More butterflies fly around in my gut when his full lips move up into another smirk. “Really?” His eyes light up when he mouths the question. Andy's beaming smile never leaves hisface, and it's so damn contagious; however, I only return his question with an enthusiastic nod.
The class continues, but I don't listen to the lecture. I can't, not when my mind is somewhat else. Instead of writing my detailed notes, I'm staring at the tall and bright pink ends of his coal strands. Would he let me touch them one day? The ends look sharp enough to pierce through skin.
“Alright, that's it for today.” The loud bell rings over the intercom, but Mr. Ferguson’s voice carries over its blaring chime. “Don't forget to study. There's a test on Friday!” He calls out after the students who are already lining up in rows and filing out of the class. Everyone is so eager to carry on with their day. All except for me.
Other than the halls and the cafeteria during lunch, it's the last time I'll see Andrew, and there's an emptiness in my gut I can't help but feel. Will I miss him?
Before our past weekend of nonstop conversations, seeing him once a day was routine. The interactions we once had were meaningless, but now, history is suddenly my favorite class. “So…” I start to stammer, clinching onto the straps of my bookbag as it hangs loosely on my shoulders.
“So… What?” He counters, stuffing his books into his.
“I guess I'll see you on MySpace…” The way he looks at me makes me so nervous, so much that the freckles across my nose and cheeks are now highlighted in red.
“I'll be waiting by my keyboard.” He teases while lacing his arms through his straps. I don't know how to respond, and it feels like the soles of my shoes are stuck to the tile. “...Are you okay? Class is over…” His head is bent to meet my gaze as he stands in front of me, but I have to tilt my neck up to see the playful regard in his eyes. I've never realized how tall he was before. Or how there are specks of teal in his sapphire orbs.
“Oh… Uh… Yeah. We don't want to be late.” The many keychains attached to the zippers click together when I turn quickly to make my way out of the room.
“Ladies first…” His loud boots step behind me, and my anxiety forces me to pick up speed.
We're halfway through Monday, but my day is dragging on. I'm counting down the hours until I can be home in my room typing away in a message box. I'm not sure how long cheer practice lasts, but I'll be waiting for as long as it takes.
I've caught short glimpses of her in the halls between classes, and I've matched them with flirtatious winks. It's cute how bashful she becomes when no one else notices. Will she still act this way when we pass each other in the cafeteria?God, I hope so.
Candi packs her lunches in a hot pink lunch box. Today, it's a turkey and lettuce wrap with cheese, apple slices, 3D Doritos, and a bottle of water. I'm a bit envious when I sit down at mytable across the room from hers. Not of the food, although I'm not sure what the school decided to feed us. The menu said it's lasagna, but I've never seen the dish resemble this before. I don't think anyone would call this meat layered between the long noodles. No, I'm envious of the group of carbon copies she sits with.
I want to be the one next to her, making her laugh. One class out of the day isn't enough. Her figure goes out of my view as more of her friends move in next to her.Damn it.I don't care how much of a stalker it makes me appear; if I can get her to look this way, even for a minute, it would make my entire fucking day.
“Hey, you got the lasagna surprise too!” Seth's laugh interrupts my view of Candi’s table.
“Yeah. The other choice didn't look appetizing.” I quickly move my eyes towards the mystery meat on my tray.
“What? You guys didn't want whatever the fuck this is?” Rayne picks up a knockoff version of the McRib between two hamburger buns and plops it back down onto his Styrofoam plate. Both options are teetering on edible.
“Nah, man, that thing looks like it could grow legs and walk off the table,” Seth explains with a mouth full of food.
“Swallow, and then speak. Fucking pig.” Rayne chuckles to himself before taking a drink from his red Gatorade. “So… Andrew. Where'd you go Friday?”
“What do you mean?” I ask, poking around in the concoction of food on my plate. “I was at your house, and then I went home.”
“Yeah, but you usually stay all weekend…”Do I tell him what he said got under my skin, and I didn't want to think Candi wouldn't go for me because I'm not in her group of popular friends? Nah, I'll just give him the usual excuse.
“Had to get home. Dad hasn't been at the house in a few days, and my mom has been living on the couch. It's been a fuckingmess.” It isn't a lie. My mom isn't taking care of herself or the house, and my dad, who the hell knows where he's been.
“Damn, man, that sucks.” Seth's sympathetic look sends a punch to my gut, but that's life. It is what it is.
“Yeah, it does. But what can you do?” He looks at me blankly as I shrug my shoulders and take a drink from my chocolate milk carton.
“Well, let's forget about all of that shit,” Rayne begins. “We're getting closer to the Valentine’s Day show. Have you guys sold any tickets?” He rests his arms across the table and impatiently waits for our answers. I can feel his anxiety running through him when he repeatedly taps the heel of his boot on the tile.
“I've got some people lined up.” Seth’s voice rises over the loud chatter in the cafeteria. No, he doesn't. He uses the same line before every show, and I'll be surprised if his girlfriend shows up as he promised. Honestly, I'm shocked he's kept her as long as he has. Seth has never been one for committed relationships.
“Awesome. What about you, Andrew?” Rayne’s expression goes from annoyed to eager. He knows I don't have anyone coming to watch me, but I always sell out of my allotted tickets. I usually end up seeking out fans on MySpace or Xanga and meeting them at local places like the mall or the gas station near my house.
“Uh… yeah. I'll get it handled.” My attention moves somewhere else, and my voice trails off.I can see her now.Candi’s smile comes into view, and at this moment, it's all I care about. If I could take all of the useless memories I have moving around in my head and replace them with images of her smiling, I would in a fucking heartbeat.
“I know you will, bro.” He playfully slaps me on my shoulder. “We only have a couple of weeks before this gig, and that means only a couple more practices. You guys think you'll be ready?”
What did he just ask? My mind is somewhere else. I can only see the girl several tables away from me, laughing about something one of her friends just whispered in her ear. Damn, I wish that were me. Just the thought of being that close to her ignites a fire under my skin. I want so badly to smell the addictive scent of her coconut shampoo. Would she shudder from the hot air from my breath or the feel of my lips on her sensitive skin? God, I fucking hope so.
