“Bullshit, you’re running away. Why?” There’s no hiding from my brother even through the phone.
“I’m not running,” I lie.
“If that’s true, then why didn’t you wait until you saw me and Francie?” I shudder at the accusation filling his voice. He knows me. Knows how I am. “You’re running away again, Carina, and I want to know why.”
I don’t answer him for a long time, finally I breathe heavily and feel the tears burning to be spilled. “I’ll let you know when I get to Shiverborn.”
Cason curses, and his next words scare a part of me. “You can’t hide who the fuck you are. Who you were meant to be. You keep running, and you’re nothing but a coward instead of a dragon’s mate. Dragons don’t want bullshit scared shitless little girls who can’t do nothing but cower in fear. Grow the fuck up, Carina. You don’t, then don’t bother coming back here. You don’t belong.”
He disconnects the call before the words fully seep in and make their mark.
Am I a coward?
Yes, I am.
I’m a coward because I felt the desire pull me to the dragon I saw in the sky. I don’t want to be just adragon’s mate. I don’t want to be seen as just a woman with the mark of the dragon. I’ve worked too hard to make a life for myself that doesn’t include dragons in it.
I shake my head, refusing to let the first tear spill down my cheek. I have a long drive ahead of me, and a job to do. To hell with what Cason or anyone else thinks.
Screw the fates.
Screw the Gods.
Screw them all.
I create the path I’m on, and no one can change who I am and what I’ve become. Cason doesn’t know everything I endured growing up. No one does. They only know the basics. I’ve kept everything I went through a secret from them all, having written it down and hiding my journals from all who would find them under my bed.
Those journals were still there when I checked. They hadn’t been touched. I should have grabbed them, but I didn’t. They’ll have to stay there until I finally get the courage to pull them out and do something with them.
For the time being, I hope no one finds. Not that I have any worry they will. It’s been years, and still they haven’t been found. No one knows the truths I hide, truths I’ll never speak word of. It’ll only hurtthose around me more than I’ve hurt them in the years I’ve refused to listen to reason and come home.
It’s all I can do to push the thoughts out of my mind. Cason’s words haunt me and aren’t easy to block out. My brother can be mean, hurtful even, but never in our lives has he ever told me that I don’t belong with them.
My breath hitches, and I tighten my grip on the steering wheel, unable to keep the tears at bay as I try to do.
The ringing of my phone causes me to scream. Frustration. Hurt. Agony. Fear. All of them consume me, and I end up answering the phone, my voice raised. “What do you want? Why can’t you just stop?”It was the unknown caller again.
They don’t say anything, and I was done.
“Just leave me alone,” I scream into the phone, the tears spill down my cheeks faster. “Just leave me alone!”
“But I can’t,” the voice is grated and harsh. “I can’t leave you alone. Not when you belong with me. Soon, you’ll be just where I want you. See you soon, my dearest.”
The call ends, and a cold shiver shoots through my body, chilling me all over. It’s the first time the person has spoken. The voice sounded so evil andsinister, a part of me wants to call my brother and tell him. To confide in them all about what’s going on.
You don’t belong here.
Those four words pop into my head, and I know I can never call my brother about this. It’ll just prove to him just how much of a coward he thinks I am.
Through the tears, I look to the darkening sky. Clouds were coming in, and with them one hell of a storm. One I have a feeling I won’t make it through.
I should probably find somewhere to stop, but I can’t stop yet. I’ll drive until I can’t drive anymore. The storm won’t be that bad. Besides, I’ve driven through worse, I’m sure of it.
I should have stopped. Driving through mountains during a storm like this is not a good idea.
Stupid really.
So, so, stupid.
