“I believed you. I just thought that I would see your attack coming again.” His chin dips, eyes darkening. “I didn’t.”
My gaze flits across his. “Why?”
“Because you were with your dragon. You accessed her and she responded. You’re one step closer to shifting at will, Kaisa. We’re one step closer to ending Dyeus’s reign.” He scans my face, his hold on me tightening a fraction. A flood of desire heats my blood.
My hand presses against his chest and his heartbeat pounds beneath my fingertips. “Should I try?”
“There is nothing else you can do but try.”
Nodding, and a little wary, I pull away from him, giving enough space for my dragon to exist. I see her in my mind, just as she was—as she is. I reach out my hand to her.
I slip into her scales and take up her space. Slide my tongue across my teeth, sharp and long. Toss my head, and let my mane shake, luxuriating as my whiskers float on the breeze. I drum my talons on the hard floor beneath my feet.
I allow her to take her place. I imagine the bright vaporous energy that always comes from the draconem when they shift, and instead of my dragon ripping and clawing her way out, she simply sighs into existence. I feel like I’ve climbed a mountain, only to have reached the top and finally caught my breath.
With my wide, wandering dragon vision I look up at the blue sky, dazzling me with colors of the world’s energy. Strands of this power flow as if caught in a rushing river, passing me by. I catch them between my teeth and swallow them whole. The gods eyes, usually visible only at night, is a beacon, pulsing steady and frantic, calling to me.
“You are a marvel,” Ozias says, something like affection warming his tone.
Seeing him there like that, I want to be with him, fully human. I want him to trust me. I want the possibility ofsomething…more. I want to have something, someone, as mine, of my own choosing, and who will choose me back in equal measures. I realize now it’s up to me to take that first step. I won’t run away from this.
I slip back into my human skin, letting myself be drawn into his golden gaze, alight and burning. “Do you believe in me? Do you think I’m capable of doing what needs to be done?”
Ozias looks at me, long and deep, and it stirs a ravenous desire within. “I want to. So I do.”
It’s as simple as that, and sometimes, that’s the way things are. “I need to tell you something.”
Ozias shores himself up with an inhale.
My stomach flips at his hesitation, but I charge forward. “About what’s happening to me at night.”
Ozias lets out a breath, then he nods. “You can tell me anything.”
I worry what Atlanta will think and say when she learns about this, but we have to trust each other if this is going to work—and ithasto work. Still, it’s a long beat before my mouth will cooperate enough to speak the words. “I’m seeing the Sar Dyeus —Zhoric—at night. In my dreams. At least, I thought that’s what it was. Then I did some research and now I know a little more about mind walking, thanks to Atlanta’s lovely, yet lengthy, text on the subject.”
The muscles around his eyes tense. “She is a savant of sorts on the matter.”
Ozias is silent, contemplative. I let him think, but panic sets in. Could this be the moment where I made a mistake? Did I let him get too close and now I’ve ruined everything and it will take years, decades, centuries, to do what no one else has been able to do before me, all because I didn’t want to do it alone? All because I was afraid if I let my heart open to Zhoric, the bond would pull not only him, but me, too? Finally, Ozias sighs, his expression open, giving my anxiety a brief respite. “I’m wondering…I’m wondering if this is something we bring to Atlanta.”
Flicking my gaze down, I worry my bottom lip with my teeth. After a moment, I meet his stare again from under thefan of my lashes. “I overheard you two the other night. It sounded as if she’s worried about the strength of my potential bond with him. I can’t…” I stop and try to get my emotions under control, but tears are already stinging my eyes and nose. “I can’t not try. I can’t let this drag on any longer. Ninon…” I shut my eyes and wait for the emotion to pass.
Ozias doesn’t say anything and I fall once again into thinking I’ve made a grave mistake when a warm, steady pressure caresses the side of my face. I open my eyes, and lean my cheek into Ozias’s hand.
“I understand and I’m with you.” He nods, reassuring and patient. “Let’s keep this between us.”
Tremendous relief floods me. It’s not that I want to keep it from Atlanta, but she sounded so unsure days ago, and I’m glad to keep it between us for now. “I want to use it, Ozias. I know you think my elahi will be enough and I know that I have strength in me…but what if it fails? What if you’re wrong and I can’t force anything onto him?”
“So what are you suggesting?”
“I seduce him. I make him fall for me so that when the time comes, I can bond with him,” I shake my head, “no question, no ifs.”
A slow smile spreads across his mouth. “Your mind is as marvelous as your spirit. If you’re not careful, you might make me fall for you, too.”
I return his smile, excitement thrumming through me. “I don’t know if that sounds like such a bad thing.”
The expanse of his answering grin is all I need.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
