I cleared my throat. “I wanted to discuss your offer—the one you proposed when I first arrived.”
Lord Paxton tilted his head, curiosity filling his features. “Oh? What about it?”
“From the beginning, I was not particularly fond of it. I’ve become less inclined to accept it the longer I stay here.” I rushed to continue when his brows furrowed. “That is not to say that I do not…that is…I still wish to marry Annette. I simply cannot do it with the promise of financial gain hanging over me. It is not fair to her. I never should have accepted it in the first place. So, I come to you now to request your blessing free of such stipulations.”
The viscount studied me for a long moment. “Have you proposed to her?”
“Not yet. I wished to dissolve our agreement first. I have reason to hope she will accept my proposal and plan to have that conversation with her the moment we finish.”
Lord Paxton scratched at his beard. His facial hair had grown in since my arrival. I had never seen the man unshaven while in London. It seemed the more time he spent abed, the less he worried about such things. I could not blame him.
“Why do you care so much about not taking the money?” he asked.
“As I said, it is not fair to her. She deserves better than for someone to marry her simply for money.”
“So, as you are still intent on marrying her without the money, I suppose you have a better reason.” One of his graying brows rose, and a smug grin pulled at his lips.
My stomach sank. Down, down, down until it reached my toes. It remained there, heavy-leaden as an anchor cast into the sea. I did have a reason, but to admit it to Lord Paxton before confessing fully to Annette felt backwards.
“I care for her,” I said slowly. “Annette’s happiness is important to me. Were she to learn of our agreement, she would most certainlynotbe happy. You mentioned your belief that she fears marriage. You were not wrong in that assumption. It is the possibility that a man might present false affections and then change after vows are exchanged that scares her. Were I to take the money, I would become such a man, at least partially.”
“Partially, in that your affections are in no way false,” he stated.
Was the man determined to pull out a confession? Part of me hated that knowing look in his eyes. As if he had anticipated this all along. Since I arrived. Perhaps even before…
My brows furrowed. Had he anticipated it? It certainly explained the smugness he wore. It explained his insistence when I arrived that Annette and I would make a good match.
“You appear agitated with me,” Lord Paxton said with no trace of penitence.
“I cannot decide whether to be agitated or grateful.”
He chuckled. “One can often be both.”
I heaved a sigh. “Was this your plan all along? The reason you left me the invitation to visit?”
Lord Paxton’s grin grew. “May I speak plainly with you, Edward?” He continued when I nodded. “I believe your regard for my daughter goes far beyond caring. It’s deeply rooted in your heart and has been for some time. My offer to you was never about the money. Do not misunderstand me. I am more than willing to provide the funds to assist in your political endeavors, but they were, to a point, a means to an end. I suspected you were falling in love with Annette in London, and she with you. Our sudden departure—a departure borne of my condition—diluted the odds of a match between the two of you. Suspecting what I did, I could not allow my health to have such consequences. Not when I truly believed the two of you could be happy together.”
“So you invited me here.”
“Yes, with the hopes that simply putting the two of you in the same place, at the same time, would solidify what had already begun to take root and grow. Your relationship needed the chance to blossom, and it has. The money was nothing more than encouragement to keep you here. Another attempt to wield time in my favor.” He smiled wryly. “I’ve not much of it left to make use of. Every moment counted.”
I ran a hand down my face, biting back a groan. I had been hoodwinked by a sickly old man, but I could not even be angry about it. Without his interference, I may never have given the idea of marrying Annette real consideration. Certainly not the idea of marrying her for love.
Love. Love. Love. The word echoed in my mind, making my heart sputter.
“This doesn’t change anything,” I said. “Regardless of how I came to be here, my reason for speaking with you today remains. I cannot accept the money for marrying Annette. I will not.”
The viscount nodded. “Very well. I will have the contract thrown into the fire when it arrives if it will ease your conscience.”
“It would,” I replied, barely restraining my amusement. “And since I intend to do things the proper way, I must ask for your blessing.”
Lord Paxton swatted at the air. “You know you have it, Edward. I never would have done any of this if you didn’t.”
“Perhaps, but it does my heart good to hear it all the same.”
“Well, go on then. Go speak with her. I know you must be desperate for it.”
He had no idea. Or…perhaps he did. It was no secret that Lord Paxton loved his wife. I offered a bow, and as I left his chamber, I could not help imagining him as a younger man, one eager to speak to his lady and propose their shared future together. What joy they must have felt in that moment.
