“Please, before you say anything, there is so much I need to tell you. All I ask is that you listen and then, once I have told you everything, you can decide how you feel.”
“I know how I feel.”
He winced. “That may change…”
Christopher led Rose from the orangery into his bedroom. There, he had a fire lit for them, tea was made, and it was only once he had a blanket around his shoulders and a hot cup of tea in his hands that he started to speak.
And Rose listened throughout.
She listened as he told her about his mother and his upbringing.
She listened as he told her about his dedication to the lie that had since become his personality and temperament.
She listened as he told her how desperate he was to keep the lie, why he felt he had to, and the fear of what he suspected would happen if the lie should ever be revealed.
And most of all, she listened as he told her what a fool he was.
“I’m sorry,” Christopher said. “I’m sorry for lying to you. I’m sorry for not trusting you. And most of all, I’m sorry for hurting you, because that is what I did. You can hate me. You can want nothing to do with me, and I will accept that. But please know, I never, ever meant to hurt you as I have done. And that I did hurt you…” He shook his head to himself, his chin wobbling. “That is something I will have to live with for the rest of my life.”
They were sitting on the same couch in front of the fire. Christopher was huddled toward the end, seemingly done on purpose to give Rose space. Almost as if he was afraid to get too close.
Rose considered her husband for a second. She thought about what he had said and what it all meant. A revelation to be sure, and not something that she could simply ignore. There would be time for more questions, more answers, and time for them to decide what, if anything, they meant to do.
Most of all, what Rose thought about, what she took notice of, was how different her husband looked from what she remembered. He was sad and broken. He was a shell of the calm and confident man whom she knew. And importantly, he was real.
He was no longer hiding who he was. He was no longer scared to reveal his true self to her. He was no longer running, no longer lying, and no longer a stranger.
This is the man whom I wanted to marry. This is the man with whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life. And this is the man whom I fell in love with…
“Christopher…” Rose shuffled down the couch and took his hand. He flinched when she reached for it, but then relaxed as she pulled it into her chest. “I don’t care.”
He leaned back. “You… Rose, do you understand what I told you?”
“Oh, so you think I am stupid now?”
“What?” His eyes widened. “That is not –”
“I am joking, Christopher,” she said with light laughter. “I know you don’t think that. Just as I know you don’t really think that what you have told me is going to make any difference to how I feel about you.”
“It…. it doesn’t?” A flash of hope passed behind his eyes.
“Of course not, silly,” she laughed as she moved closer so that they were sitting right beside one another. “When I first married you, Christopher, do you know what my main issue was with you?”
“I am sure there were many things…”
She laughed. “First and foremost, I did not think you were real. From the day I met you, I knew there was more to you than what you were showing me. I knew that there had to be another side of you, one that I could fall in love with. And to learn that I was right, and that now I will have a chance to see that side…” She allowed her smile to grow. “The only thing that I am upset about is that it didn’t happen sooner.”
“Rose…” He squeezed her hand as he looked into her eyes. “I don’t know what to say.”
“I find often that when you don’t know what to say, saying nothing is what works best.”
Indeed, there was nothing left to say. Christopher had confessed, Rose had accepted his apology, and there was now just the one thing left to do. Better yet, both of them seemed to know it.
Rose made sure to find her husband’s eyes, and her heart swelled when she saw life behind them. This was the real him. This was the man she had wanted to marry. And this was the man with whom she would be spending the rest of her life. She smiled for him, he smiled back, and then she leaned forward to kiss him.
Christopher did not hesitate to accept the kiss, and when their lips met, all the hurt and pain and suffering felt across the last week faded as if it had never been. That single kiss spoke truer words than anything Christopher had said, and Rose felt in that kiss the love he claimed to hold her in.
They kissed deeply and passionately. They kissed without care. They kissed not as if the world was about to end, but as if it was just now starting. They had their whole lives to live together, and those lives started with a kiss.
