Before I can stop myself, words start spilling out of my mouth. “We were together for five years, sharing an apartment, sharing basically everything, and then one morning before he’s supposed to go to Italy with his brother, he decides he’s done. Just … done. No explanation. And that was it.” My chest tightens at the memory. My throat feels dry.
“Wait …” Logan shifts to face me fully. “You guys talked it out later, right?”
I look down at my feet swinging from the bench. “No.”
“You’re serious?”
“Yes.”
“What an absolute asshole.” His voice is loud, though I can hear him trying to restrain himself. “The coward. I can’t believe he would do that to you.”
“He wasn’t an asshole before,” I say, my voice barely louder than a whisper.
“No, that’s not possible, Avery,” he continues, the anger resonating in his voice. I take one look at his face and get a glimpse of anger I’ve rarely ever seen—not even when the bullies took shots at him.
That’s when I realize: he isn’t pissed because someone hurthim. He’s pissed because someone hurtme.
“You don’t just become an asshole overnight. He showed you who he really was when he did that. And who he is just so happens to be a selfish coward.”
“You don’t even know him,” I argue.
“I don’t need to.” The golden flecks in his hazel eyes are burning in the moonlight. “That act alone speaks volumes about his character. You didn’t deserve that, Avery.”
Didn’t I? I don’t know. I’ve been racking my brain over what could have driven him to do this, and every time I do, I come to the same conclusion. Five years with me was more than enough.
But I don’t want to think about that now. Right now, I just want to think about the way Logan is defending me. Even if he’s wrong, he’s helping me feel a little bit less like discarded trash.
“Thank you.” I keep my voice soft so it doesn’t crack.
“No need to thank me.” He turns back around, his body starting to calm down from the anger. “It’s just logic. And he’s a fool.”
I laugh, thinking to myself that right now, my life doesn’t feelthatbad.
* * *
It’s almost 10 p.m. by the time I walk back inside my cabin. Logan headed back to his place pretty much at the same time as I did, but not before inviting me to our first outing for tomorrow. He hasn’t settled on what we’ll do yet, but he’ll have the entire day to decide since we’re meeting for dinner.
And this time, we exchanged phone numbers.
I crash face-first into the cushy king-sized bed and sigh. I wish I could fast-forward through the day of gruelling writing and skip straight to dinner with Logan. Spending time with him makes me almost feel human again. It’s not like I’m completely over this slump or whatever this is, but almost.
My thoughts trail to Dad, and my heart sinks. I roll on my back and pull out my phone, already knowing I won’t find any notifications from him. But I need to check anyway.
Nope. Nothing except the last message I sent him, still left unread.
Without too much thought, I begin typing a new message.
I wish you could meet the person Logan became. He feels exactly the same, yet different. Good different. But knowing how you can read people, maybe you’d be able to tell what’s going on with him. I don’t know what it is. And I don’t know if I should pry.
I also wish you could tell me what’s going on with me. You know what I mean. I don’t know how you do it, but you always seem to be a step ahead of me. I bet you would have known Jasper was about to leave me, even though it came out of nowhere for me.
I need some direction, Dad. I don’t know what’s going on with you, and I hope you’re okay… but I need a dad right now, and I just wish you’d respond. Even just for a minute. Everything feels fucked and I need one person to tell it like it is to me and no one knows how to do that except you.
Why won’t you let me help?
I hit send, and the tears start falling.
CHAPTER7
