But when I stand, Sophie’s eyes are on me. She’s not focused at all. This time, I’m not to blame. “What?”
“You’re just so …” A dreamy look crosses her face. “How did I get so lucky?”
I close the space between us in one large stride and wrap my hands around her shoulders; her body responds to mine immediately as she cranes her neck up to receive me. Our lipsmeet, and hers are so soft, so ridiculously soft, that even though I’ve been kissing her all week, I can’t help the groan that escapes my throat.
She hums in response, and I pull her closer, parting her lips with my tongue. I know we can’t get carried away too much, since Julian is right behind us, but this woman drives me batshit crazy. Her hands explore my chest, pulling on the fabric as if her life depended on it, and?—
A loud ring interrupts us. My stupid phone.
Sophie pulls away with a smile; dazed, I take a small step back and give her a good look before I even think of taking my phone out. Her lips are swollen, her skin flushed. And those eyes … God, those eyes. They’re looking at me with such tenderness, yet with a hunger that may rival mine.
I sigh and pull my phone out of my jeans pocket, then peer down to see who’s calling.
My lungs turn to lead when I see Océane’s name.
I’ve been meaning to talk to her for the last few weeks. But every time I grabbed my phone with the intent of calling her, my courage left me. With so much of my energy focused on this new thing blossoming between Sophie and me, I now realize I haven’t thought about how to talk to my little sister.
Rachel keeps telling me I need to go to therapy. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say she and Ryan are in cahoots. But they don’t know each other.
I’m in trouble if they ever meet. One of them—or both, together—is sure to drag me against my will into an appointment with whoever they’ll claim is ‘the best in the city.’
I swallow the dread in an attempt to conceal the shame that has snaked its way through my skeleton. My thumb swipes to decline the call.
How much did my reaction show? It’s hard to tell. But there’s not much I can do now except pray I can sweep this under the rug, because I am not ready to talk about this with Sophie.
She already thinks I’m not trustworthy. When she learns how I’ve been behaving around my sister, that will only reinforce her belief.
“No one important,” I reply in response to Sophie’s inquisitive look.
Her forehead creases. Right as she’s about to say something, Julian starts fussing behind me.
Sophie raises her eyebrows. “Well, that’s my cue!” As she heads to the living room to breastfeed him, I sit back in front of my laptop and drop my chin in my hands.
I need to get my shit together before this fragile thing completely unravels.
CHAPTER 25
SOPHIE
Without so much as a sound, I lay Julian down inside his crib as gently as I can. He stays asleep. Even though he’ll most likely awaken again an hour from now before he settles down for the night, I still crave a moment of downtime.
Like he’s done every night for a few weeks now, Will helped me put the girls to bed. But Gwen and Heather were particularly wired tonight, so it took a bit more coaxing than usual to get them down.
When I waltz back into my living room, Will is already settled into the sectional couch with half of my chenille blanket covering his legs. The scent of licorice tea hits my nose before I spot my mug, and my heart melts.
I could get used to this evening routine.
Shit, I think Ihavegotten used to this routine already.
In a matter of weeks, Will has grown tendrils that have woven their way into every crevice of my life. We haven’t even defined what the hell we are. Because we’re definitely more than friends. Friends don’t make out on the couch and slap each other’s asses in passing. Friends don’t feel the pooling desire Ifeel right now as I settle myself as close to him as I possibly can without sitting right on top of him.
It’s all been so organic. So natural. Like he’s always been a part of our lives. In a way, he has. The past year has only been an interlude. And now, everything has fallen back into place.
Everything is right again.
Will wraps his arm around my back and squeezes me tightly against him. The warmth emanating from his body is a refuge from the coolness hanging in the air. The evenings are starting to get below freezing now, and even though the house has heating, there’s still a nip of cold that won’t leave until spring.
Despite the comfort he brings me right now, a shred of doubt overshadows his warmth, bringing a thin coil of ice to my chest. Earlier this afternoon, I couldn’t help but notice the split second that Will’s body lit up with panic when his phone rang.
