“No. If you weren’t so busy trying to get into that girl’s pants, you would have played better. Football is the end game, JD, not some street-corner pussy. You can get that anywhere.”
Who does this asshole think he is?
JD pushes off the wall and gets in his father’s face, literally spitting in it. “You ever say anything like that again about Aurora and you’ll regret it. She’s my girlfriend and you will show her the respect that she deserves.”
My heart starts thumping at his words.
JD’s dad doesn’t back down. “I told you that staying out late would hurt your performance. You’ve been playing like a two-bit middle school rookie ever since you started seeing that girl and I won’t have it!”
“Youwon’t have it?” JD roars. “Stop trying to live your failed football career through me. I’m sick and tired of it. I play for me, not you. And I’ll see Aurora whenever and wherever the hell I want! You can’t stop me!”
“You will do exactly what I say because you live undermyroof inmyhouse and enjoy the luxuries thatIprovide you. You have nowhere else to go. You have no money other than the bank account I set up for you which I can easily take away. No other place to live, no income, no way to afford that big, fancy college you plan to go to. I’m it for you! You need me!” his dad yells at him.
“Fuck you,” JD seethes, but I can tell by the way his body posture is deflating that he’s giving up.
And then I flinch when JD’s father backhands him across the face. I know more than anyone how that feels. My sister, Angelica, hits me all the time. I grew up under my mother’s fists. Dammit! What can I do? I need to do something. I can’t stand by and do nothing.
I back up a few steps down the hallway and call out as loudly as I can, “JD, are you here?”
I can hear his father’s hushed, harsh whispers. After a second, JD walks around the corner, a huge, fake smile in place across his face. “Hey, sunshine. Just got done. Sorry it took so long. Let’s get out of here.”
He doesn’t wait for me to reply before taking my hand and pulling me along like he can’t wait to get the hell out of there. I don’t blame him. As he pushes open the exit door, I take a quick glance back. JD’s father is standing at the end of the hallway. An unpleasant shiver races down my spine at the look of pure hatred etched on his face as he watches us walk out.
Chapter 20
JD hasn’t said a word since we got in his truck. I keep looking over at him while he drives. He must sense my worry because he brushes the side of my cheek with the back of his forefinger when he stops at a stop sign, then moves my hand over to his thigh. He curls his warm hand over mine, his thumb painting small circles on my wrist.
“How much did you hear?”
I involuntarily jerk against my seat belt when he speaks, his deep, baritone voice catching me by surprise after minutes of silence.
“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask him, not sure what to do or what to say. This relationship stuff is very new to me. I feel a great need to comfort him; I just don’t know how. Whenever Mom or Angelica would hit me, I’d seek out Cam. Many nights were spent with him lying in his bed with his arms wrapped around me while I cried.
“That much, huh?” he replies, despondency clinging to each word.
I unbuckle my seat belt and lean over the console to rest my head on his shoulder.
“I remember the first time Mom hit me. I was maybe three, and it was after my father—who I thought was my father—left us. She always told me growing up that it was my fault he left.”
“Aurora, babe. You don’t have to tell me this.”
“I know I don’t have to, but I want to. I want you to know me. The real me. The part of me that no one else knows.”
“Not even Cam?”
“Not even him.”
I take a second to collect my thoughts, wanting to offer him as much of the truth of my life as I can.
“A lot of people say they can’t remember things that happened when they were little, but I remember it all. Every minute of that day is burned with vivid detail in my brain. Angelica rarely was home. I was too young to care why. I remember the cereal I ate that morning. I had to get it myself from the cupboard by climbing up on the kitchen counter. I was used to feeding myself, even at my young age. I remember playing alone for most of the day until I got bored and went to Mom’s bedroom wanting to ask if she’d play with me. I was a late potty trainer and had peed in my underwear earlier that day, so I was walking around the house naked. I remember opening her bedroom door, the stench of her cheap cigarettes hitting me and how much I hated that smell. I remember the littered bottles of vodka and beer that lay scattered across her bedroom floor and the sound they made when they clinked against one another as I tripped over them. I landed on one of the bottles and it broke into pieces, cutting my leg and stomach. I started crying and that’s what woke Mom up from her drunken stupor.”
My voice hitches painfully as the memories flow freely now. “I was on the floor, bleeding. All I wanted was for my momma to pick me up and hold me. I held out my arms to her, calling for her. She stumbled out of bed and started screaming at me. Then I remember her picking up one of the empty bottles. Did you know that it takes about thirty to forty Joules of force to break an empty beer bottle? I looked it up one day at school. That amount of force can crack the human skull.”
JD pulls over on the side of the road and shuts the engine off. He turns in his seat and grabs both of my shoulders with trembling hands, his navy-blue eyes filled with horror. “Fuck, Aurora. I don’t think I’m going to be able to listen to the rest of it.”
I reach over and calmly shush him. “It’s alright. I don’t remember anything after that anyway. But that was the first time my mother ever beat me. It wasn’t the last.” I wipe at the tear that escapes his eye. “Don’t ever let him hit you again, JD. You are good and kind and one of the most amazing people I have ever met. You deserve so much better.”
“So do you,” he says and hauls me into his lap, kissing me with everything he has, and I kiss him back just as passionately.
