Oh, the nerve of him. I grabbed my bag, retrieved some cash, and threw it on the table. It would more than cover my half of the meal. “Good night, Ian.”
His eyes widened before he jumped up. He hesitated, then gently reached for my arm. “Please don’t go.”
I stood stunned for a moment. His touch felt right, but that was wrong. “Why does it matter to you?” I threw back at him. What was wrong with me? I wasn’t usually this snotty. He was bringing out the worst in me. He didn’t used to. In fact, he used to bring out the best in me, but in my defense, I cried for months over him once upon a time, and now he stole my job.
He gazed down at me. I had forgotten how tall he was, or how short I was. I had also forgotten how much I loved the way his eyes darkened the closer I got to them, and how good he smelled.
“I’m sorry. Please sit down.” His thumb glided over my skin. I don’t think he meant to do that by the way he quickly let go of me and backed off. Oh, how I wish he hadn’t. I felt too good.
He waited for me to sit down before he did the same. He picked up my money and handed it back to me. “I insist on paying for dinner.”
“I can’t let you do that.”
“Why do you have to be so obstinate?”
“I don’t need your charity,” I was back to being snarky. “I may not be a multi-millionaire, but I’ve done well for myself, and I’ll be fine without this job.”
He rubbed his neck with his free hand. “Kelli, this isn’t charity. I know you’ve done well for yourself. Look at it like two old friends catching up.”
“Ian, if that’s the case, you’re the worst friend I’ve ever had.” There was no malice in my words, only the truth. He was the worst because he used to be the best and his leaving took a piece of my soul.
He lowered his eyes. “I suppose I deserve that.” He took several deep breaths before he sat up taller, all business-like. “Kelli, professionally speaking, today is going down as one of the most unpleasant of my career. I apologize for not being as forthcoming as I should have been with Gary. I didn’t realize the personal and professional relationship that existed between the two of you. Let’s just say he wasn’t very impressed when I told him how I knew you and that I hadn’t disclosed it.”
I pressed my lips together trying not to smile, but I failed, maybe on purpose.
“Honestly, I think if there wasn’t an iron clad contract in place, he may have fired me today. I’ve never seen anyone so upset about losing an employee, and then there was the executive secretary.”
“I think the word you’re looking for is admin assistant, or you could just call her Delfia. She hates to be called a secretary.”
“Thanks for the heads up, but she already detests me.”
Yep, I smiled big at that.
“I’m sure you’re going to assume that I only want you to come back to make my life easier, but honestly Kelli, I would be a fool to let such a talented employee go. I know what you bring to the table. I’ve been very impressed. So name your terms.” After his groveling, or as close as he ever came to groveling, he sat back against the booth, crossed his arms, and dared me with his eyes to come back to Chandler.
As I thought about what to say and do, Jose came back and brought our check. He handed it to Ian. I pushed my money back over to him.
“I won’t take your money, Kelli.”
I reluctantly took it back.
“Are you ready to dance?” Jose asked.
I grabbed my bag and scooted out of the booth. “Yes.” I took Jose’s arm before turning toward Ian. “Thank you for dinner.”
“Kelli, please come back?”
I swallowed hard. “I need the weekend to think about it.”
Ian nodded. “I understand, but I hope you’ll change your mind.”
ON MY DRIVE HOME, I couldn’t get over the day I’d had. To think it had started off so hopeful, only to end with my ex-boyfriend and would-be boss staring at me on the dance floor. I thought he would have just left after he paid for dinner, but he stayed and watched me dance with Jose. I couldn’t help but watch him too. I swore in his eyes I saw the memory of us slow dancing outside of his apartment in the first snow of the season during the year we were together. While I generally didn’t care for the frosty white flakes, when I shared it with Ian it took on a new life, a magical one. Ugh. My brain needed to stop recalling every memory of him, except the one where he left me crying and wondering what I had done wrong. Or of all the phone calls that went unanswered. He ghosted me before it was even a term.
Tonight, Ian walked out on me again without saying a word, but this time it felt different. I didn’t have the punch in the gut feel. It was more of a prick to my heart. Too many what ifs ran through my mind. I had no business wondering what if that fateful night thirteen years ago never happened. Or what if we had stayed together? It didn’t help when Alicia remarked after he left, “He looks like a man who knows regret.”
Don’t we all know regret? Like me. I regretted going to work today, and a little of me regretted my snotty attitude. Just because Ian was a jerk didn’t mean I had to be one. I felt so bad about it I called Amanda as soon as I got home. I needed her to make me feel better. I replayedthe whole crazy dinner story for her. “Was I out of line?” I asked. “And why couldn’t I control my snarkiness? I’m not used to being rattled.”
She laughed. “Oh honey, don’t be so hard on yourself. He’s lucky you didn’t punch him. It’s his own fault for leaving you with so much pent-up anger. He’s the one who chose to walk away without giving you a reason.”
