“Don’t give up hope, sweetie. You’re beautiful, you’re smart, you’re kind, and if that idiot couldn’t see that, it’s his loss,” Mom assures her. “Are you in town all break?”
“I’m on the cheerleading squad, so I’ll need to be back just before New Year’s. You know the drill.” She speaks to my mother, but eyes my brothers.
“That we do.” Mom laughs warmly and my heart aches. “You girls should go to the mall or the movies while you’re both here. Lord, I remember you practicing routines for those cheerleader tryouts.”
“Savvy tried so hard,” Kinsey manages to make it sound like praise, but I cringe at the nickname she knows I hate.
I spent an entire summer helping Kinsey perfect her routine, but I’d never actually planned on joining the squad. I much preferred cheering from the sidelines, even before I was told I got too distracted by the game.
“I wasn’t letting my sister get pawed by all my teammates,” Dallas points out, as if that was why I never made it.
“Always so protective.” Kinsey shoots Dallas a look I can’t quite decipher, but for once she sounds more hurt than catty. “Speaking of, I was so sorry to hear about Ethan. He sounded so…nice.”
My blood turns to ice, but Clay clenches his fist so hard his knuckles are white.
“I never liked him,” he growls, which isn’t true. He just – unfortunately – knows why we broke up. I gently place my hand on his leg and give him what I hope is a reassuring look before he breaks something.
“Summer flings and long distance are so hard to navigate.” Brenda gives me an encouraging smile.
“He goes to MIT,” Kinsey reminds everyone. “A stone’s throw from BU, so we often run into him at parties. Especially when I was still with Kevin, given how much he loves sports. He’d do almost anything to score tickets to games.”
I wince, because either Ethan told her what happened, or she just knows, which feeds all my insecurities.
“Oh, I remember he loved meeting Clay’s teammates. I thought he might faint.” Mom smiles, completely oblivious to the fact she just supported Kinsey’s allegation that he was only ever with me for my brother, which isn’t true. It’s just why he stayed with me.
“He didn’t deserve Sav anyway.” Dallas wraps his arm around my shoulders, as if that could save me from the thinly veiled attacks.
“Oh, hush, Sav broke that poor boy’s heart when she ended things,” Mom argues, because she only caught the tail end of our conversation, and only my side, so it probably sounded like he was begging me to take him back, not hoping I’d still let him and his two best friends keep their tickets. I did, then Clay put me in the WAG box so I wouldn’t have to sit with them. “You tell that boy we say hi next time you see him.”
A bunch of different conversations take place over the next hour, my mom popping in and out to check on the food, so I spend a lot of time helping her so I can avoid Kinsey. After dinner, Kinsey takes my seat, speaking softly to Dallas, who looks like he’s struggling to stay polite, while Clay discusses his team’s prospects with Mr. Crowley.
I’m about to pretend I’m tired so I can go upstairs and write, but Brenda calls me over.
“How’ve you been, Savannah? I feel like I haven’t seen you since last Christmas. I’m just getting the CliffsNotes from your mother.”
“I’m good,” I assure her. “Just busy.”
“I hear you love that summer camp, and something about not upsetting you while you’re holding a bow and arrow.”
“I was a bit of a menace at first, but I improved. They have a lot of activities that are empowering or just fun to blow off steam, and the camp is amazing at making everyone feel welcome and capable. Most of the kids come back for years, which is nice.”
“So I’ll miss you this summer as well?”
“I’ll try to stop by.” I give her a sad smile, because she’s right. Brenda was my second mom all through…most of my life. Kinsey has been terrible to me, but she hasn’t shunned my mom, and I’ve missed Brenda. It’s just hard when I’ve become the girl who can’t trust herself not to fall for assholes who will hurt her, so she instead hides away and doesn’t let most people in. Except Izzie and her brother, who will most likely break my heart, yet I can’t seem to stay away.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Noah
No Notes
Peaches
Killing it! Tell Brooks his stick handling is a thing of beauty.
Me
Definitely not.
