“No … please …” I begged. But as Nora and Nurse Colleen loosened their grips on my upper body, a different, unseen force seemed to press down, more gently, but firmly, as though pushing me under the surface of water. It felt like I was slowly sinking down into the dark depths.
I heard only one last thing as I slipped down into the darkness—Nora.
“Good. Now—time for my baby to have a baby,” she said, her voice gradually sounding farther and farther away. “Let’s get started.”
Then more darkness.
Then only sleep.
CHAPTER33
IWAS GENTLYFLOATINGas the ebb and flow of the tide rocked me back and forth. The dark waters cradled me in their embrace, like a mother holding her child. I was slumbering in my mother’s womb, and I had nothing to be afraid of; my mother would always be there to hold me, until I was ready to come forth for my birth.
Birth!
My eyes popped open as a slice of pain shot right through my midsection. An invisible hand grabbed my insides with its tight, unrelenting grip and squeezed with all its might. I felt like I might burst.
“Aarrgghh!” I tried to thrash my arms and legs about, but something was holding me down. My eyes darted around, taking in the confusing scene. It seemed my captors had been hard at work while I was unconscious, because things had changed.
I was in the same adjustable bed, through now I faced the center of the room, with the wall behind my head. Straps across my upper body kept me solidly held down; my arms were still tied to the metal railings on either side of the bed. In the crook of my left arm, a needle had been taped in place, connected toan IV that was pumping a clear liquid into my veins. The scratchy ropes that had tied my ankles into the stirrups had been replaced with hospital-grade Velcro straps. My legs were bent at the knees, and spread open.
At the sound of my screams, Nurse Colleen, who had been fussing with her little pushcart of supplies, rushed toward me. Madison, Max, and Nora came thundering in from the back bedrooms.
“Well! She has quite a pair of lungs on her. It certainly sounds like things are moving along, doesn’t it, Colleen?” Nora said.
“Yes, I think it’s time we check her progress,” Colleen answered.
I watched her pull on a fresh set of latex gloves. She walked over to the foot of the bed and rested her hands on my bent knees, looking me in the eyes. “Watch how I’m breathing, Miss. Just breathe through the pain.” She started a pattern of short, labored breaths that sounded likehee hee hoo,hee hee hoo.
After a moment, the vise-grip around my insides started to loosen, and my muscles slowly unclenched. The tidal wave of pain had hit its highest crest and was now slinking back underneath a calm, flat surface. I felt beads of sweat on my forehead; my heart thumped hard in my chest, echoing in my ears.
“Now, Miss, I’m going to see how far along you are now. Try to relax, this may be uncomfortable.” Colleen moved her hand down in between my legs. I felt a dull, probing ache as her fingers slid inside of me, pressing on my swollen cervix and rooting around. “I’d say she’s about six centimeters dilated.” She removed her hand and slipped off her latex gloves with a taut snap.
“Good.” Nora put her arm around her daughter’s shoulders and rubbed them supportively. “Shouldn’t be too much longer now, right?” She looked back and forth between Madison and Colleen.
“Hopefully not. We’ve made excellent progress so far, considering it’s been only five hours.” Colleen answered.
I was asleep that long?What little strip of sky I could see through the blinds on the windows was black.
“We should probably start dialing back on the oxytocin now, since she’s passed the five-centimeter mark,” Colleen advised.
“No,” Nora snapped. “Let’s keep progressing. Like I said—we don’t want to prolong things any longer than we have to.”
“Well, I suppose we can keep it going a little longer. But once she gets to eight centimeters, we’ll definitely need to stop the drip, so she can begin pushing as soon as she’s fully dilated.”
“Fine.”
I felt my body start to contract again; the massive wave of pain was back. It crashed over me, threatening to drown me. I tried to take a deep breath and bear down against it, but try as I might, I couldn’t take a full breath. My mouth flew open and another agonizing wail escaped.
My eyes shut tight as my face contorted with the pain. When I opened them, Madison was staring at me, watching. It almost looked like she had a faint grin on her face. Was she enjoying my pain? I focused all my rage on her for a moment, intensifying the strength and volume of my scream as my eyes bore hatefully into hers. After a moment, her grin finally broke and turned into a frown. She covered her ears with her hands and walked toward Max. They started whispering to each other, then took each other’s hands and disappeared down the hallway. After a moment, Nora followed them.
The pain subsided again after a moment, just like it had the last time. It seemed to be coming at regular intervals. With frightening clarity, I realized that this was really happening.
I was in labor.
Six centimeters dilated … more than halfway there. There’s probably no stopping it now. My baby is coming … tonight.
The realization overwhelmed me. A sob escaped my throat, and tears gushed out. I couldn’t wipe them away, because my hands were tied.
