Keeping her meant he had to abandon his unit, and it also meant they couldn’t stay at the Battery for long. They were too close to the city. Once word got out that he’d gone AWOL — if it hadn’t happened already — they’d have to leave the territory altogether.
The Neutral Zone was the only smart choice for them, as it was for most of the criminals, deserters, and lost.
Another punch, this time with his left fist. The heavy bag swung in a wide arc.
Some part of him had always known it would end up this way, especially once he settled on protecting his doe. There were only two ways that story ended, and he wasn’t about to abandon her, so taking her was the logical conclusion. It still came as something of a shock, though, and he couldn’t help but wonder if it was because there was a part of him that still couldn’t believe a good thing would happen to him.
He’d planned to take Cecilia, but he never could’ve imagined she’dwantto stay.
The thought of her in his bed, safe and warm, sent a surge of adrenaline through him. Sloane attacked the bag with a snarl. His fists blurred as he came at it hard, imagining it was the vampire who’d struck her.
He couldn’t seem to focus on one issue at a time. While his gut churned at the thought of leaving his unit, his mind couldn’t stop spinning around the thought of Cecilia.
The idea of a woman like herchoosinghim was so patently outrageous that he struggled to imagine any scenario that would bring it about without coercion or trickery.
The bag swung back at him with considerable force. Sloane slammed his fist into it with a growl, his fangs clenched hard. Sweat sheened his pale purple skin as he hit it again and again.
If he took off his helmet and let the Pull have him, wholly and completely, she wouldn’t have a choice. It was the smart thing to do. He had the tactical advantage of a biological disadvantage. If he allowed himself to become dependent on her pheromones, she would have to stay with him or he’d succumb to madness and death. His doe was far too kind to let something like that happen.
But he didn’t want to do that.
Firstly, the thought of facing her without his helmet was enough to send a shiver down his spine. It was one thing to reveal his face to his unit — and by extension Atria — but to be so vulnerable in front ofher…
Secondly, and more importantly, he couldn’t stomach taking that choice from her.
Breathing hard, Sloane grabbed the bag to stop its swinging. Leaning his sweaty forehead against it, he closed his eyes and imagined what it’d be like to have her. Not just as his charge but as his consort. Hismate.
He couldn’t say he hadn’t imagined what it would be like. Every elf had — even those as broken and fucked up as him. It was built into their DNA to long for that perfect being who’d fit them like a custom-made puzzle piece. But most elves had at least some concept of what to do when they found that person. All he’d been taught was to run as far away as possible.
But he’d always known that if he did somehow manage to find her…
Something weak and needy in him keened for the kind of life he’d been denied. One that wasn’t just bloodshed and orders. One that had laughter and softness and gentle touches. One that hadher.
Taking a deep breath, he pushed off the bag.Adapt,he thought, striking it again.Protect. Find a way to make her stay.
CHAPTER
FIFTEEN
He losttrack of how long he trained. At some point it became less about letting off steam and more to empty his mind completely. It wasn’t like his brain was helping him. All it did was circle around the same problems again and again.
By the time Cecilia began to stir, he’d only come to one conclusion: he had no idea what the fuck he was doing.
But none of that seemed to matter as much as it had an hour ago when he heard the telltale sounds of his consort opening the bedroom door. Swiping his forearm over his sweaty face, he sprinted toward the worktable to grab his helmet. Slamming it onto his head and locking it in place, Sloane stalked out of the armory, intent on finding his doe.
The air was cooler in the hallway. The naked skin of his torso, still slick with sweat, pebbled with the sudden change in temperature.
He paused his hunt when he remembered he hadn’t put on a shirt. Sloane waffled for a moment, aware that a certain amount of pheromones could be absorbed through the skin. The smart thing would’ve been for him to walk back into the armory and retrieve his shirt.
But another thought occurred to him, too, when he heard the sounds of Cecilia moving about the kitchen. His heart rate jumped when he remembered how she’d hopped up on the counter and ordered him to stand between her legs. He hadn’t been allowed to touch her, but she’d touchedhim.The chance that she’d do it again, this time on his bare skin, was too tantalizing to resist.
The filter will do most of the work,he assured himself as he walked silently toward the center of his universe.And it’s not like clothes or armor are pheromone-proof. It’s fine.
Sloane turned the corner to stand at the entrance of the kitchen. He found Cecilia stretched up on her tiptoes to reach the plain white dishes he’d purchased just in case she ended up at the Battery. She was dressed in little more than an over-sized t-shirt and socks, and her dark hair was piled into a messy knot on top of her head. She’d removed most of her bandages, he noticed, leaving the long expanse of her legs visible to his greedy eyes.
She didn’t appear to notice him there for a handful of seconds. Or at least, it didn’t seem like she did until, she huffed, “Hey, champ, can you make yourself useful and get me a?—”
Whatever she’d been about to ask for never made it past her lips. Cecilia had turned her head to give him a sleepy look, but something about seeing him there stopped her abruptly. Her mouth snapped shut and her eyes widened.
