Her mom opened her mouth, then closed it again, searching for words.Lydia didn't give her the chance.
"He didn't want us in his world back then," she said."So why should I believe he wants me in it now?"
Her mom stepped forward, hands twisting together."Because he didn't send us away to get rid of us.He sent us away because he thought he was protecting us.He thought his membership with Royalla would put a target on our backs.In those early years, the club was struggling.They hadn't yet earned their place.From what he's said, their territory has grown massively."She paused."Not a day goes by that he hasn't regretted sending me away."
Lydia shook her head."That's easy to say now."
Her mom's voice cracked."You can't blame him.If you have to, blame me.I'm the one who trusted the wrong person, who got us mixed up with the Cusclan Motorcycle Club.Baker didn't know they'd take the money.He didn't know I'd lose everything.He thought he was saving us."
Lydia swallowed hard, her throat tight."Then why didn't he come for us when it was safe?Why didn't he check?Why didn't he try?"
"He did," her mom whispered."Every month.Every letter.Every dollar.He took my silence and the fact that the post office box was emptied each month as a sign that we were okay.He thought I was using the money to take care of you."
Lydia's breath hitched.
Her mom stepped closer, eyes pleading."Trust me, I gave up hope.I thought he stopped loving me.I fell into a depression when you were little that I didn't think I'd ever escape.But he never stopped caring.He never stopped trying.He just didn't know the truth."
Lydia pressed her palms to her eyes, trying to breathe through the ache in her chest.
Her mom's voice softened."And things are different now.You're grown.You're strong.You're not a baby he has to hide from the world.And Baker...he's not the same man he was back then either.He was always older than me, but he's getting old.He's admitted that he doesn't actively ride with the club anymore."
Lydia lowered her hands, staring at the floor."What does talking to him do for me?"
Her whole life was centered around what her mom wanted.She dreamed about doing something for herself.Dreamed about escaping.She had a chance now with Baddy.She had someone to love and someone to love her.
Her mom hesitated, then said quietly, "Because you finally have people who want you.People who will fight for you.Because you deserve a family that shows up for you."
Lydia's throat tightened.
"And because," her mom added, voice trembling, "you're not alone anymore.You have Baddy.You have Royalla.And you have a father who would give anything to know you."
Lydia closed her eyes.She wasn't sure she believed in family.Not the kind she always fantasized about, like in the photos.
A pang stole her breath.The photo album.
"When I was little, you gave me a photo album," she whispered.
Her mom bowed her head."It was your favorite thing in the world."
"Where did you get it?"
"Oh, baby."Her mom raised her head and met her gaze."Baker gave that to me to give to our child when you were old enough."
A sob escaped."You didn't tell me."
"It was too hard to explain.You were a child."
"Oh, God."She grabbed her head.
She needed Baddy.She needed his arms around her.She needed the way he held her together when she was on the verge of falling apart.She needed him to stand between her and the world.
That was real.
That was something worth fighting for.
Baddy was the family she chose.
She opened her eyes, meeting her mom's gaze."I'll talk to Baker."
