And again with the silence, thick and heavy.
I watch Douglass survey her surroundings, taking in everything. I wonder what it looks like to her after being gone for so long. Mickey has done a few upgrades, but the heart and bones of the place remain the same.
Her inspection stops and lingers briefly on the memory wall, then the back hallway that leads to the restrooms, office, and storage, and her mouth downturns in a frown.
Harper spies the burgers waiting on the table and clears her throat. “Come and sit and let’s catch up.”
Because my mama raised me right, I pull out a chair for Douglass. She considers the chair, her frown deepening. You’d think I pulled out a box of scorpions and demanded she stick her hand inside.
With an iciness that penetrates deep beneath my skin, her gaze lifts to my face, and her lips thin in a grim line of disgust. She walks around to the other side of the table farthest from me and pulls the chair next to Harper.
As brush offs go, that was a good one. And something Harper immediately notices. I’m dreading going home later because I can see the million questions she’s going to ask me as soon as we’re alone. Questions I don’t have answers for. Yet.
I drop down into the seat Douglass refused. I should just pick my ass up and go talk to the blonde at the bar. Enjoy the rest of my evening with a woman who clearly wants my attention and my company. Unlike Douglass. Which is exactly why I do the opposite. Grabbing my sparkling water, I sit back and get comfortable.
“We can wait while you order something. Don’t pass up Mike’s offer of free food,” Harper tells Douglass and pushes her basket of fries toward her.
Douglass holds up her hand, fingers splayed. “I’m good. I ate earlier.”
Harper grabs a fry and dips it in the side bowl of ranch dressing that came with her bacon burger. “I still can’t believe you two know each other. You’d think it would’ve come up at some point.”
I’m curious about that myself.
Douglass shifts uncomfortably in her seat, and the dark purple top she’s wearing slips down her right shoulder. I track the fabric’s movement, enjoying how it exposes the pale, luminous skin along the dip of her neck. Again, I’m hit with a perplexing familiarity as an image of my lips biting and tasting the soft dip of a creamy, pale shoulder flickers to life momentarily, before disappearing just as quickly.
“How’s Bennett?” Douglass asks.
Harper’s face alights at the mention of her husband. Bennett is a good man who I consider a brother and a friend. A relationship I’m grateful for after what happened with Chase. And the way Bennett loves my sister—passionately, deeply, all-consumingly. I couldn’t have asked for a better man for my sister to fall in love and spend the rest of her life with.
“Sore. Yesterday was a brutal training day.” Harper laughs. “We videoed last night while he was soaking in an ice bath.”
“I know you miss him,” Douglass replies. The hardness on her face softens as she talks to Harper.
She covers Harper’s hand, giving it a squeeze of support. It’s a little weird witnessing their friendship. The intimacy of it. Douglass wasn’t the type to make close friends or even personal connections with anyone, and her relationship with Amelia was always strained and distant. So different when compared to mine with my half siblings who I only met for the first time several years ago.
Harper sighs and loops a strand of her hair behind her ear. “I do. So much. But he’ll be coming home in a couple of weeks, and I plan to lock us in our bedroom until we make up for every day he’s been gone. Having sex over video isn’t—”
I choke on the Perrier I just swallowed. “Dammit, Harp. Warn a brother next time,” I cough out, grabbing a napkin from the holder and dabbing at the wet spot on my shirt. “I don’t need, nor do I ever want, to hear about my sister’s sex life.”
Harper props her elbow on the table and drops her chin into her open palm, eyes filled with mischief and trouble. “I’m a happily married woman. Of course I have sex with my husband, stupid. Get over it. And you’re one to talk. What was that woman’s name you brought home last weekend? The one who looked like a baked carrot?”
Come to think of it, Harper’s right. She was very orange. Fake tan, perhaps. Mike and I met her and her friend here. Had some drinks. Laughed. Played some pool. Took her home afterward, enjoyed a few, fun hours of meaningless sex, then drove her back to her apartment the next morning after I cooked her breakfast. What was her name?
For the first time since we sat down, Douglass looks directly at me. More like sets me ablaze with her harsh glare. Whatever it is, it works. I lift my glass and gulp down Perrier that no longer tastes good or goes down smoothly, hoping it’ll help cool the sudden burn I feel charring my soul the longer Douglass stares at me.
Harper’s loud bark of laughter causes a few heads from other tables to turn our way. “You don’t remember her name either, do you?”
Jesus, can I blush in mortification any harder? I feel like I’m four again, and Mom is railing on me for drawing on the walls with a permanent marker.
Trying to divert the conversation back to safer topics, I ask Douglass, “How’s your aunt Natalie doing?”
Douglass completely ignores me.
Their aunt took Amelia and Douglass in when their mom died. Their dad died while serving in Iraq when Amelia was a little girl. She never talked about him or brought him up in the four years she and I dated in high school and were engaged. I only know of him from what Mom and Natalie would say.
Natalie is one of the sweetest women you’ll ever meet. She and Mom used to be best friends. I don’t run into her around town as often as I used to. I should drop by sometime and check in, see how she’s doing. Natalie became a surrogate mother to me when Mom was sick. She would come over to our house often to sit with Mom. They would talk or knit or relax out in the garden, enjoying the sunshine and sipping chamomile tea. Natalie even took Mom to a few of her chemo treatments, so I could catch up on my sleep or take Amelia out on a date. Losing out on the time I could’ve had and the memories I could’ve made with my mom while she was still alive will forever be one of my greatest regrets. And I have a dump-pile of them. Cutting Natalie out of my life after the wedding was called off is just one of the dozens in the long line of regrets I carry around with me.
When Amelia cheated on me and destroyed what we had built together, I losteverything. Not only my fiancée and Chase, but also the future I dreamed about.
