“So, Kayla wasn’t sitting in your lap when I walked into your house last night?”
I notice his hands fist at his side before he answers. He’s angry andused to me taking his every word as gospel truth. That ends now. That should have ended a long time ago, if I’m being honest.
“She sat there. Nothing was happening, and I wasn’t going to do anything with her.”
A hard laugh escapes me before I can stop it, and Trey’s eyes flare with something I haven’t seen before. It scares me. I hesitate, unsure of which version I’ll get: the boy I fell in love with or the man I’m starting to fear.
“Something you want to say, Kenz?” That dark tone is ominous, and this is it. This angry version of Trey Spencer that didn’t exist, or he hid, until a year ago.
Pulling on my big-girl panties, I have my chance to ask him what I need to know. “Have you ever cheated on me with her?”
“No.” He answers me so quickly, I’m not sure he even heard my question. For the first time since we started dating, I don’t believe him.
“I think we should take a break.” The words I’ve been thinking and feeling for a few weeks now leave and I feel relief for about three seconds before he steps into my space and backs me into a corner of the living room.
My heart rate skyrockets as the man staring into my eyes is not my Trey. His eyes are dark as he puts his hands on the wall on either side of my head and leans in too close.
“Want to say that again? I know I didn’t hear you say you wanted a break.”
My body shakes. He hasn’t touched me, but I’m afraid. I have to defuse this situation before things get out of hand. Trey has never put his hands on me in a violent way. Ever. But he’s been lying and raging, moods changing at the drop of a hat. He’s unrecognizable like this and I don’t know what he’s capable of.
“Trey, can we sit down or something? You’re scaring me.” He jolts at my words almost like he was having an out-of-body experience and Ibrought him back to reality. He steps back and we both walk to sit on the couch, I sit at the opposite end, two cushions between us.
I finally answer his question, my voice trembling, but it’s necessary. “I think we should take a break. I need some time and we can talk after we go home for Thanksgiving.”
“No. That’s weeks, Kenzie. I’m not going to let you do this just so you can go home alone and single to see Jordan Mills on Thanksgiving.”
“Trey, it’s not like that and you know it.”
“What I know, Mackenzie, is that every time we fight, you run to him and he’s more than happy to have you there. He wants you. He always has. But I won’t let you go. You are mine.”
Okay—to be fair—I have turned to Jordan in times of crisis. It started unintentionally, just a vent session here and there, but in the last six months he’s become the person I talk to the most about everything, not just my relationship. Trey hates that I’m friends with him and I even cut off communication for a little while, but it’s unfair that Trey can be friends with girls like Kayla and I can’t be friends with someone I’ve known since I was fourteen. I’m not putting up with double standards. Not anymore.
“I’m sorry, Trey. I know my friendship with Jordan hurts you. But I don’t have any feelings for him. I promise. I’ve loved you for eight years. I choose you and I always have.”
He nods, his temper cooling slightly and I feel my shoulders relax only a little, knowing that he won’t let it go completely.
“I know, baby. He wants you though. A man can tell when someone is after his girl and I see it. I hate that he’s Reagan’s brother and your families are always together. I won’t stand for him moving in on you.”
“You have nothing to worry about. I promise, there is nothing there on my end. Jordan is always out and dating around, so just trust me with my feelings for you.”
“Okay. But one wrong move, and I’m going to say something to him. Again.”
“Listen Trey, we need to talk about last night. Why do you think it’s okay to entertain Kayla? You know the rumors… It hurt me. You think it’s hurtful that I sometimes talk to my friend who lives on the other side of the country? Try seeing someone sitting on your lap in front of me! You broke a piece of my heart last night, Trey.”
The boy I’ve loved since high school, now the man I thought I’d be with forever, drops to his knees in front of me. Magically, his tears return, but we’ve been here before. I don’t know how much longer I can go through this with him.
“Kenzie, baby, I can’t do life without you. You’re my world. My everything. I love you so much. These puck bunnies and other girls, they’re nothing. You never come out with me and they all think it’s okay. But I promise, nothing happened. Please, don’t break us. I won’t make it without you. I need you.”
My breathing stalls as I listen to things that Trey used to say in love and now they’re manipulation and threats with a side of guilt.
“Trey, I hear what you’re saying. Things between us have felt off for a while now and I need to clear my head and figure some things out. We aren’t broken up, but I want space. I don’t think you should come to my house for Thanksgiving either.”
He pulls my hand to his lips, still on his knees, he kisses each of my fingers, and I feel my resolve melting bit by bit. “Please, don’t do this. I need you. Only you. You can have space and I won’t come on Thanksgiving, but promise me that we’ll work through this together. You won’t leave me?”
I close my eyes, trying to summon the strength to follow through and give us what we both need, but don’t want. “Okay. If we get to this place again, I’m done. Whether it’s rumors or truth, I can’t live my life with someone who isn’t faithful to me.”
He’s up, scooping me into his lap before sitting back on the couch. A winning smile spreads across his face, tears long gone. “I promise. Things will be different from now on.”
