it’s over, I’m pulling out, and tying off the condom. I get us bothcleaned up in a daze. It’s really happening. Hudson isn’t going to come home with me.
We no longer live together.
As I’m pulling my clothes back on, Hudson, still standing there completely naked, is the first to talk. “I was thinking we could test out the TV in my room too, see if it’s at an okay angle to watch from the bed.”
I shake my head, trying to focus. As great as it would be to keep pretending, to continue with the excuses, that would just be more of the same, more of making myself the convenient option for him.
I let myself have tonight, honestly because I was too weak to say no, but if there’s any chance we can do this again, I need to stop doing what’s easy.
“I need to go,” I finally tell him with a sad smile.
His face falls, but he nods. “Okay, yeah. That was the deal. Can I walk you out at least?”
“You’re naked,” I remind him with a soft laugh as I shake my head.
“So?”
“So, I’ll see you around. Have a good game Sunday.” I try to turn to leave, but Hudson rushes forward to grab my hand.
“Hey, don’t do that,” he says. “Don’t pretend like this is the end.”
I shrug, desperately trying not to get my hopes up.
“Nothing has changed, Adrian. I still want to be with you. Unless something has changed for you? Do… Do you want this to be the end?”
I offer him my truth, or at least some of it, letting out a soft “No” as I shake my head. I’m not ready to admit just how much I want to be with him aloud, but I can say that much.
He smiles triumphantly. “Good. Then thisis just a new chapter for us. The one where I woo you.”
I can’t help it, a surprised laugh escapes from my throat. “Woo me?”
“Yup!” he answers confidently. “I know I messed up the order of things by doing all the physical stuff first, not that I regret any of that, obviously. But now I get to convince you that I’ll still want you without any of that. I’m excited.”
And despite myself, and all the reservations and anxiety I have over what’s going to happen next for us, I let his excitement rub off on me, just a bit, smiling for real before I squeeze the hand that he’s still holding and go up on my toes to kiss his cheek.
“I hope so,” I whisper before I turn and leave to spend the first night without Hudson as my roommate in almost ten months.
Apparently,wooing involves a lot of chocolates. And coffee. At least once a day, some sort of gift shows up at my desk or door. And Hudson hasn’t pulled back from talking to me at all, it’s just more over the phone than it used to be. When he’s been at his away games during his downtime, he’s suggested watching the same show together while we’re on the phone, or even just asks to stay on the phone with me while I’m working so that we can “hang out.” He’s still the first person I talk to every day and the last one before I fall asleep at night.
When he’s in town, he still invites me over to watch our favorite design shows, and it’s like we’re back in the early days of our friendship, on opposite sides of the couch. Except now, when our eyes meet, Hudson looks at me like I’m special, like he feels lucky to have me sitting on the other end of his sectional.
And every time he does, it feels like a brick is removed from the walls I’ve been hiding behind, so desperate to protect myself.
Do I really need protecting from him? I know I’ll never recover if he changes his mind, but that voice of fear is getting quieter and quieter with every passing day. With every meal his chef still prepares for me and still delivers to my house. With every order of food from our favorite restaurant he gets us at any given opportunity. With every time I hear his voice on the other end of my phone or see his name light up the screen.
Some days it’s hard to hear that voice of doubt at all.
I know I’d wanted to give him space, but he’s putting in so much effort to eliminate any that it’s hard to resist.
