King Patrick’s face scrunched up. “I’ll do my best. She enjoys matchmaking. Why, I do not know, as she’s yet to be successful. Still, you’ve done us a great favor by agreeing to join the family and take on so many responsibilities. The least we can do is honor the promises you’ve asked for.”
Yes, that truly was theleastof what you could do. Let’s see if you could manage it. “Speaking of work, I have quite a lot to learn and much to do tomorrow. I think I’ll turn in early.”
“Of course, of course. Rest well. And reach out to me if you need help. I don’t intend to throw you into the deep end.”
“I will. Good night.Father.”
King Patrick chuckled again at the sarcasm and waved me on. Well, at least he appreciated the joke.
I went on my merry way, not sure if tonight’s dinner had been a success or not. At least I knew where I stood currently with the family, and it wasn’t too much of a surprise.
But truly, I must have a private luncheon with Helena and Royce. There were things I needed from them, and things I mustdo for them, to better all of our futures. Although how I’d go about some of it, I wasn’t quite sure.
Definitely time for a good, long think.
Four
James
By the time I finally returned to my rooms, I wasexhausted.
I was also unsure how long I’d even been awake.
Such matters were tricky to calculate when I’d technically been awake for two lifetimes. Er, let’s see…I’d woken up predawn the day before battle and then stayed awake all that night, only to battle the Demon King and die—did death count as sleeping?—and then “woke up” in this timeline again, which meant…er…
My brain was too tired to even try to do the math.
Too long. I’d been awake too long. Clearly.
I got into the bath, hoping the hot water would help me unwind. Despite feeling like a giant fog had taken residence in my head, I felt antsy, unable to truly settle. Like I should be Doing Things, but I was in no state to be doing anything but sleeping.
I tried to reason with myself. Behold the clock on the wall. Note the time? Doth thou not perceive this is a late hour? Doth thou not realize it is past time to retire upon this fine eve?
Somehow, using ancient court language failed to be convincing. I wasn’t quite sure why.
Soaking in the tub did unwind some of the knots in my shoulders. A weary sigh slipped out. How long had it been since I’d even bathed properly…? On the front lines, we used a wet towel to wipe down, if we paused to worry about cleanliness at all. It wasn’t a place conducive to relaxing, to say the least.
I lay there, staring at the ceiling. Ceilings were nice. They didn’t demand things of me, like math or answers. Quite a lovely invention, ceilings.
My eyes slipped closed for a second and I had to shake myself. No, no. No sleeping in the bathtub. That wouldn’t do at all, to accidentally drown and then return to my goddess and have to bargain for athirdchance. Better not to risk it.
I pulled myself free of the water with effort, toweled off, and slipped into pajama pants. It was warm enough in the room to not bother with a top, so I slid into the bed. If my hair became a rat’s nest from sleeping on it while damp, well…I had potions for that.
I closed my eyes, determined to fall asleep. Gods above and below knew I’d earned rest. In the stillness of the room, without even a breeze to ruffle the curtains and only the ticking of the clock to keep me company, I realized it wasn’t my mind that refused to settle.
It was my heart.
My eyes slowly opened and I stared at the red canopy above the bed, the sharp ache in my chest flaring. In all the bustle of arguing with two angels, waking up in the past, and redoing what was now my present, I had somehow failed to properly mourn two things. One, Edwin’s death.
Two, my own.
Edwin’s hurt more than anything. I’d never know who had killed him or why. This nebulous question would likely haunt meto my grave again. There wasno reasonfor it, which made all this more awful. Edwin didn’t have political enemies, like me. He hadn’t been a combatant. I could discern no motive except for one—to hurt me.
Oh, and it had. My world had imploded, and my soul with it. My body had kept moving, somehow, which seemed obscene. How dare my heart keep beating when his had stilled?
Yet beat it had. The demands of duty, of others’ lives, had pushed me to keep moving. Despite not wanting to, despite just wanting to crawl into the grave after him, I’d been forced to complete one more Task.
So I’d chosen to die by the Demon King’s hand. Oh, I made sure I took the bastard with me, destroying his corporeal form so he was forced to return to the Underworld. It was not like I could kill a god permanently, after all. I wasn’t that powerful—just a man with a sword. Still, I’d driven him back down to be sealed once more, which was sufficient.
