“I don’t follow.”
“I know you offered to financially support the baby, but that won’t be necessary.”
His eyebrows raise and I prepare for him to push back just because it’s me and he will do anything to get under my skin.
“Why is that?”
“Because from the time that baby is born, it’s mine. I will raise that child and care for them and you’ll sign the consent forms terminating your rights, so I can adopt him or her as soon as possible.”
I brace myself for the fight that’s coming, but Trey surprises me by saying something I never expected. “You really do love her, don’t you?”
“I’ve loved her since we were fourteen. When you asked me about her when we were kids, I lied. It’s the biggest regret of my life.” His eyes widen at that revelation. Something about him seems different, reminding me a little bit of how he used to be when we were growing up.
“I knew it. You tried to play it off, but I noticed how you always looked at her. I hated you for always being there. I let my jealousy get in between her and I.” He looks down at his coffee and when his eyes return to mine, I can tell they’re a little misty.
A silence settles between us as I watch him take another drink of his black coffee. I don’t know why I just noticed, but he looks awful. His black hair is messy, so unlike him. He’s also wearing baggy sweats and a hoodie. The dark circles under his eyes look bruised. The Trey Spencer I’ve always known is put together, the best dressed, and never a hair out of place.
“You look like garbage, Spencer.”
His eyes narrow, “Thanks, Mills.”
“No, I mean, are you okay?”
“Don’t act like you care about me.”
“We were friends once. And while I may not like you most of the time, I’m not a complete jerk.”
His small laugh eases the awkwardness between us, at least momentarily. He looks at me like he’s trying to assess whether I’m being honest or making fun of him. “Honestly, this whole mess with Mackenzie and the baby has been too much. It’s totally screwed with my head. Mills, I can’t be a dad. I wasn’t ever really sure if I wanted kids, but finding out about the baby reinforced that. I know it makes me sound like I’m a horrible person, and I probably am. A family isn’t for me—not in the way she wants, and definitely not right now.
“I loved Mackenzie, but we were done a long time ago. I just couldn’t let her go. I held on to her so possessively because I knew you’d be waiting in the wings and I hated the idea of you having her.”
I take his words in, honestly shocked. He doesn’t want kids or Mackenzie, for that matter. I know she told me he didn’t, but I thought he’d walk in ready to fight for her and the baby. Even if it was just for the fact he didn’t want to lose face.
“Geeze, man. That’s pretty messed up.”
“Believe me, I know.”
“Look Trey, I’m going to lay it out for you. You don’t need to feel anything about it anymore. I know it’s easier said than done, but you made your choice. If I’m completely honest, I’m glad you don’t want a part of their lives. I will be the man Mackenzie deserves—and the father the baby can rely on.
“I know you and Mack decided to contact via lawyers only. So, I will send the paperwork to you about termination of your rights.”
“You’re serious about that?”
“Dead serious.”
“And she won’t take my money?”
“Not a penny. Leave it with me. I want her and this child more than anything in the world.”
“You really are the better man for her, Jordan. But I will never admit that to anyone but you.”
“So, what do you think?”
“I think this is an answer to my prayers. I’m a selfish man, Jordan, I know that. I may not want to be a dad, but I’d never want to do anything to hurt the kid. I have a feeling that’s all I’d be doing by trying to make things work in a co-parent relationship with Mackenzie.”
He’s right about that. He is incredibly selfish, but also self-aware enough to do what’s right for the kid.
“It may come from selfish reasons, but you’re doing what’s best for the kid. Ultimately that earns you some respect in my book.”