“Only a few months now,” she said, easing into the conversation.
“Yes…” His smile was wide, but behind his eyes, again, that sense of worry. “I cannot wait.”
“Sebastian,” she sighed, reaching up and cupping his face. “I thought we agreed, no more lies.”
He frowned. “I am not lying.”
She snorted. “Another lie.”
“Margot…” He pulled back, his frown deepening. “You know how much I am looking forward to this – our child. I hope you do not think I am merely saying that I am.”
“I know you are not.”
“A boy or a girl, I will love them. Maybe even more than I love you,” he added with a coy wink.
She sighed and held onto his face. “I know that, which was not my meaning. Sebastian…” She made sure to be looking at him. “You are not your father.”
He winced. “I… I know I am not.”
“As you will not turn out like him. And do not dare say you have not thought on this – that it is not what worries you. I know you pretty well by now.” She raised a warning eyebrow at him and was not surprised to see Sebastian bow his head.
He wants to be the perfect husband and the perfect father. He wants to love me and our child with all his heart. But still he worries that it might be for nought, as if this is all a trick and one day his worst fears will be realized.
“What if I am…” he spoke the words softly. “What if when the baby comes, I… I…”
“You what?” she said. “You turn into a cruel, evil thing? That your heart shrivels into stone and you transform into a monster?”
“Maybe.”
She laughed. “Do you remember what you told me about your father? And not how cruel and cold he was. But how much he loved your mother.”
“He did,” he said as if he needed to confirm it. “But –”
“Your mother had nothing to do with who your father was. His love for her, her death…” She shook her head. “He did not change when they married and fell in love. In fact, I suspect that he was a much worse sort before he met your mother.”
He frowned. “What do you mean?”
“That your mother healed him,” she explained. “That, for a short time, she made him a better man. We can change, Sebastian, but only so much. You and I have both proven that. Your mother changed him, kept him happy as best she could.”
“You think so?”
“I think that he started from a worse place, and she brought him to a better one. When he lost her, well…” She shook her head. “He returned to that same dark place. That happens sometimes.”
“What if I…”
She kept that eyebrow raised. “Turn into a rakish bachelor again?” She laughed. “You are not an evil man, Sebastian. A little confused at times, but not cruel. And I like to think that with me here, I do well keeping you in line.”
He laughed. “Better than well.”
“And when our child is born, they will do the same. You have so much love to give, even more when the time comes.” She took his hand and rested it on her belly. “And I just know you’ll make a wonderful father.”
“Only because I have you,” he said.
“Well, obviously,” she joked and then leaned in and kissed him on the lips.
He smiled, and she could see the tension leave him. Then he held his hands to her belly a moment longer, his eyes shimmering as he felt his child shift. “I… I did come here for a reason,” he said finally.
“Oh? Not to stare at me?”
