“See you tomorrow, angel,” Cade said, the words breathy.
How did he make everything sound like seduction? From his reaction, I might as well have asked him to partake in an orgy. Sighing and trying to keep my mind off his body, I threw thephone onto the passenger seat and reversed out of the parking space.
It would be nice not to be alone this time.
Dilemma of the day—do I dress for a date or as if I’m going to a funeral?
Dad wouldn’t care either way, but it was a sign of respect to at least make an effort when I went to see him. It was only once a year, after all. Eventually, I settled on gray wide-leg slacks and a terracotta-color top which, when tucked in, gave me an almost businesswoman look.
I imagined Cade also wouldn’t care, but I was wearing simple black clothes when he had met me—only one step short of having a little hat with a black veil for the funeral—so I didn’t want to show up to our first date if that’s even what this was in jeans and aMy Chemical RomanceT-shirt that was torn, but I loved too much to get rid of.
Shoveling all the stuff from the passenger seat into the back—not rubbish, just morethingsthat I seemed to accumulate—I then made my way to Cade’s to pick him up. He lived in an apartment building about ten minutes from my place, and when he jumped in, I made no effort to hide I was checking him out—leather jacket and jeans and a black T-shirt.
Damn. Hot.
Now wasn’t the time to touch him, but when he leaned over to kiss my cheek, I turned and met his lips with mine. He seemed surprised but didn’t pull away, instead turning the chaste kiss dirty and snaking his hand through my hair before pushing his tongue into my mouth. I moaned, whimpering when he broke the kiss. This was neither the time nor the place to be gettingraunchy, but I had forgotten how he made my skin tingle simply by being close. Cade stared at me with such intensity when he pulled away, smiling in a way that made my legs turn to jelly.
Then he frowned, reached up again, pulled the hair tie from my hair, and used his fingers to comb my hair around my shoulders.
“What’s it with you and ponytails?” he muttered. He looked at my hair with something almost akin to awe, but it could have been something more sinister, judging by how he kissed me.
“What is it with you and my hair?” I failed to keep the scowl from my face and the resulting tone from infecting my voice. I’d had enough of people obsessing over my hair to last me a lifetime. Cade simply chuckled and ran his thumb over my bottom lip before settling back in his seat and pulling on his seat belt. He looked larger than life in my small car, his head almost scraping the fabric on the ceiling and his legs bent even though the seat was as far back as it could go. Yet he still managed to recline and appear somewhat comfortable, and I got the impression there wouldn’t be much that would rattle this man.
Once we were on our way, Cade turned in his seat and inspected the back seat of my car. My lips pressed together in a thin line, and while he smirked, most likely noting the mess closely resembled my home, but he said nothing about it.
“No flowers?” he asked.
I lifted a shoulder, keeping my eyes ahead. “Dad wouldn’t have wanted flowers. He felt they were a waste of money.”
“Romantic.”
I threw him a look, only to relax when I saw the smirk still firmly planted on his face. He was messing with me again. “I brought a picnic, though.”
“Seriously?”
“Yep, hope you like quiche.”
“Nothing makes me feel more like a man than eating quiche.”
“I have dainty little decorative forks too.”
“Good, I’ll remember to keep my pinky up.”
I laughed, and my stance relaxed further. I shifted in my seat, not even sure at which point in the conversation I had begun tensing up. I still didn’t know Cade well, and perhaps I was on edge, wondering if he would make fun of me for the way I grieved. Hell, I could handle teasing—I wasn’t a child—but this was a sore spot, and I tended to be on edge the moment the topic came up, preparing myself for a verbal joust I felt was inevitable.
Rolling my shoulders, I threw another smile at Cade, glad that I had asked him to come along and even more so that he had accepted. Nothing about his face or responses beyond the casual teasing indicated he thought it was weird I had packed a lunch for us. This wasn’t just a five-minute trip for me to mutter a few words of prayer and leave. I booked this day off every year, and I’d simply sit at Dad’s grave for hours. Sometimes talking, other times simply lying in the sun and reading if I remembered to bring a book. It seemed unusual compared to what I knew of others who had their annual rituals to mourn those passing, and I couldn’t help feeling my girlfriends might judge me for my odd behavior.
I hadn’t ever asked them. Mom would say I wasn’t even giving them a chance to really know me. I kept my friendships fairly superficial. This wasn’t news to me.
I liked to have fun when I caught up with the girls and not talk about all the shit going on. Sue me.
This time, since I had company, I thought I’d bring a picnic. I didn’t see what was weird about it, but I can imagine some people would think it odd. While I was close to my mother as well, she had wanted her ashes returned to Ireland to be spread over the Cliff of Moher, where she used to spend time with her parents, so an annual trip wasn’t an option. One day I’d go visit that spot, though.
It was much too early to ask Cade if he wanted to come to Ireland with me. Just because it had been a while since I had someone I’d even consider asking, it didn’t mean I needed to come on too strong.
“Well, you’re going to love this. I also brought sparkling wine and orange juice so we can make mimosas.”
Both his eyebrows shot up at this. “Are we visiting a graveyard or an outdoor concert? What’s with all the hurrah?”
