She’s frowning again, her walls coming up. “What’s it to you?”
“The air is chilly,” I remind her with a tight-lipped smile. “Please, let me come in so your baby doesn’t get cold.”
Sophie rolls her eyes but finally backs up. She doesn’t open the door wider for me, though; she lets me do that all on my own. I recognize this as one of her power moves: she’s letting me in, but she’s made it clear that I’m not a welcome guest.
I don’t waste a second and shuffle inside, closing the door to keep the draft out. Immediately, I’m bombarded with a familiar smell. I haven’t been in this home for over a year, and even though Matt no longer lives here, the smell is the same: warm and comforting, clean, with just a hint of citrus.
And I’m close enough to Sophie that I detect her scent, too. Sweet and floral, threatening to veer me off course. For a moment, we both look at each other, her big eyes narrowed to slits.
Sophie breaks the moment by heading to the kitchen table a few feet in front of the entrance. She sits at a chair and carefully shifts Julian in her arms to get them both comfortable. Just as I thought, she’s not going to offer me coffee, or even water. Not that I would expect her to. She has too much self-respect for that.
I respect her for that, too.
“Get on with it,” she says, keeping her voice low.
I cross my arms and take two steps forward, just enough to get a bit closer without walking off the entrance rug with my boots on. Somehow, I don’t think she’d react very well to me getting comfortable enough to remove them. “I would ask you tostrongly reconsider your decision not to move forward with the consulting package.”
She laughs without humour. Julian fusses at her chest, and she starts bouncing him gently. “There’s no way in hell I’m doing that,” she replies.
I take another deep breath and carefully consider my words. “Sophie,” I start, seeing her wince at the sound of her own name on my lips. “Rob showed me everything you want to do. These are really …”—I weigh my words—“lofty goals. Even for someone as talented as you. And with everything that’s happened in the last year …” Anger lights up her eyes, and I decide not to say anything more about that. “You’ve got a lot on your hands. Literally.” I gesture to Julian, who’s beginning to fuss more and more.
“You think I’m not capable?” Sophie stands, trying to position Julian differently so he’ll stop fussing. But this only elicits a small cry from the infant, followed by another, more insistent this time.
“I absolutely think you’re capable,” I reply, keeping my voice steady, even though I want to scream this at her so she’ll understand how much I mean it. “But anyone would be in way over their heads with everything you’ve got going on. That’s why you need us.” Why she needsme.
Or is it me who needs her more?
Sophie huffs. Julian’s cries begin to intensify, so she starts pacing back and forth near the table. “I don’tneedanyone,” she spits out. “And even if I did … do you seriously believe I’d go crawling to you, of all people?”
The image of Sophie crawling to me sends a shock through my system. No part of me believes she’d ever ‘crawl’ to anyone, but I can’t pretend I wouldn’t at least slightly enjoy that sight.
Knock it off, man. That’s not what you’re here for.
“I don’t expect you to crawl to anyone,” I tell her. “I don’t know why it’s so difficult for you to admit a little help might be nice.”
Shit. That was the wrong thing to say. And as I see the dagger appear in her eyes again, I know I’ve messed up.
Why do I keep saying the wrong thing? I am completely off my game today.
This woman does things to me I can’t explain.
“You’d like that way too much,” she says, chuckling dryly. Her eyes keep darting to Julian, who won’t stop crying. “Shhh, Mommy’s here,” she whispers to the infant in a sudden shift of tone. That gentleness and sweetness in her voice pulls at my heart.
“Of course I’d like that. But not for any nefarious reason,” I argue. “Is it so hard to believe I want to see your business succeed? I’ve helped several businesses like yours do exactly what you’re trying to do, Sophie. I know how to get there. I 100 percent believe you could accomplish it on your own, eventually … but you’d be stuck figuring it out for the first time, which would take you much longer. And that’s without mentioning the extra load you have to carry.” I gesture to Julian again. “Case in point.”
“He wasn’t crying before you arrived,” she responds in frustration.
“Right.” Against my better judgement, I remove my boots and walk closer to Sophie. “But this won’t be the last time. He’s still young. So, if you want to achieve these goals as quickly as you told Rob, you can’t do it alone. There’s no shame in that.”
“What are you doing?” she protests, her eyes slightly panicked now that I’m closer.
“Can I try?” I hold out my arms.
She backs away and squeezes Julian against her with both arms. “Absolutely not.” His cries are getting louder, and I can see the desperation beginning to appear on Sophie’s face.
“I’m good with babies,” I say, as softly as I can. “And it looks like you could use a break.”
She hesitates, and it’s clear she’s fighting a battle in her own mind. Her pink lips, usually soft and plump, are squeezed so tight they’re trembling, and her breathing is beginning to quicken. My offer is tempting, but it’s coming from me. A tough choice, really.
