Mrs. Towler jabbed her forefinger at him. “Elizabeth would be ill at this.”
He stiffened. How the very sound of his wife’s name stopped him short. Would it always? But Mrs. Towler knew this. She was using Elizabeth’s name as a weapon. It was his weakness—a knife to an open wound.
But as painful as her words were, this arrangement, this sense of being suspended in time, was killing him. “This has nothing to do with any romantic feelings toward Miss Hale. But I assure you when and if the time comes when I shall feel such feelings again, such inclinations are mine and mine alone. I need no one’s consent.”
“How dare you.How dare you!” Tears pooled in her eyes. “You know full well what Elizabeth would have wanted.”
“She’s not here! How I wish she were, but she’s not.”
“So you are determined, then, to undermine Elizabeth’s wishes?”
“This is not about Elizabeth.”
“It will always be about Elizabeth, as far as her daughters are concerned.” Her tone approached a shout.
James refused to break eye contact with her. “Maria and Rose are my daughters too.”
A silent battle for control raged. He’d always treated Mrs. Towler with the utmost respect. She was, after all, his late wife’s mother and his children’s only living grandparent.
But the lines were blurred—and those lines needed to be redrawn.
The ice in her glare froze him. “I will never cease acting in their best interest.”
“Neither will I. So you have a choice, Mrs. Towler. You are welcomehere. You always will be. You are family. But I will not be crossed. Not on this.”
Commotion sounded at the door. Rachel appeared in the threshold. “My goodness!” she exclaimed, a little laugh on her lips and an apple held loosely in her hand. “Why does everyone look so serious? You are not still arguing about me, are you?”
Mrs. Towler whirled to face Rachel. “For heaven’s sake, girl, despite your best efforts, not every conversation in this house is about you.” She threw her napkin down and brushed past Rachel as she exited the room.
Rachel, confused, peered at James for clarification. “What’s upsetting her?”
He straightened in his chair and drew a deep breath. “I’ve come to a decision about the governess for Maria and Rose.”
“I thought that was settled?”
“A change of plans. I’ve spoken with Miss Hale and decided that she will oversee the girls.”
“You’re in earnest? She’ll be living here?”
“Yes, as a governess. I thought she’d be company for you as well.”
“Oh, I adore her!” Rachel clasped her hands together in front of her and then dropped them dramatically as if a great idea had formed. “May I be allowed to prepare her chamber? I think there is one near mine with a window that—”
“She’s not here as a guest, Rachel. You must remember. The room off the nursery will suit her fine.”
“When is she to arrive?”
“Tomorrow.”
She threw her arms around him, kissed his cheek, and was out the door as quickly as she appeared.
He listened as the tapping of her feet faded away. At least Rachel was pleased with his decision. It was good to see her enthusiasm after months of melancholy brooding.
Even so, doubt chided him. The silence that Rachel’s departure left only magnified it, leaving empty spaces for the questions to reverberate.
Mrs. Towler’s words about Elizabeth had stung. It was his biggest fear—to make a decision that would dishonor his wife. She was never far from his thoughts. He doubted she ever would be, regardless of what developments occurred. But Elizabeth had also trusted him. Had she not told him so many times during their marriage?
He departed the small breakfast room. He’d made one member of the household irate and one ecstatic. It was impossible to please everyone. He just had to do what he believed to be right.
