Laughter glinted in her eyes. It was no secret that she took great pleasure in finding matches for her sons. With one successful pairing under her belt, all her focus settled on me. Having been at sea nearly my entire adult life, I didn’t begrudge her efforts.
Not that I wished to wed at present, but I valued the opportunity to spend time with her. Letters only allowed so much of a connection. I did not know my parents as well as I would have liked.
“I will find you a match. A proper and respectable one. There has been more than enough interest.” She sipped her tea, eyeing me over the rim of her cup. “Of course, you seem to have already taken an interest in someone.”
I rolled my eyes and stole a tart from the tea tray. “We’ve been through this, Mother. Miss Apsley and I were friends, nothing more. As she has left Town, there is no reason for you to continue scheming on that front.”
She shrugged, though her amusement remained. “Scheming is never a waste of time. I find it exciting. Parties and balls are all well and good, but the chance to see my son settled?” One of her dark brows lifted. “What more could I wish for?”
I smiled, but it was a bit forced. “I do not have time for a wife, Mother.” I set my empty cup down.
“If men waited until they had time, they would never marry. Your father certainly would not have.”
She was correct about that. Father, busy man that he was, could be terribly focused. It was that very stubborn, single-mindedness that had brought our family financial success through various business deals. Mother had never begrudged Father the amount of time he spent working for our family’s gain, but then, how could she when she reaped the benefits directly? Theirs was not a love match, and she seemed unbothered by his absence.
If I wanted the same success in my personal endeavors, I required that same focus. It worked for Father, and it would work for me. I intended to marry one day, but that was far, far in the future. Until I could devote time to a wife, I would not take one. Simple.
I sighed and leaned forward to pat Mother’s hand. “Rest assured, you will be the first person to know when I am ready. Then, I will welcome your scheming.”
She smiled indulgently. “I look forward to it, darling, but you needn’t put it off. A man can devote his time in multiple ways, you know.”
Father never did. The words snagged on my tongue, and I bit them down. It would only sting to voice them. “I should speak with Father. I need to leave Town for a while.”
“Leave?” She frowned.
“Yes. A visit to Kent.”
Her frown reversed, as if it were never there. “Kent is lovely. Lord and Lady Paxton live there.”
I was acutely aware. A note sitting on the desk in my chamber had ensured it.
“Indeed?” I feigned surprise.
Mother smirked. She did not believe my pretended ignorance.
“That is not why I’m for Kent,” I added.
“Your father is in his study,” she said, ignoring my retort. “But you must be quick if you wish to catch him. I believe he is leaving soon for some meeting.”
I nodded my thanks and stood. She did as well, pulling me into an embrace to bid me safe travels. And luck. Not the sort of luck I needed, but I supposed it was to be appreciated all the same.
I left the room and made my way to Father’s study. I rapped on the door three times.
“Enter!” his muffled shout echoed from within.
Father sat at his desk, a pair of spectacles perched on his round nose. Candlelight reflected off the glass and his dark brown eyes, a rich color that mine mimicked. In truth, I mimicked him in many ways. Mother often mentioned how much I resembled Father, though time had wrinkled his features, and we were both gifted with the kind of fierce determination to achieve our goals that Mother referred to as peak stubbornness.
“Edward,” Father said with a gentle tone. “You’ve that look about you again. Am I to expect another plea from you so soon?”
“I would rather call it a beseechment to your conscience.”
Father chuckled. “Call it what you wish, but my answer has not changed.”
I fought my frustrations, shoving them down to keep my voice calm. “But can you not see how much good we could do? Things need to change. There are people suffering, and I cannot think you wish to sit and do nothing when—”
“Of course, I would like to see change as much as the next man. But I am not a titled gentleman, nor do I have a desire to involve myself in such politics as abolition. It is another man’s dream, not mine. Besides, it has been but a decade since the Slave Trade Act passed. Customs cannot flip overnight, whatever the law may be. These things take time.”
I bit my tongue. Was a decade not time enough? Surely it was. Despite England’s attempts to end slavery on its own lands and the trade of slaves, the world was far from being rid of the disgusting practice. Perhaps if Father had seen the things I had—had witnessed firsthand the frequent disobedience of the law and how it affected so many lives—he might understand.
