“And for what?” I begged.“Formyrequest. How will he recoverfine,Ser? How willI?”
“You are young, fortunately,” he replied. “You’ll find that pain fades with age.”
“Is that the lie I should believe or the one you tell yourself?” I asked.
He laughed. “As sharp as your mother.”
“My mother is dead. I never knew her, and your comparison is useless to me. If you have nothing else-”
“She loved you,” he said. “You don’t have to hear it if you don’t wish to, but I will say it all the same. Eliza loved you, and she would love how brave you are.”
I sighed.“I’m not brave at all,”I said.
“Your house; Eisson, it means iron. Two hundred years of faithful, unrusted reign in this very castle, the very throne your father holds now. You are led by the sword, by war. Youarebrave. It’s in your blood. You are stronger than you think in this moment, and you will survive it despite your best efforts to escape it. It isn’t in you to give up.”
“Is that supposed to be comforting?” I asked. “I’m to be miserably strong forever?”
He took an uneven breath. “With your mother gone, I fear time was never taken to explain what it means to be her kin... To be a Rós. She very much would’ve liked to have told you such things.”
“Then she should’ve,” I said.
Elías’s jaw tensed as he explained. “Your mother would’ve said that the Royal are chosen by God Himself. For many things, all great. Great opportunity, greatdestiny, great pain. But to be a Rós, that is something far more powerful.”
“More powerful than God?” I croaked. “No wonder she was mad.”
“She’d say, while a countess’s or any other lady’s life is important, a princess’s future isnecessaryfor the progression of her empire. She’d say that because of that, the Róses were always destined to weave their way into the Crown, come Hell or high water.”
“What are you even on about?” I asked.
“I’m saying that, by fate, one day you will be Queen, Svana. It is why you were born; it’s your purpose. And it willnotbe easy. No, but there will be joy. And like your mother, you will sire an heir for your King and for your country, and they will be ofnobleblood, and he orshewill rule when you pass on.”
“Ah, noble blood,” I said. “Of course.”
“Days like the other will come and go; boys will come and go, but youmustbe faithful to the life God has chosen for you, Princess. You must.”
“What would my mother say if I refused her plan for me?” I asked.
“She would say it’s not up to you. She’d tell you fate is not a choice; fate is always in motion. Acceptance of it only makes your trials easier to bear.”
“She escaped,” I said.
“Svana.”
“Ilovedhim, Elías,” I whispered. “I loved him more than anything. Than anything! Do you understand? More than the Castle, or the Crown, or Father, or–”
“Love is a powerful word,” he said.
“What other word is there that fits inside thismassivehole?” I asked. “I wake up every morning with Willem in my mind. I sneak out every day to see his face, to listen to him moan about nonsense and ideology I do not understand. He’s not like the other boys I’ve met. He does not want my gold, or the Crown, or a title for himself. He does not brag about who his father is or whom he knows. He may not be an earl’s son, butheis brave. And he is kind, and he is honest, and now he’s gone, all because he wanted to be a knight, and I– I promised him that life. I did, no one else. Does that mean anything?”
“Aye, but-”
“I lovedhim,” I cried.
“...Then I am sorry.”
“Your sorry does not take away his screams,” I said. I sank my head into my hands. “I still hear them, you know? And now I must suffer for my sins.”
“Svana, you are meant to rule, not fall in love. And I know it isn’t fair, but you cannot allow yourself to become tangled in ostler boys.”
