Now, of course, he was more than ever the backstabbing bastard who had seduced Guinevere away from Arthur and helped contribute to the fall of Camelot.Whatever asshole wrote that and made it popular better hope Lancelot never met them in a dark alley.Even the patrol bots wouldn't stop him from that assault charge.
"I really hope this works, because if I spend a day subjecting myself to this nonsense for nothing, I'm usurping your throne after all."
Arthur gave him a reproving look and chided, "You already have a throne—you can't have two."
Lancelot rolled his eyes."You're lucky we're on the same team, because I would gladly throw you around the ring."
"Anytime, fish boy," Arthur retorted.
"I am going to kill Dred for starting that."
"Who is killing me?"Dred asked as they came up alongside Lancelot's left side.
"You, for starting the 'fish boy' thing."
Dred grinned, wholly unrepentant."Gotta keep you royals humble."
Before the bickering could continue, they crested a low hill, and the tournament grounds came into view.They shifted to form pairs in a line behind Arthur leading the way.Players and NPCs milled about.One player looked up at their flag, attached to Gawain's saddle, and jeered."Camelot?Really.Cheap!"
"You are literally dressed as a knock-off Hobbit," Lancelot retorted."Couldn't afford an auth skin?"
The boy sneered."Better than a knight with a frigging katana."
"We'll see how cocky you are after I knock you around the ring, Frodo," Lancelot said dismissively, and rode off as the man was still hurtling further insults.
Dred, sympathetic as always, said, "It is pretty funny poor Arondight is meant for a samurai now."
"She works the same as ever.It's purely cosmetic," Lancelot said through gritted teeth."If you don't quit it, I will punch you so hard you wake up in Tokyo."
"Sounds fun."Dred grinned.
"Enough," Arthur said, and then they were at the entrance and scanning into the tournament.A few more smartasses mocked them for such a predictable name, but the group ignored them.He wasn't going to acknowledge harassment from a group dressed like the characters from a children's show about bumblebees.
"We're going to get to work," Morgan said as they all dismounted, and she handed her horse off to Arthur with a kiss."I assume you four are bound for our tent?"
"Going to examine the tournament grounds, see what we're in for with the competition," Dred said."Some of these groups are rubbing me wrong."
"The ones in all red, I think harkening to that stupid old sci-fi series," Gawain said."They like, protected the emperor or something.I only counted five, though, so I bet their sixth memberisthe emperor."
Galahad looked at him, scandalized."Stupid old sci-fi series?Stupid old sci-fi series?It's calledStar—"
"You're coming with me," Dred said, hauling Galahad away still ranting and raving.
Lancelot shook his head, then pointed a thumb over his shoulder."I'm going to walk the grounds to get a hands-on feel for the layout.Meet back up at the tent at a quarter till the start?"
"Sounds good," Arthur said.He kissed Merlin and Morgan, then headed off.
"I don't recallthathappening in the books," said a random voice.
Lancelot turned toward the voice, and took in the impressively garish teal and gray checkboard tunic emblazoned with black sparrows, the feathers accented in yellow and orange.The man's nose was wrinkled like he'd smelled something foul instead of seeing a man kiss the people he loved.Lancelot stifled a sigh."Which books?There are a lot of them.The earliest tales were purely spoken and never written down until well after the fact, when they'd been warped by time."
"None of them," the man said snottily."I am an expert—"
"You're not much of one if you didn't know Arthur was always deeply in love with Merlin and Morgan.Even back in the day, that was well known.Caused quite the ripples of shock when he married Guinevere instead of Morgan."
The man gave him a look."You're a weirdo, talking like you were there at the time.None of that happened, and even if it did, you couldn't know.If it was true, it'd be in the records somewhere.Everyone knows Arthur loved Guinevere, and she left him for Lancelot."
"You really aren't any sort of expert at all.Guinevere loved Elaine.Lancelot loved Galehaut.But think what you like, it makes no difference to me."He smiled meanly."See you in the arena."He strode off, ignoring the man's replies like he'd ignored the Hobbit, leaving Percival and Tristan to see to the horses.
