Thirteen
Rebekah
* * *
I’m so warm. Too warm. And something heavy is holding me down. For a moment, I think it’s comforting and cozy, but then my mind goes one step further, and panic sets in.
My heart races as I open my eyes. I’m not in my own bed. I know this. It’s too soft. Smells too nice. And there’s bright light shining on my face. The sun doesn’t face the window in my room. It’s dim in the mornings.
“Sweetheart? Are you okay?” At the sound of Adam’s voice, my memory starts filling in all the holes. Dozens of them. Maybe hundreds.
Me sneaking over to spy on my neighbors. Asher finding me and mistaking me for a snoop—which was also kind of true. Asher carrying me over his shoulder like I’m a common thief. Asher tying me to a chair in the Gallant kitchen.
And then Adam.
My heart lurches as it did yesterday morning when I saw him walk into the kitchen.
Adam. My husband. We’re married.
“It’s true…” I mutter.
He chuckles against my back as he kisses my neck. “Yes, firecracker. It’s true. Assuming that you just remembered you married me yesterday.” He sets his lips on my ear and adds in a whisper, “And then I filled your womb with my seed.” His hand eases down to my belly and cups it, even though it’s totally flat.
Butterflies erupt in my tummy as if they were awakened from a deep sleep and now need to take flight, but they’re trapped by my skin.
My breath hitches when his fingers reach between my legs. I’m naked because my new husband insisted we were not wearing anything to bed. Ever.
Last night, I balked at this plan. We even bickered about it, which made Adam laugh. He thought it was funny that we’d been married only a few hours and we were already having our first “fight.”
I pouted and told him it wasn’t a fight but that I’d never slept naked and wouldn’t be able to. Sleeping naked made me feel…naked.
My husband wrapped me in his arms, pulled my back against his chest, tugged the covers over us, and kissed my neck. “Sleep, firecracker.”
And that’s what I did. That’s the last thing I remember. Darn him.
Of course he brings this up again now. “How did you sleep, naked little wife?” he asks after slipping his pointer through my folds and scrambling my brain.
I sigh but don’t answer him. Darn him.
“Are you hungry, sweetheart?” I’m disappointed when he eases his fingers back up to my tummy.
Hungry? I just woke up. Judging by the amount of light in the room, I’d say we slept kind of late. “I’m fine. I don’t eat breakfast,” I tell him softly.
“Rebekah… Is it possible you haven’t been eating breakfast because there was never any food and it would have been too much work to go forage for something to eat in the woods first thing in the morning?”
I bite my lip as he rolls me onto my back. His gaze is intense and concerned as he searches my face. “There will always be food here, sweetheart. You will never be hungry again.” His hand comes to my stomach, his fingers spreading out. “Besides, I want you eating healthy all the time. You never know when you might get pregnant. It wouldn’t be good for the baby for you to skip meals.”
I think about his argument. He’s probably right. Though I know there are plenty of women living in these mountains who don’t have proper nutrition and deliver babies nearly every year. Somehow, they manage.
They don’t look very well, though, I remind myself. They’re always tired. They have bad teeth. Mama once told me that poor nutrition could lead to tooth decay. I’ve been lucky that I’ve had no dental issues and my teeth came in straight. If there had been a problem, I don’t think my father would have agreed to let my mother take me to the city to get dental treatment.
Or any other kind of medical attention. I’ve often wondered if Mama would still be alive today if she’d gone to a doctor sooner. By the time my father took her to a clinic, she was so sick that no medicine could cure her.
An ache forms in my chest. I’ll never know for sure, but I suspect lack of care killed my mother, and on top of that, I bet my father knows it. It was his fault for not providing for her. And now she’s gone. He probably blames himself and takes it out on me. He buries himself in booze so he doesn’t have to think about his mistakes.
“Hey…”
I blink a few times and shake myself out of my sadness.
