The quiet that falls between us isn’t silent.
Not in the least.
It’s punctuated by our unsteady breathing, by the faint hum of the fan overhead, by the thundering of my pulse in my ears.
“How am I looking at you?” I ask long minutes later.
She turns away. “You know.”
“Raindrop—”
Her body goes stiff and her words come sharp and icy. “Like I’m dirty. Like I’m broken. Like I’m a leper who you won’t ever want to touch again.”
“Okay, now you’re pissing me off.”
She blinks.
“I want you more than I’ve ever wanted another woman. And I don’t care who you fucked or touched.”
A shake of her head.
“I hate that your choices were taken from you. I hate that you were forced to do things you didn’t want to. And I hate that you were hurt, Raindrop. By me, by them, by the fucking shit they made you do. But I wouldn’t care if you chose to fuck a hundred guys while we were apart.” I move to pull her into my arms again, but when she steps away, I freeze. “I’d still love you. And I still won’t let you go.”
She’s quiet, so damned quiet.
And Christ, I want to take her in my arms,needto hold her.
“Briar, baby?”
She shakes her head again, but doesn’t retreat, thank fuck. Slowly, like I’m cornering a wild animal, I wrap my arms around her. It takes a long time for her to unfreeze, to relax into my touch.
“I didn’t,” she whispers.
“I don’t care, Raindrop. I promise.”
“I didn’t,” she whispers again. “The closest it ever came was that time. But one of the other women—” Her throat works. “Usually I worked alone, but sometimes there would be a few of us.”
“She helped you?” I ask gently.
A nod. “Angela gave me the bottle of pills to swap out.”
I stroke my hand up and down her back. “I’m glad.”
Her forehead drops to my chest. “At first it was just dropping off things and picking them up or being a lookout. Then it was…more—playing a role, causing a distraction. But it’s been escalating,” she whispers. “Becoming riskier, like they don’t care if I’m caught, like I’m dispensable.”
“Good,” I mutter.
She jerks in my hold. “Good?”
“It’ll make it easier to get you out if they aren’t trying so hard to keep you.”
“Have you been listening to me at all? These people are dangerous!”
“Yeah, they are. So?”
Her mouth opens and closes, eyes flaring wide. “So we’ve both tried to fight them, but it didn’t work.”
“Anything else?”
