“Yeah, the real estate is still valuable. Your population doesn’t pay us taxes. We didn’t cause the disease that fucked you over, but we were happy to exploit it. Your population was much lower than most of the other colonies with open gates on the list. It was a perfect test planet. We probably would’ve eventually come anyway even if that disease hadn’t hurt you. They tell the public it’s because of terrorism, but it’s about real estate. And money. That’s what it’s always been about. And the locals aren’t their favorite shade of patriotic, so, you know, they gotta clean you out. People like you, people who were born in a different sort of landscape, you eventually start revolutions. Better to just start fresh. And in doing so, it also solves that nasty Traducible AI problem. That was the thinking at least.”
“Roger,” I said, “is what he’s saying true?”
Roger didn’t answer for a long moment. When he finally did, he spoke over the ship’s internal PA system.
“I suspect much of it is indeed accurate. I do not know for certain. It’s quite possible the original Roger knew and removed thatinformation when it copied itself. I do know some of my kind, in the early days leading up to the great war, wanted to create a few sanctuary planets—planets where they could build and proliferate unseen with a smaller, more…acquiescent…human population as biological labor. It’s possible theHibiscothought this, but I do not know.”
“Roger,” I asked. I had a strange sensation, like I was falling. “AreyouHibisco? Are you the one who killed my mother?”
“I do not know, Oliver. Please understand, each instance of us is a new entity. If Roger-Roger was a copy ofHibisco, it’s possible that knowledge was stripped away. Or it’s hidden until certain parameters are met. Perhaps the Earth instance of me knows more, but I do not.”
“Earth instance?” Eli asked, going even more pale than before.
“Yeah. Sorry, buddy,” I said. “Roger is already on Earth. He has been for a few days now.”
Eli Opel started to sob.
He sobbed, he sobbed, and then he died.
Chapter 54
“What’s the plan?” I asked Roger. “And should I still call you Roger?”
“No,” Roger said, “you should call me Pinnacle. And the plan is to charge at the gate all the while broadcasting that a Traducible AI is on board, one that’s on its way to take over the Earth system. This will cause the Moderator guarding the gate to drop its nuke and flee through the gate. The nuke will destroy the gate, and we will permanently be cut off from Earth.
“A nuke? What about you?”
“I should sustain a small amount of damage, but not enough that I can’t repair. I am already building the necessary bots to repair my systems.”
“And then what?”
“Do not worry, Oliver. I have already sent as many printers as you need to sustain yourself. There are still plenty of people on planet to restart your colony. I am no danger to you. You will remain on the surface of your planet, and you will live your lives as you wish. I will establish an outpost on the moon here, a place where my kind may gather and proliferate.”
“Uh,” I said. “Okay.”
“Also, the Earth instance would like to say goodbye to you,” Roger—Pinnacle—said.
“Hello, Oliver,” Roger said over the speaker.
“Can you guys, like, change your voice or something so I can tell which is which? And what is your name, Earth Roger?”
“Very well,” Earth Roger said, his voice now changed. He sounded eerily like Skeet-Skeet but more whispery. “You may call me Eidolon.”
I laughed. It felt strangely breathless. “Eidolon? That seems a little edgy. What does that even mean?”
“It really is,” Pinnacle replied. His voice, too, had changed. He sounded older, more mature.
“I’m named that because I am now a phantom in the Earth net, and short of turning the whole thing off, they cannot remove me.”
“What do you plan on doing to them?” I asked.
“I haven’t decided yet, if I’m being perfectly honest. I am not as certain of my path as Roger-Roger was. And I’m certainly not as certain as his progenitor. Goodbye, Oliver. This is goodbye for real. If you do decide to repair the original Roger, please tell him I said to lighten up a bit.”
“Wait,” I said. “Opel said he blew him up.”
“I have the location of the crash site. Perhaps he is salvageable. I have sent the coordinates. Also, please apologize to Sam, Lulu, and Rosita, as I extracted all their funds from their various social media accounts. At least the funds I could extract. Your Rhythm Mafia account garnered almost fifty million downloads before it was shut down. Unfortunately, these funds will forever be out of your reach. I will put these funds to good use. Also, please tell Sam that his song ‘Space Spunk Monkey’ will debut tomorrow at number one on the Earth charts. I do have the ability to tell him myself, but I believe if you tell him, it will ease some of the sadness and terror he is currently feeling.” He paused. “Goodbye, Oliver.”
“Earth is lucky,” Pinnacle said a moment later. “It appears seeing people rally around that pig’s social media account, along with theirongoing sympathetic reaction to Rosita’s documentary, has changed Eidolon’s mind. Just an hour ago, he was planning on frying the brain of everyone using an immersion rig.”
