As she realized that, she wondered if people still did that anymore, or if her generation was one of the last to experience it. After all, when was the last time she or anyone she knew had a dinner party like the ones her parents used to attend?
Snapping her fingers, she remembered. Juliette had hosted a housewarming party nearly ten years ago, and they ended up fighting about it. She couldn’t even remember what they had argued over.
Then, a cold sensation clamped in her stomach as the details resurfaced. She remembered saying something about “perfect wife, perfect life,” and Juliette had lost her temper, yelling that just because Sylvie’s love life was terrible didn’t mean everyone else’s was easy. They didn’t speak for weeks after that.
It was Sylvie’s mom who finally got them talking again. She tricked them into bumping into each other, then baited them into admitting why the other’s actions had upset them so much. There was a good chance that without Annette, Sylvie and Juliette wouldn’t still be friends.
A wave of crushing sadness hit her then, remembering how her mom had worked so hard to get them on the same page, even just in the same room.
She gasped sharply as a sob caught her unexpectedly, nearly causing her to spill her martini. Tears streaked down herface as she pressed her hand over her mouth to quiet the sound. She missed her mom so intensely that it felt like a constant ache in her bones.
It’s not fair!she thought, screaming the words inside her head.Why do I have to lose everyone?
These waves of grief had surprised her once or twice since she had been on the island, and when they came, it felt like they would never end.
“Ma’am?” a quiet voice behind her said.
Holding her breath, she turned to see the concierge, appearing rather concerned.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
She nodded weakly. “Yes. I’m so sorry. I, um, lost my mother recently, and—”
“No need to explain, ma’am,” he said. “I understand.”
“Thank you,” Sylvie said with a small smile. “And sorry—”
“Please, ma’am, don’t apologize,” he said, smiling back before continuing. “And pardon me, but a gentleman was asking for you—says he’s a friend of yours. Mr. Luke Preston?”
Her eyes widened. “Yes, he’s an old friend. He’s looking for me?”
“Yes, ma’am. Shall I let him know you’re here?”
She nodded, and he went to fetch Luke as she scrambled to make herself look halfway decent—or, at the very least, like she hadn’t been crying. Of course, she had left her handbag upstairs in her room, so all she could do was fix her mascara using the front-facing camera on her phone.
“Hey,” Luke said, making her jump.
“Oh, hi! Sorry!” Turning to look at him, she watched his face fall. She must look worse than she thought.
“Are you okay?” he asked, stepping closer and placing a hand on her arm.
A heavy tear escaped her control and rolled down her cheek. “I’m fine!” she said, laughing as Luke raised an eyebrow. “I promise! It’s just…I caught myself thinking about my mom, and it kind of hit me all over again that she’s gone, you know?”
He nodded. “I know. It’s hard when it jumps out at you like that—feels like being ambushed by your own brain.”
“A little bit, yeah,” she said, thinking about it. “And it’s weird. Every time it happens, it feels like…I don’t know. Like I’m fine for a few days, I even enjoy myself a little, then there are these waves of grief. It never really goes away, but when it hits, it’s like no time has passed at all. It feels like I’m stuck there, and the time in between was a hallucination or something.”
Luke squeezed her arm gently, and she felt her skin tingle where his fingers touched her. “I think I know the feeling.”
She barely heard him, though—she was completely inside her own thoughts. It was good of him to make her feel listened to, she supposed.
She sighed heavily, as if annoyed with herself. “And I know it’s kind of dumb, but I just don’t want to be here, feeling hidden away in a backroom bar with only a club sandwich in my room on offer, you know?”
“Let’s get out of here, then. There’s a seafood place down by the water I’ve been wanting to go to for days.” He sounded unsure, but the determination on his face made her smile.
“Sure,” she said. “Let’s go. I just need to get my purse.”
“Why? You’re not for paying for anything,” he replied. “Dinner is on me, okay?”
