Despite all that had happened, he still found her to be a beauty of unmatched desire. She was dressed simply, her gown loose-fitting and in no way suggestive of the curves trapped beneath. But it was her eyes that he found and focused on, her full lips, her soft skin.Am I insane for turning her away? Most would think so.
“Oh…” She hesitated when she saw he was with company. “I am sorry. I did not –”
“Not at all.” Sebastian rose quickly. “Is there something you need?” He was surprised that she came to see him, a sign is what it was, one that he would do well to heed.
“I…” She looked across the room, noticing the back of Lord Livingston’s head. “You are with company.”
“Oh, yes…” He shook his head. “Silly me. This is Lord Livingston. And Lord Livingston, I would like for you to meet my wife.”
“Ah, yes.” Lord Livingston rose and turned, smiling broadly for Margot. “The infamous duchess. It is so nice to meet you.” He crossed the room for her. “I have heard nothing but wonderful things.”
Margot stood frozen as Lord Livingston reached her. Her eyes were wide, her expression one of the utmost shock. So frozenwas she that she did not move to offer Lord Livingston her hand, forcing him to take it and give the back of it a kiss.
“I… I…” She looked between Sebastian and Lord Livingston. “I should go.”
“You do not have to,” Sebastian said quickly. “Please, you wanted something?”
“N – no,” she stammered quickly, looking away. “It is fine.” And as quickly as she had come, she was gone.
Sebastian frowned as he looked after her, wondering only for a moment at the strangeness of her reaction, understanding it just as quickly.She is still angry with me. Still, she wonders about my intentions. I cannot blame her, yet I also wonder why she had finally come to see me…
He could only assume that a moment of bravery had forced her hand, but seeing him with company had quickly dashed it. It was frustrating to say the least, because Sebastian needed the push – the reason to speak with her and tell her the truth. Only now, he wondered if he did.
That she had come to see him again was surely a sign. He had wondered long and hard if he should take a chance with her and admit his feelings and the reason he was so scared of them. And now, he had his answer. Helped by Lord Livingston, who had said exactly what he needed to hear.
“She is a beauty,” Lord Livingston said as he sat himself down. “You are a lucky man.”
“Yes…” A smile crept up the side of his face as he came to a decision. “I am.”
It was an hour later when Sebastian found himself at Margot’s bedroom door. His heart thundered inside his chest. His breathing was a storm. And sweat was beading on his forehead while his nerves wreaked their own sort of havoc.
It must be done. No more running. No more lying to myself. At the very least, she deserves the truth, and once she has it, she can decide how she feels.
He knocked once and awaited the reply.
“Yes?” her voice called softly.
A deep breath, and Sebastian entered the room.
She was sitting at the table, staring blankly at the tabletop; there was no book, no ink or parchment. Just her thoughts. But when he entered, she looked up, seeing him step inside the room, and she grimaced and looked away.
“Margot…” He hesitated by the doorway. “We… I…” He swallowed his nerves. “There is something we need to speak of.”
She exhaled as if she had been expecting it. “As do I. That man you were with –”
“No, not him,” Sebastian spoke over her, wondering why she cared about Lord Livingston. “It is us I wish to speak of.”
“Oh…” She blinked, and behind her eyes, he could see her fighting an urge to speak. Rather, she nodded once for him to continue.
“Two nights ago, when we spoke in the garden…” He crossed the room but stopped short of her, as if to get too close might see her leap from the chair and run. “I told you how I felt about you. Or rather…” He sucked through his teeth. “I told you of my attraction to you.”
“You did.”
“More than that, I apologized for how I have been behaving. That it is not your fault. That I am the one who has forced this situation. That the blame lies with me.”
“I remember…” Her voice was distant as if she were remembering the conversation.
“I told you many things,” he laughed awkwardly. “The only thing I did not tell you was the truth.” Sebastian wanted to look away, worried she would see the shame in his eyes. But he forced himself to stare at her. “The reason that I have been acting this way.”
