ADRIAN
January
“Iknow you said you’d help however you can—and I so appreciate it—but are you sure you’re willing to take all the classes with me?” Hudson asks again as we’re walking up to the building where today’s class is being held. “The CPR one was great, definitely important knowledge, but I’m less convinced you’ll enjoyThe Basics of Baby Care.”
I grab his arm, stopping him in his tracks. “Hudson! You’re the one who asked me to come.”
He glances down at his feet sheepishly, his cheeks pinkening above his beard even more than they already were from the cold. It’s kind of adorable to see such a masculine man, looking extra big today in his puffy coat and beanie, look bashful. But Hudson literally always looks good, so I shouldn’t be surprised.
“I know, and I do think that it’ll be way more fun having you here! I just feel bad that I keep dragging you to this stuff with me.”
“Don’t feel bad! It’s not your fault so many of these classes are designed for couples—not that we’re a couple, obviously,” Iadd with a nervous laugh. “Plus, I always have a good time hanging out with you. And who knows when I might need to babysit for you. Or maybe I’ll even have my own kids one day. It’ll be good for me to know this stuff, too.”
He perks up; I think at the mention of me babysitting. I’ve been slowly starting to believe that he actually will want to remain friends even after he moves out, and it’s probably a relief for him to know he won’t lose my support, that I won’t disappear when he does become a parent. I know some people drift apart from friends when they have kids, but Hudson has nothing to worry about. He’s stuck with me in his life until he tells me otherwise.
“So, you do want kids?” he asks, sounding excited.
I nod, laughing. “How have we not talked about that?”
I know it can take me a while to really open up and talk about anything real, especially about myself. I can ramble about unimportant things with the best of them, and my inner circle is used to hearing every detail of my life, but I guess I’ve been afraid to scare Hudson away. I might have overcorrected there, though. “But yeah, I’d like to be a dad one day. I don’t have any retirement plans like you do, so I haven’t been quite as eager timeline wise, but I hope it happens for me.”
He smiles. He’s such a softie sometimes. I just want to wrap myself around him like a koala and never let go. I’m still daydreaming about the elevator hug and that was nearly a month ago now.
Time has honestly flown since Hudson’s interview. The contractors have made great progress on his house even though it’s nowhere near being done. He took a quick trip to see his parents for Christmas, and missed all the drama in my friend group—not that he really knows Oakley and Parker. But still, I wish he had been there when it all happened.
Thank God they gave me permission to tellHudson, though. So he got to hear all about how I was totally right all along and how I’ve always known those two should end up together with how much tension has been between them.Now if only my straight roommate and I could have the same outcome.
I know I shouldn’t entertain thoughts like that. But lately… I don’t know… Maybe it’s just how much I’ve been helping him with all the things required for the adoption, but sometimes it’s so easy to picture, with the way he teases and flirts, something that could actually mean more. With the way he looks at me sometimes… it just feels so real. Even if I know that’s all wishful thinking.
He hasn’t gone on any more dates since he started the adoption process, though, so he’s spent all his nights in town with me. It’s so easy to pretend we could be a couple when we live together and do all the perfectly normal, domestic things that make me so happy.
Who knows what he does on the road, though. He could be hooking up with different women every away game. God, I really should hook up with someone too. It’s been so long.
I just can’t really picture going out to find someone when the person I want has a bed in the next room. I’ve tried to be so good about not taking advantage of the proximity and try to remember to shut my door and respect roommate boundaries. But every once and awhile, I hear Hudson obviously jerking off, and I’m never strong enough to resist touching myself while I enjoy the erotic sounds he makes.
Obviously, he can never find out about that, though.
Maybe when Hudson moves out, I’ll force myself to go on a date or even just go out and meet someone for the night, but for now, I’m more than content with the way things are.
“Well then, I guess it is good you take the classes with me,” he concedes, pulling my attention back to him. “Let’s go learn how to change a diaper!”
23
HUDSON
Adrian really is good at everything. He had no trouble with the diaper, he picked up swaddling in no time, and now he’s mastered, like, four different burping positions while I’m still worried about hurting the fake baby doll they have us using.
It just seems so tiny in my giant hands even though I know newborns are even smaller. Still, I’m used to throwing my body into another grown man’s as we fight over the puck, being aggressive and physical. I’m definitely not used to being so delicate.
“Hudson, don’t look so afraid of it,” Adrian teases, carefully placing his baby in front of him. He reaches out to cover my hands with his, maneuvering me slightly until I have a better angle. “See, you were so close.”
I know he’s just trying to help, and I appreciate it, but touching me is far too distracting to be productive while I’m trying to learn this.
“I don’t know. I’m worried about what will happen if you’re not there to help me when it’s the real deal,” I admit.
He laughs like I’m joking. “I can be there if you want. We’ll still be neighbors, right?”
Right. Neighbors. That’s fine. Good even.
