Then Joey slammed both palms on the table. “Yes!”
The table erupted. Bea launched herself sideways into Stella, nearly knocking them both off the bench. Anna clapped her hands over her mouth and then started applauding, which spread around the table until everyone was clapping and laughing and talking over each other. Bernie raised his water glass and said, “Called it,” which made Luke laugh harder. Meg was crying and applauding at the same time.
“Okay, okay—” Fiona held up her hand, laughing despite herself. “But I have conditions.”
The table quieted, wary.
“Not legal conditions. Practical ones.” Fiona looked around the table with mock seriousness. “You should know what you’re signing up for.”
“Uh oh,” Stella said.
“First–she will steal the pepperoni off your pizza when you’re not looking. She’s been doing it since she was four. She thinks she’s subtle. She is not subtle.”
“I am very subtle?—”
“Second–she hums when she’s concentrating. Badly. The same three bars of a song she heard once in 2019. Over and over. You will want to throw things.”
“It’s a good song!”
“Nobody knows what song it is, Stella. Including you.” Fiona was smiling now, her eyes bright.
Tyler was grinning. “Noted. Anything else?”
“Her shoes. If she doesn’t wear socks, keep them outside. Trust me on this.”
“Mum.”
“I’m doing them a service, darling.” Fiona sat back down, looking enormously pleased with herself.
“Since we’re sharing,” Meg said, her eyes gleaming, “Tyler once put a frozen pizza in the oven with the cardboard still on it. The smoke alarm woke up the entire block.”
“I was twelve?—”
“You were nineteen. It was your first week at college. Margo got a phone call from campus security.”
“That is... unfortunately accurate,” Margo admitted.
“And Meg,” Anna jumped in, leaning forward, “organized her Halloween candy by color, size, and chocolate percentage. She had a spreadsheet. At age nine.”
“It was a very effective system?—”
“She made a profit,” Anna continued
“That’s not embarrassing, that’s entrepreneurial,” Meg protested.
“You charged our brother interest, Meg.”
Luke was laughing so hard he had to set down his glass. “Interest, even. That’s Meg.”
Bernie leaned toward Fiona. “You see what you’re entrusting her to? These people couldn’t organize a sock drawer between them.”
“We organized a restaurant,” Meg said.
“Eventually,” Bernie allowed. “After several near-death experiences and one incident with a fire extinguisher I’m still not allowed to discuss.”
“The fire extinguisher was Joey’s fault,” Tyler said.
“The fire extinguisher was nobody’s fault,” Joey said quickly. “It was a spontaneous event.”
