“Come, Svana. They were just words.”
“Words?” I gawked. “Is that all our talks have been to you? Words?”
“Ehh. I beg you, Your Highness,” he said. He was frowning. “Is that what you want? You want me to beg? Do not tease me in this way. This? Then? Swords and Horses is a game. I understand that. Don’t confuse me.”
“In what manner do I confuse you, Ser?”
“Inthat.With the Ser,” he urged. “I’m not a knight; I’m not a lord; I’m not a king. I’m not a man of any title; I never will be.”
“We made a promise!”
“It was just that!” He searched for the answer. “It was just words. A game, Svana. A lofty dream at best.”
“All summer,” I said. He shook his head. “All summer since you and your father arrived, I–I–! You’re my friend. My–? You’ll say you meant nothing of what you’ve promised me?”
“I will always protect you,” he said. “But I am limited in how that looks in the future.”
“Why?”
“Why?” he asked. “Because. Because of what I am. Because of what I’m not. Because I’m fifteen now, and I may go off to war and die tomorrow. And sure, Imightlive to take over as ostler when my father goes, but it’s not a guarantee. We’ve moved around a lot. What if your father replaces us before then? What if something comes up? What if the Plague does make it this far north? I’ll be lucky if we stay near King’s Land, but if we can’t…. We won’t see each other if I’m not here.”
“My father won’t fire yours; I won’t allow it,” I said. “And I won’t allow you to get the Plague.”
“Even if you controlled that sort of thing, what about when you marry and have children with some duke?” he asked. “I should be happy for you?”
“What will it matter if you’re my Knight?” I wondered. “I’ll see you every day.”
“But I won’t be,” he said.
“By your own decision if not. I offer it to you on a silver plate; you refuse?” I asked.
“You cannot make me a knight,” he said.
“I can do whatever I want!” I snapped.
I reached into the dirt and lifted his stick, pointing it at him. Willem took a step back and showed me his palms.
“If I wanted to, I could bind you to the Oath right here, right now,” I warned. “And what choice would you have but to bow to your Queen and rise her Sword?”
Neither of us said anything. I glanced at the shaking branch and dropped it.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’m so sorry. I’m so embarrassed.”
Willem grinned.
“Stop it,” I said. “It’s not funny. I will not be mocked for my passion. And I will not be wed and bred like some horse. I will make my own choices, just like you. So. So there!”
“...You do mean it?” he asked. “Youdopromise to… to knight me? I’m not even a squire.”
“Your dreams are not a game to me, Ser.” I stopped. “I’m sorry. Willem,” I corrected. “You confided in me whom you wished to be. It is a good Queen that helps her soldiers be it. It matters not to me if you’re a squire; your heart and your bravery are where the purpose lies.”
“The squire thing might matter to Ser Elías.”
“When IamQueen,”I said. I rocked on my heel, gathering my hands for courage. I fought to draw the nerve back into my throat. “Youwillbe my Knight. My bravest Knight.MySword. No one else's anything. Oreia needs good men, and that is a fact that everyone, even the Lord Commander, will have to live with. Do you understand?”
His lips moved, bending his smile to something more.
“Is that right, Your Highness?” he asked.
