“Is that what you think this is about?” he asked. “That we were discovered in that house?”
“I don’t know what to think this is about, Mr. Evergreen, but I did not think you were the type to let people’s opinions shape your actions. Oh, yet here we are!”
Cyrus all but whipped the belt he held, then gripped it tighter, taking a long, measured step in my direction. “I don’t!”
“Just admit to your bruised vanity so that we may move past it, please,” I said. “You’re always going on about how you are perceived. Get over it, will you?”
He seethed, flashing his teeth. “You humbleme,”he spat.
“You humble yourself. I didn’taskyou to carry me into that house, Mr. Evergreen! I didn’t ask you to spend your time with me! You made those choices, and you should’ve left me in the dirt!”
“Youshould have higher standards for the company you keep if you think that’s any way to treat a woman, or even a person who isn’t an evil crook!”
“Yeah? What should I think about men who get unsuspecting Princessesdrunkin the middle of the forest, then?”
He gawked. “Thatwas a dual effort! I did not force you to drink, nor did I know that you were unseasoned to wine. You’re the world’s brattiest brat! I assumed you had access to such luxury! I only asked for your company.”
“And I only asked that you talk to me!” I said. “But you?—”
“No!” he cried, immediately catching himself. “No,” he said softer. “Youaskedme if I feltsparks.”Then he was within a foot of me. I could see the rise and fall of his chest; I couldhearit. His ragged breathing made mine louder, too. “Then you turned around and pouted your cute little lips at your beloved fiancé, and you asked him to have me escort you to the place where he willmarryyou.” His eyes dropped to my mouth as everything else about the moment took on an injured ambience. “Do youhaveanyidea how much Idon’twant to do that?” he asked. “The very idea of being in that room… it…”
I trembled, trying to nod, orshakemy head, or anything.
With another pant, he said, “You didn't evenreadmy letter. You just send it back as it was.”
“Let-Letter?” I muttered. “I did... I didn’t receive a letter. Did you send me one?”
Cyrus sat in my words for a second longer, finally allowing his mood to taper. “...What kind of man would not apologize for hurting you like that?”
“I… I… You didn’t-I,” I stumbled. Years ofemptycorrespondence flooded back into the caverns of my heart. “Sir, I absolutely would have responded to a letter you sent. I promise you.” My hands fell from my skirt, brushing my thighs, and as he turned away from me, I followed suit in a few steps. “Iwouldhave! I swear toGod.”
I heard him sigh.
“I wanted to see you,” I confessed. “I tried to see you, but Ser Elías told me no. Had there been a letter, I would have felt less… less alone in my melancholia. I would have written you back. I would have… I didn’t receive a letter, sir.”
“You wanted to see me?” he asked.
“Yes, butElías.Hescolded me. He’s very devout to his beliefs, and he believes he is protecting me from you.Why?I don’t understand. You’ve never injured me, but why, why would I ignore your words? Why would I…. If Iknewyou wanted-? You wanted to speak to me?”
“I did,” he said. He paused. “Sometimes… Sometimes I am slow to think of meaningful things in serious moments, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t care. I just… Svana, I don’t want to never speak to you again. I can’t endure the silence.”
“I would have answered you, I swear it. Nay, I vow it. I am no stranger to ignored communication, and even if it hadcome months after this moment, I would have replied, even if I wanted… if I did not want… to see you again. Which, in case that is unclear, is not reality.”
Mr. Evergreen’s shoulders drooped. I knew he wanted to believe me, maybe he did, but it was another moment longer before he turned, and I could see more of his face.
“I would’ve responded,” I promised.
He found his temples with the balls of his fingers, circling them. “This is aterriblething,” he said. “You, you being here. It’s a bad idea. Sam will just have to find somebody else to escort you around. I’m not the man for it.”
My mind wandered, seeking the ends of every vein along his arms. “I don’t want some other man for anything,” I swore. “I want you.”
We both peered at the other, and then I said it again, emboldened by the quiet, non-existent response.
“I want you, Mr. Evergreen,” I said.
“The way you say that-”
“I know what it implies,” I said. “It is what I meant.”
